09/10/2005 11:17 pm ET Updated May 25, 2011

Bounds of Reason

I just read most of Greg Gutfeld's and David Rees's point-counterpoints on why it's terrible to be a liberal or conservative respectively and how clever it is to be the opposite (I would have read them in their entirety if I had nothing left to do for the next three days). I am proud to say that there is one line in both of theirs that applies to me and me only:

"Did you get beaten up by a group of pissed-off Cubans?"

I don't know why they both put that in there because it's a rather curious happenstance and not a fate likely to befall most, whether liberal or conservative. But as it so happens, I was beaten up by a mob of angry Cubans once.

I was protesting in front of the house Elian Gonzalez was staying in Miami with a sign that said, "Send Elian Home." This protest lasted for about one and a half seconds before there were about a hundred sweaty-toothed Cuban madmen on top of me (this is no exaggeration, NBC has the tape to prove it).

They ripped up my sign, shredded my shirt, kicked me in the back, legs and groin, scratched my neck, punched me in the back of the head and curiously ... pinched me in the ass. I couldn't figure out whether the pinch was supposed to inflict pain or shame or whether it was just an angry gay Cuban looking to have a good time.

Anyway, back then I was a Republican who had recently voted for Jeb Bush. I am fervently anti-communist. I believe Castro is a murderous tyrant who oppresses his people. I don't even think Che Guevera is cool. Of course, that night Fox News Channel said I was a "pro-Castro agitator" and had guests that speculated that I might be a Cuban spy.

You know what the reality was -- I thought the kid should go home so that he could live with his dad. Call me crazy.

Sometimes it's just not a Republican or Democrat thing. If you've ever read any of my other posts here, you know that I am vehemently against this Bush administration. And though, in these highly politicized days, I'm sure no one will believe me -- my stance against the administration is also not a Republican or Democrat thing.

I voted for George H. W. Bush and I am still proud of that vote. I voted for Jeb Bush for Governor of Florida, and in hindsight, I have never been more embarrassed about a vote. George W. Bush was the first Republican I ever voted against, and I couldn't be more proud of a vote.

Some people who have commented on my posts have wondered whether I am a liberal or a conservative because honestly in my writings sometimes both labels come up. The fact is I am neither. I believe in this crazy philosophy called -- the bounds of reason.

When taxes for the highest bracket were at 70%, that was outside the bounds of reason. I supported Ronald Reagan. When liberals called for unilateral disarmament, that was outside the bounds of reason. I supported Republicans. When campus liberals (who obviously didn't understand the term) were for curtailing freedom of speech in the name of harassment codes, that was outside the bounds of reason. I supported conservatives.

When Republicans claim they want to drown government in the bathtub, that is outside the bounds of reason. I support the Democrats. When George W. Bush takes us into a senseless war against a country that did not attack us, that is outside the bounds of reason. I support his opposition. When conservatives argue that deficits don't matter, then I'm no longer a conservative.

These politicians and interest groups change their stance so many times depending on who's in charge that I can't keep up with what they stand for anyway.

I'll tell you what I stand for -- reason!

I wasn't sure whether there was enough data on global warming in the 80's and even in the 90's. But now that almost every scientist in the world agrees that global warming is reality, there is no more reasonable argument.

Furthermore, the people who argue against all the scientists reveal themselves as frauds and more interested in their personal gain than the public welfare. And that makes me angry.

I could go on and on. And I will in later posts. But for now, if we could all get back within the bounds of reason, I think we would be much better off as a country. Call me crazy.