When the PTA president at my son's elementary school in Northern Virginia put out a memo last week requesting parents to help clear snow at school, I fell over myself--and heaps of discarded snow clothes--on my way running out the front door.
"Whoa. Where're you off to?" called my husband, strumming his guitar on the sofa strewn with newspapers, his sixth day at home since a spate of severe snowstorms shut down the Washington, DC area.
"To shovel sidewalks at school," I said, and then whispered conspiratorially, "we've got to get him back to school!" As if our son could hear, the cacophony of a car racing video game blasting out of the basement.
"Don't hurt yourself."
Today, I lie in bed on a heating pad, watching the morning news. To add to my pain, the forecasters are talking about another few inches of snow on Monday. NOOOOO. Call me the Grinch, but I am through with snow days.
Oh, it was sweet at first: hot chocolate, log fires, bouillabaisse--my family at home. Our son built snowmen and forts, had sleepovers and snowball fights, went sledding and skating. But you know it is time for no more snow days when:
1. You are out of milk, firewood and frozen fish.
2. The grocery store is out of milk, firewood and frozen fish.
3. Your son is bored of snow.
4. Your husband is building an igloo to pass the time.
5. Groundhog Day has nothing to do with spring.
6. Shared snow pictures on Facebook make you cringe.
7. The jumble of winter boots at the front door looks suspiciously like furniture.
8. The radiator is a Christmas tree, with smelly damp decorations.
9. You cancel the call to the plumber, when you realize your son and his pals walked in the backdoor and neglected to remove their outerwear.
10. Your skinny jeans feel like cold metal pipes.
11. Your skinny jeans feel a tad too tight.
12. You never want to wear layers again, no matter how fashionable.
13. Hell has frozen over--in the backyard.
14. You want to throw your husband and son's snow gear into the backyard.
15. Public parking lots are a public endangerment.
16. The driving public is a public endangerment.
17. Electric outages bring you to your knees.
18. Icicles are weapons of mass destruction.
19. You consider booking a Haitian cruise.
20. The School Superintendent asks to borrow a sled for his visiting granddaughter in an email Re: Facilities Updates.
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21. The Winter Olympics do nothing for me.
Very funny post that rang very true. Good luck!
And, we have a winter weather warning for the next three days. HELP!