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Catie Lazarus

Catie Lazarus

Posted: June 16, 2009 11:30 AM

Letterman Should Call Himself Letterperson from Now On


Dear Sarah,

OMG! Even his last name sounds sexist- LetterMAN. Really? No apology is complete without change! He should call himself David Letterperson! Then he'll entice more viewers- lady flight attendants, teens-aged 14 or 18, anyone old enough to buy a Caribou Barbie. You saved us from the real enemy- Dirty Old Men- without having to enact any legislation! Nice highlights, BTW.

I wrote in my gratitude journal today. I'm grateful that you haven't geeked out cooped up in meetings with constituents, lobbying, and wearing elitist lady politicians sneakers to work.

Finally, the news reporters quit yabbering about the economy, Iranian elections, and that brutal murder of that Dr. Tiller. Is it true abortion doctors go door to door into women's homes, like Jehovah's Witnesses, Latter Day Saints, and Mary Kay reps? Pro-Choice is a cult! They claim they're pro-family, pro-child, pro-lady, but anti forcing women (and girls) to bear babies they can't provide for economically or emotionally. Speaking of babies having babies- how are your babies and grandbaby? (Sorry I can't remember all their names, I can hardly keep up with the list of detainees!)

Your teen daughter is a good girl though- stay at home mommy putting her baby FIRST. Glad you finally grounded her baby's daddy Levi. Bristol could look after your son too, now that college is second fiddle. Maybe one day she'll run for office. Her campaign can be, "Take Trig Not Trigonometry!"

With all your traveling to do TV appearances in NYC and LA, are your kids home with a nanny? Hope she's legal! I'm NOT judgy judgy, I just know how you are with this woman's and immigrants rights crap!

How creepy is it that NOW is jumping on your bandwagon? Trying to be friends with the alpha popular princess by sweeping abortion, pay parity, stem cell research under the rug! NOW's fundraiser party is tonight. I wonder if those nerdy liberal loyalists will even show. You going? You didn't RSVP on Facebook so I'm guessing you're still on that Presidential Campaign Trail to Nowhere... Whatevs, at least it's on Alaska's dime, not yours.

TTYL!

A Ladygirl Voter!

Dear Sarah, OMG! Even his last name sounds sexist- LetterMAN. Really? No apology is complete without change! He should call himself David Letterperson! Then he'll entice more viewers, like lady fligh...
Dear Sarah, OMG! Even his last name sounds sexist- LetterMAN. Really? No apology is complete without change! He should call himself David Letterperson! Then he'll entice more viewers, like lady fligh...
 
 
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08:14 PM on 06/17/2009
Catie,

My sides are splitting from laughing so hard at all the blogs of the last day or so. Take trig, not trigonometry. Another blogger warned Letterman not to make jokes about the Alaskan pipeline. The words may be confused between the gas pipeline and Piper Palin and many others.


I'm glad this is turning into a big joke! Nice going governor!
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justlw
Nehemiah Scudder 2012: Now More Than Ever
02:26 PM on 06/17/2009
David LetterperCHILD, please.
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MikeHermit
Proud Atheist
01:57 AM on 06/17/2009
An honest attack on Sarah. Especially "Your teen daughter is a good girl though- stay at home mommy putting her baby FIRST."

While I am not espousing that good mommies are "Stay at home", I would argue with anyone that they should at least be "Stay at home state". By the way, I heard she is the Governor somewhere. Texas? New York? Iowa? I am getting confused nowadays. But I believe she is in Alaska more frequently then Bush was in D.C.
12:51 PM on 06/16/2009
Nice piece. The absurdity of this story is off the charts. It amazes me that Letterman decided to apologize to her again! I think anyone with a sense of humor, who thinks any public figure is fair game for comedy, should boycott David Letterman until he apologizes to those of us whose comedic sensibilities were offended by this effusive and completely unnecessary apology to Sarah Palin.
http://www.radicalrationalist.com/2009/06/16/letterman-apologizes-boycott-david-letterman/
12:40 PM on 06/16/2009
@Catie -- I love you!

No really, I love your writing style, your humor, your wit ... you are awesome! 5 stars.

[Cerebrl]
12:15 PM on 06/16/2009
Welcome to Bizarro World. A backwards world where an intolerant female with views paralleling the anachronistic patriarchal mentality becomes the 'unspoken' face for modern feminism.
05:18 PM on 06/16/2009
Oh, so sadly true! Well said.
07:47 PM on 06/16/2009
This was pretty funny. I give you 4 stars! Good job pippi!