When my parents moved to America from France in the early 1950's, maman was eight months pregnant. She left behind her large, boisterous and close-knit family in France and followed papa because he wanted to start a new life in the New World. In those days, French people didn't just pick up and leave and cross the ocean, especially not with a baby on the way. But Maman followed her heart. Maman raised six children in a country where she had no relatives, and at first no friends to help her, and where she didn't speak the language or know the customs. But she learned them.
Maman must have deeply loved papa to leave all that was familiar behind, and papa was no ordinary man. Take camping. Camping for my dad meant spending the three summer months in a cow field in Kentucky, sleeping in tiny pup tents, using a stinky wooden outhouse, and cooking over a campfire. We cleaned ourselves by bathing in the river below, and my mom had to trek into town to a Laundromat while papa went to work during the day. Some of us tykes were still in diapers, and it wasn't easy taking care of us with no running water (other than the river below). At night, papa would take us frogging in an old rowboat on the river, and we would eat froglegs for breakfast cooked over the open campfire. It wasn't till I moved to France as a young adult that I realized that the French did in fact eat frog legs, but not for breakfast, and usually not cooked over an open fire.
My family moved often, about every three years because that was how long it usually took for papa's construction projects to be completed, and then it was on to the next one. Pittsburgh, Cleveland, Rosebank on Staten Island, Portsmouth, Stapleton Heights on Staen Island, Altadena in California, and so on - maman took it all in stride. Think of all the moving and organizing that meant maman had to do; the number of boxes to pack and unpack, all the stuff six children and a few pets can accumulate. The new school enrollments, finding new doctors and dentists, and acclimating to a new small town or a new big city, trying to find babysitters and make friends. My mother's French accent was so think, that everywhere we moved people thought maman had just moved from France, and would comment, "So, you're from France; how do you like America?" Once maman had obtained her American citizenship, she would respond "I am an American, what do you think?! I have six children they are all born here!"
When people see what life with my son, Jeremy, entails in terms of energy, and organization, advocating, resource-finding, they often ask, "How do you do it? How do you handle raising a child so impacted by autism, besides having Rebecca?" I think of maman, raising the six of us (ok, none of us have autism but we had our share of neurodiversity in the family) in different cities every three years, and I realize where my resourcefulness came from. "I had a great role model," I reply.
Happy Mother's Day, Maman!
Want to reply to a comment? Hint: Click "Reply" at the bottom of the comment; after being approved your comment will appear directly underneath the comment you replied to
Things my mother taught me.
My mother taught me…
1. …TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE .
'If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning.'
2. …RELIGION.
'You better pray that will come out of the carpet.'
3. …about TIME TRAVEL .
'If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week!'
4. … LOGIC.
'Because I said so, that's why.'
5. … MORE LOGIC .
'If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the shops with me.'
6. … FORESIGHT.
'Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident.'
7. … IRONY
'Keep crying, and I'll give you something to cry about.'
8. … about the science of OSMOSIS ..
'Shut your mouth and eat your supper.'
9. … about CONTORTIONISM.
'Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck!'
10. … about STAMINA.
'You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone.'
11. … about WEATHER .
'This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it.'
12. … about HYPOCRISY.
'If I told you once, I've told you a million times. Don't exaggerate!'
13. … the CIRCLE OF LIFE.
'I brought you into this world, and I can take you out.'
14. ... about BEHAVIOUR MODIFICATION .
.'
'Stop acting like your father!'
15. ... about ENVY.
'There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do.'
16. ... about ANTICIPATION.
'Just wait until we get home.'
17. ... about RECEIVING .
'You are going to get it when you get home!'
18. ... MEDICAL SCIENCE.
'If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to freeze that way..'
19. ... ESP.
'Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you are cold?'
20. ... HUMOUR .
'When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don't come running to me.'
21. ... HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT .
'If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up.'
22. ... GENETICS.
'You're just like your father.'
23. ... about my ROOTS .
'Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?'
24. ... WISDOM .
'When you get to be my age, you'll understand
25. ... about JUSTICE
'One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you.'
You must be logged in to comment. Log in or connect with