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Chez Pazienza

Chez Pazienza

Posted: December 23, 2008 11:36 AM

An Open Letter to the American Media Regarding the Duggar Family


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Dear Media,

I'm writing today to issue a plea on behalf of the sane, reasonably well-adjusted people all across this country of ours. It's, admittedly, a move borne out of desperation and spawned from the mind of someone who's been pushed to the brink of madness, but I would only hope that this fact underscores the anguish being felt by the American people and therefore the seriousness of what I'm about to say.

Please, in the name of all that's decent, stop, stop, stop treating the Duggars like they're celebrities.

Yesterday morning, like clockwork, the Duggar family -- Jim Bob, Michelle, her clown car vagina, and the 18 kids whose names all inexplicably begin with the letter "J" -- made their traditional appearance on NBC's Today to show off the latest addition to their constantly expanding litter. As always, they basked in the glow of the national media spotlight, were treated to oodles of warm encomia, and took the opportunity to joyfully drop the name of the Lord every few seconds like there was some kind of Skinner Box treat in it for them.

The Today show has become something akin to the official press secretariat of the Duggars -- excitedly fawning over each birth and the fresh pregnancy announcement that invariably, immediately follows it as if this information were something that actually mattered to anyone. But, obviously, Today isn't alone in its cultural elevation of the Duggars from crazy homemade cult to all-American heroes.

And make no mistake -- these people are indeed crazy.

Completely out of their fucking minds.

You know something, though? That's okay. They're entitled to live their lives however the hell they want, as long as none of their kids -- born an average of one a year since 1988 -- ends up on welfare and we the taxpayers have to foot the bill for little Jolene or Jonah. I honestly couldn't care less that there's an insane family living in Arkansas cranking out children because God says so. The problem is that you, the media -- NBC, ABC, TLC, etc. -- keep giving these people face time, thereby convincing them that everyone in this country not crazier than they are actually loves hearing the latest news about Michelle Duggar's overworked reproductive system. I'm not suggesting that you're encouraging them -- since you couldn't, as they take their cues from a supposedly higher authority -- but you are giving them the chance to hawk their books, TV show and the assorted other crap that allows them to afford to continue spitting out kids like chocolates coming down a conveyor belt. These people shouldn't be cast in a positive light. They shouldn't be cast in any light at all. If they want to keep trying to single-handedly overpopulate the Earth for Jesus, they should have to pay for it without the help of your unwarranted free publicity, media.

Let's see how long they'd last once the gravy train you guys happily play conductor of dries up.

Like Paris Hilton, whose career you're also guilty of perpetuating and foisting on an exhausted public, the Duggars are famous only for their unusual sexual habits.

And like Paris Hilton, they've never deserved the wealth of attention you've lavished on them. They're religious zealots who won't stop having babies. That's it. Nothing more.

So once again, knock it the hell off. Stop shoving this family down our collective throat.

If the Duggars one day make the announcement that they've decided to start using contraception, or if one of their kids comes out with horns or something, feel free to give them a couple minutes of airtime. Until then, remember that you're the mainstream media -- not Procreation Quarterly and not a carnival barker.

Cool?

Thanks and Happy Holidays,

Chez

Follow Chez Pazienza on Twitter: www.twitter.com/chezpazienza

Dear Media, I'm writing today to issue a plea on behalf of the sane, reasonably well-adjusted people all across this country of ours. It's, admittedly, a move borne out of desperation and spawned fro...
Dear Media, I'm writing today to issue a plea on behalf of the sane, reasonably well-adjusted people all across this country of ours. It's, admittedly, a move borne out of desperation and spawned fro...
 
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01:31 AM on 12/29/2008
If find this family and other too-large families to be just gross. There must be potty chairs and diaper pails everywhere that must be so embarrassi­ng for the teens in the family. And all of this is just because a couple cannot control themselves or use a method. To think that a lot of the problems in the world could be solved by a little pill that Michelle refuses to take.
03:31 PM on 12/29/2008
"Too large" can "gross" by who's standards?
05:49 PM on 12/29/2008
If you don't like it, don't watch. This is really their business and if The Today Show wants them on, they must have an audience for it.
12:26 AM on 12/29/2008
Chill out and change the channel Chez...
02:20 PM on 12/28/2008
In my opinion the Duggars are among the most selfish, narcissist­ic people on the planet (the parents, I mean. I don't blame the kids). With the world getting more polluted by the minute, with the U.S. consuming the world's resources at a rate that far exceeds most of the rest of the world, why are these people being celebrated for their reproducti­ve excessiven­ess? I agree, the media needs to stop subsidizin­g these people.
03:33 PM on 12/29/2008
Are you the population police? You don't have to watch it - turn the channel.
08:53 AM on 12/28/2008
Whoa! That open letter is awesome. Different strokes for different folks...my husband and I are stopping after one kid (and people call us weirdos too.) But, even if you are into large families and don't concern yourself with how to educate them and prepare them for the world too much...wha­t is wrong with stopping at 5 or 6...or 7...or 8...or...j­eez -- the list could go on and on, couldn't it? These people are just too much.

It makes me think they keep doing it because it is their marketing plan for life. "We're the big Christian Waltons type family that America loves so much!" They got onto this baby making thing originally because the evangelica­l churches preach that kids equal "abundance­" and that women were put on this earth to do very little outside of getting pregnant and raising kids. After awhile, they saw they were getting a lot of attention and/or monetary gifts and compensati­on for their lifestyle. The only way to keep it going? Keep cranking out the little Duggars. Very creepy.
09:26 PM on 12/26/2008
I signed up here just so I could log on and say thank you! Seriously, since when should people go on national television and brag about helping to further overpopula­te the earth? Regardless of whether or not any of them ever end up being an economic drain to society, the carbon footprint alone makes me wonder why they don't hide in shame.
03:51 PM on 12/27/2008
Yeah, the carbon footprint really bothers me. Imagine how much they are using in paper products, diapers, formula and packaging (she cannot be breastfeed­ing if she is getting pg that often) and gas they are using. I would like to see them be more green. I feel like I have taht obligation with the 3 children I have.
03:34 PM on 12/29/2008
You have the right "to feel that obligation­" and the Duggards have the right to feel their own.
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JoyceBains
06:33 PM on 12/26/2008
*stands up and applauds*

I'm so sick of their fans going on and on about how they don't have any debt and don't take any handouts when in reality, they exist on handouts and subsidize their lifestyle by being paraded around like a carnival attraction - luxuries they are afforded SOLELY because they are white and Christian.
03:35 PM on 12/29/2008
You are wrong they are debt free without the money they get from their TV appearance­s. Prove to me that they get it "solely because they are white".
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jalowe1957
Poisonous epitaphs dished out periodically.
12:39 PM on 12/26/2008
May I have some smelling salts, please.
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ebanks84
Grandma knows best!
11:17 AM on 12/26/2008
Thank you for this article. Some folks (and we know who) are encouraged to have as many babies as possible while others are NOT.

I WONDER WHY?
08:35 AM on 12/28/2008
Because that is what America's about. Do you want to put a limit on how many children a family can have? Why don't we start with poor people who can't afford the children they have?
11:06 PM on 12/29/2008
Maybe we should. Planned Parenthood has gift certificat­es, I am sure some people appreciate them. If poor women could get proper health care, they might not have as many babies.
11:11 AM on 12/26/2008
How small of you, I for one enjoy celebratio­ns of family, there are all types of families in America. Large, small, one parent, two parents, 2 moms, 2 dads, Sibling headed homes, Grandparen­ts raising grandkids, etc...., families like the Duggars weren't uncommon 60 years ago and I think it's courageous and commendabl­e that they are committed to family, it works for them and we shouldn't judge. These days if a woman has that many children, generally they are not by the same father and there is a strong possibilit­y that she is a substance abuser. Our strong families are a part of the backbone of our country.
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Motherunit
03:30 PM on 12/26/2008
"families like the Duggars weren't uncommon 60 years ago"
I gotta disagee that part of your statement. I would say more like 4-5 kids were not uncommon. 8-10 kids, even back then, was considered a remarkably large family. Mothers may not have had reliable birth control available to them, but they also had shorter life expectanci­es and tended to reach menopause earlier. Infant mortality was higher, and the mothers had a higher chance of a problem pregnancy and/or dying in childbirth­.
I can't begin to fathom what would motivate a woman to want to spend most of her adult life pregnant. If Mrs Duggar, bless her heart, wants to keep having babies, that's her choice. But 18 kids, then and now, is uncommon.
11:55 AM on 12/27/2008
I can't begin to fathom what would motivate a woman to want to spend most of her adult life pregnant.

It's her genetic destiny.Qu­ite frankly she has no other purpose on this earth.The term to describe such women 40 years ago was "pathologi­cal breeders".
12:46 AM on 12/28/2008
According to the American Almanac, though only 5 percent of the world’s population­, Americans consume 26 percent of the world’s energy.  A single person in North America consumes as much as 30 or 40 people in a typical third world country. T­he United Nations estimates that the human population­, currently at 6.5 billion, is well on its way to 9.2 billion in 2050.
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Retrofuturistic
see things as they really are
10:46 AM on 12/26/2008
Ha. Thank you for saying that. I wanted to say it myself, but I couldn't get over the vomitaciou­sness of it all.
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knosiswar
Major General Smedley Butler - get to know him
10:11 AM on 12/26/2008
Carnival Barkers is exactly what they are.

Thanks to Murdoch, FOX, and where our culture took the wrong turn with the FOX show COPS, we are a low brow, tabloid society. Much like before the fall of Rome, they paint propaganda pictures for us and the religious idiots jump on the band wagon of intolleran­ce and blame the ills of society on the things they cannot comprehend­, taking comfort in their own self-right­ousness ignorance.
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DomainDiva
Aviation SaaS Entrepreneur and Technical SME
09:46 AM on 12/26/2008
Thank you Chez. Speaking for the rest of you are..... ;)
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GravitonX
10^300 bosons could care less.
09:40 AM on 12/26/2008
Imagine if this was a Black family or a Latin family...

You could just hear the comments.

Which goes to my point...po­pulation control only applies to non-whites­. Keep that in mind whenever you hear these (white) right-wing­ers or "liberal" family planners.
11:51 AM on 12/26/2008
"You could just hear the comments."

But you've yet to read them. They're overwhelmi­ngly negative.
08:30 AM on 12/26/2008
Lot's of talk about overpopula­tion and the environmen­t in these posts. This is not a concern for evangelica­ls because they believe in the Rapture. I have a friend who was traumatize­d as a child by his parents beliefs. Whenever he lost sight of his mom at the mall he thought the Rapture has occurred and his mom was taken up while he was left behind. I call this child abuse.
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Motherunit
08:49 AM on 12/26/2008
Religion can be scary for kids. I spent a large portion of my childhood in terror, thanks to the nuns. It seemed like just about anything I did, said, or thought would send me staight to h e l l. There were so many sins, so many ways to offend. Nuns in junior high tried to tell me that coloring my hair & tweezing my eyebows were sins, but by that time I had learned to take them with a grain of salt. I still get a little skittish when I hear beads rattling, though.
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Dannydel
10:12 AM on 12/26/2008
My favorite priest while I was growing up is now tending to his flock of fellow prisoners at Walpole State Prison in Mass.
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07:10 PM on 12/26/2008
I was told as a child umpteen times I was going to hell, especially by reichwinge­rs of other churches when I visited their dadgum church! lol
also, was told in church as a 6 yr old that "church is not a social hour and if you turn around and look to see which one of your friends is coming in you will turn to sand like Lot's wife.

Also, as a 6 yr old that if I bent my fingers when praying instead of pointing them that Satan was sitting on them omg no wonder people seek spirituali­ty instead of religion as they become adults
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deschl
07:47 AM on 12/26/2008
well said