What Happens When Iraq Asks Us to Leave?

George Bush is such a funny president. If the consequences weren't so absolutely dire, you could almost make a sitcom out of it. This guy claims to be "the decider." He pretends to be in charge and the CEO President. Is there a greater insult to CEOs?

So, Mr. CEO Decider President, I have one simple question for you: What happens if the people and the government of Iraq ask us to leave?

It is such a fundamental question. You would think that if you are occupying a country, especially if you are pretending they volunteered to be occupied, you would have come up with an answer to such a basic question. What if they no longer volunteer for occupation?

With the alleged massacre at Haditha, a new BBC report of civilians being killed in Ishaqi, the killing of a pregnant Iraqi woman on the way to the hospital earlier this week, and the killing of the Iraqi ambassador's cousin - there is some chance that some Iraqis might not be ecstatic about our stay.

Americans completely underestimate the level of anti-American fervor brewing right beneath the surface in Iraq. The great majority of the population is Muslim Arabs. Anyone who thinks they are secretly greeting us as liberators in their minds doesn't know the first thing about the Middle East.

If they actually are a democracy, then the will of the people will eventually - and perhaps sooner rather than later - be imposed on the government. And when the Iraqi government tells us to pack our bags, we will have two choices.

1. Leave. 2. Fight the Iraqi government, along with every other insurgent group and militia faction in the country.

Clearly, the second choice is maniacal and untenable. Meaning our exit from Iraq might be a lot sooner than we think. When confronted with this possibility, administration officials, and many journalists, will say, "Oh, don't worry, that will never happen."

Then I laugh and laugh and laugh. Of course, it will happen. The only question is when. And there is a very specific answer to that - when the people in power in Iraq believe it is slightly more advantageous to have the Americans leave rather than stay.

But remember that might not be a rational decision. The masses are fickle. Their anger might sweep them up one day a lot quicker than their caution might warrant. There are also forces inside the Iraqi government, like Muqtada al-Sadr, who would benefit from the American departure and would be happy to expedite that process.

You throw a little fuel on this fire, and you'll be having a barbecue before you know what hit you. And these past two weeks, we just threw a whole heap of fuel on this Iraqi fire. Now, unfortunately, we will see how it burns.

I'm not saying it's going to happen tomorrow, but it might be time to start thinking about packing our bags.

On the upside, those four permanent bases in Iraq, which a lot of us rational people were so worried about, just became irrelevant. They will be abandoned. Once the Iraqi people turn on the occupation, it will not be feasible to stay inside those bases. They might as well stop building them now because every dollar spent on them is an American taxpayer dollar flushed down the drain of the Iraqi desert.

Iraq will not be Japan. It will not be Germany. Or South Korea. We will be asked to leave. The population at its core is not friendly to us. Every dollar spent building American infrastructure there is a dollar absolutely wasted.

As with most of what I have written about Iraq, you can believe me now or believe me later. Those are your only two choices. And, of course, whether you believe me or not is entirely irrelevant because, as a wise man once said, reality has a way of insisting itself upon you.

On the other hand, a not so wise man is the one in charge of formulating policy for the possible problems that might arise if Iraq asks us to leave. Anyone have confidence that the decider has a beat on this one and knows how to answer these questions? Laugh along with me. Do you think his tiny mind has even formulated this question, let alone worked up the courage to ask Dick Cheney?

If you're a Republican who is still hanging on to this hapless "CEO President," do you honestly believe he has thought through what his contingency plans are if and when the Iraqis hand us our walking papers? That he has a cogent plan he is waiting to unleash?

Come on, admit it, even you're chuckling at the idea. God help us all.

The Young Turks

Follow Cenk Uygur on Twitter: www.twitter.com/TheYoungTurks