I'm going to try to get this over with as quickly as possible, mostly because I've done my best to avoid writing about either of these people for a long time and so far have been mercifully successful.
The whole Controversy over Sharon Osbourne calling Susan Boyle a "hairy arsehole" who looks like she's been beaten with an "ugly stick" is completely ridiculous.
Thursday, in a move that had been predestined since about three seconds after the offending comment, Osbourne apologized to Boyle -- and by proxy everyone else on the planet, all of whom had taken it upon themselves to demand repentance -- for being so callous and insensitive during an appearance on The Opie and Anthony Show on Sirius XM (a radio show that's raised callous-and-insensitive to an art form). In the week since Osbourne made the on-air crack, you honestly would've thought that she'd driven her Bentley to Susan Boyle's house and taken a crap on her front lawn; the amount of contrived outrage from both the slavish celebrity media and the lifeless dolts who eat that kind of nonsense up has been hilariously deafening.
It really should go without saying, first and foremost, that Opie and Anthony do a comedy show; if you've never listened to it, trust me when I tell you that somebody calling somebody else a hairy asshole is probably the least offensive thing you'll hear on that show on any given day. The fact that people can't take a joke, a rude one, sure, but still a joke -- and most poignantly, one that wasn't really aimed at their tender ears in the first place and was only brought to their attention by a mass media machine that makes its living off of those who are constantly on the lookout for something to be outraged over -- is as hell of a lot more offensive in my mind than the joke itself.
But beyond that, the outpouring of indignation -- the shock and anger over a comment from a woman who's not exactly known for being classy or tactful, directed at a supposedly defenseless wallflower -- isn't just absurd, it's disingenuous. The reality is that Susan Boyle is unattractive. She's really unattractive. And guess what? The event that catapulted her to stardom in the first place capitalized on the fact that just about anyone who sees her believes this. When Susan Boyle stepped out onto the stage on Britain's Got Talent, you were supposed to think that she was an ugly, overweight frump who was doomed to embarrass herself in spectacular fashion the minute she opened her mouth. For God's sake, they practically played the Baby Elephant Walk from Hatari as her intro music. That moment, which became a cultural phenomenon, was all about the juxtaposition of her very impressive voice with her anything-but-impressive looks; the show's producers engineered it to shame the audience they knew would make an instant assumption: that somebody who looked like that couldn't possibly be talented -- not somebody that ugly.
People don't respond well to being forced to face the rottenest parts of their character -- like, say, the part that snickered when it first saw dowdy, awkward Susan Boyle and heard that she had dreams of being a successful singer -- and they usually respond by overcompensating in the opposite direction. Hence, you get thousands of people commenting on celebrity news websites or penning impassioned diatribes calling Sharon Osbourne "the one who's TRULY ugly" and making the obligatory knee-jerk demand that she be fired (from what exactly? Britain's Got Talent? America's Got Talent? Her job as Ozzy's manager?). Or how about this -- to really prove to themselves that they're good people, enlightened beings above petty prejudices, 68% percent of those who took part in a poll earlier this week by Access Hollywood engaged in the pop culture equivalent of voting for the mentally disabled kid for prom king: They proudly declared that when compared with Sharon Osbourne, Susan Boyle had more "sex appeal."
Think about that for a minute.
68% of those who watch Access Hollywood -- a show hosted by a couple of living Barbie and Ken dolls with hardly a brain cell between them, a show that traffics in gossip about the lives of the most gorgeous people in the world -- believe that Susan Boyle has much more sex appeal than Sharon Osbourne.
Right.
What does that poll really tell us? It tells us that it's not even that so many in this country can't take a joke, it's that so many would rather lie, even to themselves, than admit that they're nowhere near as evolved as they pretend to be. That although she may have been crude about it, Sharon Osbourne wasn't saying anything millions of people weren't already thinking.
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We must continue our efforts to fight the HIV virus. But we must also continue to fight the equally dangerous, infectious, and deadly epidemic of apathy.
I understand the superficiality of men regarding a woman's appearance. They are biologically hard-wired to respond that way -- unless trained to restrain blurting their hurtful first impression by good parents.
However, I don't get Sharon. Not only is she a woman who most certainly has experienced
negative comments about her appearance (she was quite obese at one time), she is also the mother of a daughter who has battled a very fragile self-image. Her statement was the very callous and cruel act of a woman who should have deep empathy for another woman's struggle for confidence and self-acceptance.
http://www.asstr.org/~Bradley_Stoke/images/SarahVaughanBeauty.jpg
Beautiful!
What has struck me about Susan Boyle is not that she's an amazing singer: She's not. She is just much better than people expected her to be when she stepped onto the stage looking the way she does.
She's pretty good. Better than a lot of people. But not as great as she is being made out to be.
I think people should be given credit where credit is due, but not overcompensated.
And, as my mom always said, calling someone a name doesn't make them look bad. It makes you look bad. Even as a joke.
And, last of my questions: can't you imagine someone to whom someone else's appearance appears to be "beautiful", no matter how they "look"? Seems to happen a lot with people in love.... Just asking.
I was watching Ms. Boyle's facial expressions and thinking how sweet she looked. And I cheered her on. I knew that it had been set up by the producers, especially after Simon "winced" when he saw her. What'shisname rolled his eyes. At that moment I knew 1. It was a setup 2. She was going to knock our socks off!
I wish her all of the success she so richly deserves. I wonder if eventually Ms. Boyle will be able to buy and sell Mr. Chez?
I think so! You go, woman, you go!
MAN, we're getting to be a gossipy, catty crowd in this country! MEOW!!
This reads like a Bad post.
What's wrong?Were you having a bad hair day when you wrote it or were you just really hungry?
99% of this Planet could easily qualify as Susan's ugly, and the remaining 1% could qualify as Sharon's ugly: the not at all "classy" or "tactful" - or anything nice for that matter.
You should have continued to listen to your instinct & avoided writing about these 2!
Go get some good sleep. Yea, we still love you.
That being said. There are some "absolutes" in how humans react either positively or negatively to appearance. Symmetry is powerful, and so is conditioning. Susan Boyle is not Angelina Jolie, nor is she Bela Abzug. She looks like many women her age, and from the region of her country of origin. She's not ugly, but then, modern western society has a very skewed and manipulated idea of what "should" be "beautiful". Women "of a certain age" find themselves invisible. Women who do not fit the current status quo also find themselves either invisible or subject to ridicule. We seem to have a problem with thinking that a person who sings as beautifully as Susan does, should look a certain way, not the way she looks. Talent and "conventional" beauty do not always go hand in hand. Ms. "almost beauty queen" Prejean comes to mind...she fits the bill for "conventional" beauty: vaselined shiny teeth/caps, dyed blond hair, silly-cones, and all the talent of a block of wood.
I knew a woman with a gorgeous operatic coloratura voice when I was in college. She was frequently selected to audition for contests after submitting tapes of her performances, but won only once. She was short and stocky; not fat, not ugly, but didn't resemble the statuesque singers that the Met likes to parade on stage. I thought it was criminal then, and I feel little differently about it now.
surface is all you will get.