Parroting a rule that frat boys have known for years (second only to Drunk Girls Are Easy), Walter Kirn takes on the notion that ugly is the new pretty in the June edition of Elle. And I can't decide if I love him or hate him for it.
On one hand you have this unbelievably awesome observation about an unconventional beauty:
"Tilda's [Swinton] unorthodox glamour overwhelmed me. Her pallor turned luminous. And because she lacked the curves and cleavage of the stereotypical female star, there was nothing to distract me from her assured, refined intelligence, which was the sexiest thing about her. In even her most ordinary gestures--raising her coffee cup, patting her pockets to find a ringing cell phone--there was a magnetic elegance. She moved the way thought moves, with a quiet fluidity."
But then he includes this little gem about a mousy buttoned-up secretary:
"Straight hair, straight posture, straight in every way. Flat, too. And wearing glasses. Yet she was provocative as hell, like a stripper who was working under deep cover. She had a disciplined, stealthy sensuality that seemed to whisper to me as she slipped by: "What you see isn't half of what you'll get." (Watch a lot of porn, Walter?)
"I set out to get it, whatever it was, confident I would face little competition."
So to sum up, Mr. Kirn likes ugly girls because their "asymetrical features" and "substantial hips" don't outshine their inner "luminescence" but also because their low self-esteem makes them easy and keeps the other guys away. Interesting thoughts from a man who was married to a model.
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It's nice to read something that talks about everday women and unconventional beauty as being sexy. There is a huge difference between saying 'ugly girls are easy' and saying 'I find conventional beauty to be boring and am far more attracted to unconventional beauty'. And of course, just because Mr. Kirn is attracted to unconventionally-beautiful women doesn't mean he'll actually get anywhere. After all, since we're more comfortable with ourselves, we don't need some dude's attention or approval to feel sexy.
Lack of competition doesn't necessarily mean "low self-esteem" or even "easy." It may be simply a "tactical" observation.
Not that that makes Mr. Kirn's comments any less depressing.
"Beauty is in the eye of the beholder" is true...... for every guy obsessing over a size 0 pogo stick, there are others reveling in zoftig curves..... some are aroused by appearance, others by intellect - or even humor.....
The saddest thing is when somone is attracted to someone for who they are, as they are - but the object of their attention can't deal with it. A friend is overweight - always has been and given her history, always will be. I suspect there's some physiological thing at work and some psychological aspcts as well - but no matter. She is who she is. No efforts to lose weight have worked - including surgery.
A guy fell for her - madly. Nice guy, attractive, no discernable negatives. Turns out he LIKES overweight women. They trigger his arousal switch. You think this is a perfect match. She's large and that's a real turn on to him. She was thrilled with him - they had a great thing going - until she found this out. SHE was insulted. Dumped him. A decade later this woman is still as she was - and still single, with no prospects in sight.
From my own pov, I was never attracted to drop-dead gorgeous women. Most had spent their whole life obsessing over the most superficial part of who and what they were. There's something to be said for 'inner beauty' - it holds up better and those possessing it get
Charlotte - Did you miss the part where, in fact, there was plenty of competition for this woman's attention? And do you really think he was implying Tilda Swinton had a self esteem problem? Quite the contrary. I think he was describing his internal road to the revelation that unconventionally beautiful women are interesting and excicting. Perhaps a lack of competition was a thought he had along the way, but really doesn't dominate the article. So I guess I'm comfortable viewing the article in the more positive light. Thanks for pointing to the article, BTW, which was at least somewhat thought-provoking.
- Frank Zappa
I have always been oblivious to most high maintenance women. Those that work hard to look like a traditional beauty are nothing to me, now the ones that are just unbelievably stunning but in that simple way are another thing all together. But a Real woman that is smart and funny, self confident and able to have a good time in most situations is, and always will be SEXY AS HELL!!!
Oh Jesus Christ on a Cracker. Dude, when you then say:
"... which was the sexiest thing about her. In even her most ordinary gestures--raising her coffee cup, patting her pockets to find a ringing cell phone--there was a magnetic elegance. She moved the way thought moves, with a quiet fluidity."
It's not her INTELLIGENCE that you're noticing. This is so creepy I want to go shower.
JP