CHELSEA PERETTI is a writer and comic living in New York.

With her brother, Jonah, she co-created web satire blackpeopleloveus.com and the New York City Rejection Line: (212) 479-7990. Both projects were recently exhibited at the New Museum.

She writes occasionally for print publications (like the Village Voice), blogs, does readings, and sometimes appears on tv (Comedy Central, VH1, AMC) in some mutated form or another.

She is co-producer of the Variety Shac, a live show that premieres a new short film each month.

Blog Entries by Chelsea Peretti

Thought of a Joke Today

Posted February 23, 2006 | 02:37 PM (EST)


It's one of those old-timey call and answer type jokes--and extremely political--so I think you all will love it.

CP:
How did the doctor become invisible?

Crazed Liberal HuffPo Readership & and Crazed Trolling Right:
HOW?

CP:
My healthplan did not allow me to see him.

Read Post

edite

Posted September 29, 2005 | 03:25 AM (EST)


edite2.jpg

envelope.jpg

lastevite.jpg


attending.jpg
Tom DeLay
James W. Ellis
John D. Colyandro
Adam Kidan
Jack Abramoff

notyetreplied.jpg
...

Read Post

Informal Poll

Posted August 31, 2005 | 03:36 PM (EST)


Which did you like better The 40 Year Old Virgin or Wedding Crashers (40 or WC)?

Read Post

New Orleans Photos

Posted August 30, 2005 | 12:35 AM (EST)


Current pictures on Flickr with the Katrina tag.

From my last visit to New Orleans:
rustyride.jpg

Read Post

KIM JONG IS THE IL-LEST!

Posted August 4, 2005 | 02:07 PM (EST)


Guys, exciting news on the Kim Jong-il front!

According to...er.........an article "on a Web site run by North Korea":

Kim surprised a group of North Korean officials attending a meeting in 2002 by recalling all their phone numbers "with lightning speed."

"SURPRISE!!"

On a day...

Read Post

DIE DANIEL TANG DIE

Posted August 3, 2005 | 04:28 PM (EST)


spam.jpg

DIE DIE DIE

I'LL BUY YOU A PLOT OF LAND BESIDE MAX JOHNSON PLEASE DIE FOR ME DIE!

EVERYONE DIE!

Read Post

Proof That American Teens Have Lost Their Minds!

Posted August 1, 2005 | 12:23 PM (EST)


Huh? What the? Kids take heroin and IM each other?

Whatever happened to logical deviant trends like phone sex? Why would anyone want to be messed up on heroin and then log into IM? And why coordinate from different townships to both shoot up at...

Read Post

SHARKS: WE HAVEN'T GONE ANYWHERE.

Posted August 1, 2005 | 02:15 AM (EST)


REMEMBER US?
need2ask.jpg
SHARKS!

WE'RE STILL IN THE WATER, WE STILL SWIM GOOD.

OUR TEETH ARE STILL SHARP.
omg.jpg

PLUS, NOW WE KNOW OUR WAY AROUND YOUR NEIGHBORHOOD.

Read Post

Liveblogging -- from Jury Selection NYC

Posted July 22, 2005 | 11:29 AM (EST)


TIME I WAS TOLD TO ARRIVE AT JURY SELECTION: 8:45AM.
MAATAJS (My Actual Arrival Time at Jury Selection): 9:30AM.

I was expecting to join a handful of people, had no idea it would be freaking Ellis Island style, anonymous, DMV type masses waiting for their names to...

Read Post

SHARK SAFETY TIPS: CONTINUED! (With John Mulaney)

Posted July 5, 2005 | 12:55 AM (EST)


Due to the recent shark attacks in Florida (Fla.) and beyond, we are offering a refresher on Shark Safety.

DO:
playcards.jpg

DO NOT:
donot.jpg

SURE, DO:
golf.jpg

NO WAY, DON'T DO THAT

Read Post

INFAMOUS NEVADA BROTHEL BACK IN BIZNIZ!!

Posted July 2, 2005 | 09:08 PM (EST)


Associated Press Celebrates with: Most Disappointing Slideshow Ever Assembled.

Read Post

SHARK SAFETY TIPS: DOS AND DO NOTS

Posted July 2, 2005 | 12:41 AM (EST)


Due to the recent shark attacks in Florida (Fla.) and beyond, we are offering a refresher on Shark Safety.

DO:
playcards.jpg

DO NOT:
donot.jpg

~TO BE CONTINUED~


(Tip team: Chelsea Peretti and John Mulaney)

Read Post

Hahahahaha.

Posted June 15, 2005 | 02:47 PM (EST)


"Schwarzenegger left the stage almost immediately after his speech, speeding across the infield in a golf cart surrounded by sprinting security guards. Across the field, he pulled up toward a waiting SUV and a large steel gate was closed behind him."

Read Post

Why are liberals so scared to talk about how the end times are nigh?

Posted June 7, 2005 | 10:07 AM (EST)


It seems like liberals want to act all brave like "oh, I'll talk about whatever, I'm very openminded" etc, etc, until the topic of the end times being nigh is brought up. Then all of a sudden no one's so open to differences of opinion anymore. Well, that's not how...

Read Post

Guys, couple questions 4U: what's fillibustering, who's bolton, and what is deep throat?

Posted June 2, 2005 | 10:49 AM (EST)


Any help would be appreciated...C

Read Post

Re: Previous post about the draft

Posted May 18, 2005 | 05:01 PM (EST)


"Can anyone tell me, are they going to bring back the draft? I have three sons -- all nearly teenagers -- and am terrified that they will. Why don't they make it that just Republican kids get called up?"

I agree! Yes.

Children should die!

Read Post

Norman:

Posted May 18, 2005 | 04:49 PM (EST)


Great job on The Executioner's Song!

It used to be on my Friendster profile of favorite books, but then due to a glitch in their set-up Friendster erased it :(

Will be back up there soon tho, thanx for a great read.

CUL8R NM!

Read Post

Hey Jonah

Posted May 17, 2005 | 03:29 AM (EST)


Nice post with the Bolton video. I can't believe the there's a cameo in there by the guy who said "I ate his liver with some fava beans and a nice chianti." What's his name....oh yeah: Erskine Childers.

desk.jpg

Read Post

GORGEOUS PETITION!

Posted May 12, 2005 | 03:19 AM (EST)


This save-our-trees petition had an urgent tone and enchanting, sun-dappled forest background. So I took political action via email. I always feel a little guilty doing this when I don't take the time to research the cause or understand the issues or "care a bunch" but I do...

Read Post

DAN-NY! DAN-NY! DAN-NY!

Posted May 10, 2005 | 03:08 AM (EST)


huffington.jpg

Thanks to the internet, we know little Danny Stricker interviewed Arianna Huffington in 2001 and was 2003's "TIME for Kids" reporter. We also know that at some point (probably around '93) he read Cirque du Freak II.

But where is...

Read Post