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Christina Pesoli
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Christina Pesoli is the author of Break Free From the Divortex: Power Through Your Divorce and Launch Your New Life and founder of Emotional Hardbody where she provides training to help women avoid common mistakes that make divorce take longer and cost more. Her essays have appeared in a variety of publications. She is a proud native Austinite, and an even prouder mother of two.

Entries by Christina Pesoli

Sadness: You're Doing It Wrong (Why I'm Mad at Crying)

(2) Comments | Posted July 16, 2014 | 11:22 AM

If you don't cry when you're sad, you're apparently doing it wrong. Crying has become the "it" emotional response. No longer is it viewed as one of many healthy ways to process sadness; it is the only acceptable way. And on top of that, it's mandatory.

I understand how...

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The Key to Avoiding a Vacation From Hell? Don't Book One There

(0) Comments | Posted July 7, 2014 | 5:10 PM

So, you want to go on vacation. You've already figured out who's going, but you still haven't decided where. In case you're thinking, "It doesn't really matter where we go, as long as I'm with people I love," keep reading because I'm about to totally save your vacation.


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Tired of Being Asked Nosy Questions? _____ Yes _____ No (Why Marital Status Question Doesn't Belong on Forms)

(0) Comments | Posted June 13, 2014 | 1:33 PM

I come across the following question on forms all the time:

Marital status:

____ Single ____ Married ____ Separated ____ Divorced ____ Widowed ____ Other

And it really, really bugs me. I've always felt this question overstepped its boundaries. But since getting a divorce, it has gone from...

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My Daughter Might Have Worn Inappropriate Shoes to Middle School Graduation (But the World Did NOT Come to an End)

(1) Comments | Posted June 4, 2014 | 2:38 PM

The first time I saw the shoes my 13-year old daughter Hannah wanted to wear to middle school graduation, I flat out refused to buy them for her. Frankly, I was astounded that she was asking for them with a straight face. I mean, they had four-inch heels! I informed...

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Co-parenting Tip of the Day: Don't Give Spineless Support

(0) Comments | Posted May 23, 2014 | 1:41 PM

Let's play a game of make believe:

Imagine you get a call from your ex wife. She tells you that your 15-year old daughter, Natalie, has been invited to a party/sleepover at another friend's house. The party is on a weekend that Natalie will be with you. Both the party...

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What Winston Churchill and Refrigerator Magnets Can Teach You About Getting Through Your Divorce

(0) Comments | Posted May 16, 2014 | 1:56 PM

I usually don't care for the magnets at Whole Foods. The messages are typically 100 percent healthy and 0 percent funny, and that combination just doesn't resonate with me. The all-important snark-to-inspiration ratio is way off. I prefer magnets that say things like, "Mommy knows best. That's why she left...

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Have You Been Asked to Give a Commencement Address? This Cheat Sheet Will Help You Nail It!

(0) Comments | Posted May 13, 2014 | 4:25 PM

So, you've been asked to give a commencement address. Congratulations! That's quite an honor. But whatever you do, don't let it go to your head. There are lots of ways commencement speakers can (and have) gone wrong. And although mistakes often make the best teachers -- you don't need to...

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A Special Message to the 2014 Graduates of the School of Divorce

(0) Comments | Posted May 6, 2014 | 11:09 AM

It's commencement season and you know what that means. You have to sit through a bunch of long, boring speeches about what life is really all about. Don't worry. I'm not going to do that to you. You've been through enough to get where you are today. You're eager to...

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100 Percent Mid-Century, Zero Percent Modern: Phyllis Schlafly's Not-So-Secret Formula For Keeping Women Disempowered

(0) Comments | Posted May 1, 2014 | 12:04 PM

Recently, Phyllis Schlafly emerged from her 1950s time capsule with both hot glue guns blazing. She took aim at the issue of income inequality and the proposed legislation to address the problem. The more I read Schlafly's articles, the more I felt like I was reading a guide...

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Equal! Equal! Read All About it! Why Equal Pay Is Better Than Newspaper Headlines

(2) Comments | Posted April 11, 2014 | 11:13 AM

In the media coverage following last week's tragedy at Fort Hood, many of the stories focused on the fact that a woman police officer played a key role in stopping the shooting rampage. Headlines ranged from, "Fort Hood: Four Dead, 16 Hurt, and a Female Cop Who Ended...

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Why Susan Patton's Advice to Get a "MRS Degree" Is As Wrong As Her Math

(0) Comments | Posted April 2, 2014 | 4:15 PM

Move over, Ted Cruz. When it comes to living proof that an Ivy League education does not prevent a person from being an ego-fueled blowhard with out-of-touch ideas that endanger society, you are no longer the poster child du jour.

Meet Susan Patton. She's the Princeton "educated" empty nester...

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Conscious Comedy: The Dos and Don'ts of Mindfully Mocking Gwyneth Paltrow's 'Conscious Uncoupling'

(2) Comments | Posted March 31, 2014 | 4:45 PM

Poking fun at Gwyneth Paltrow has never been hard. She is a little out of touch, a lot uptight, and completely lovely all at the same time. And thanks to the announcement that she and husband Chris Martin are "consciously uncoupling," mocking her has never been easier. But...

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Membership Has Its Perils: One Sorority You Should Never Join (But Might Be In Already)

(8) Comments | Posted March 24, 2014 | 8:42 AM

Molly* was a pediatrician who loved her job. In her off hours, she competed in triathlons. But at 37 years old, Molly had never been married. In fact, she hadn't had a relationship that had lasted for more than a year since graduating from medical school. Molly owned a house,...

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Fashion Wrongs: 'Career Ready' Ad Proves Nordstrom is Overdue for a Marketing Makeover

(3) Comments | Posted March 18, 2014 | 5:06 PM

This week, I got an email from Nordstrom. The subject line read "Career-Ready Style Starting at $68." The price caught my eye, so I opened the email. I found myself staring at a photo of three young women who, but for their stylish attire and a couple of random accessories...

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Winners and Losers: Emotional Hardbody's 2014 Buffy and Bonehead Awards

(0) Comments | Posted February 24, 2014 | 1:19 PM

It's the moment you've all been waiting for! No, not the Academy Award winners, but the Emotional Hardbody Buffy and Bonehead Awards!

Buffy Awards are granted to Hollywood types who portray the values and characteristics that are at the core of being an Emotional Hardbody, such as tenacity,...

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#Unbelievable: Mattel and 'Sports Illustrated' Team Up to Tackle Untapped Markets

(0) Comments | Posted February 13, 2014 | 11:14 PM

For decades Mattel has tried to convince conscientious moms that Barbie is a constructive toy for their young daughters rather than a time-released formula for body, self-esteem and priority issues that will spring into action in their tweens and haunt them for a lifetime.

But Mattel is now signaling...

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Why I Love the 'F' Word: How Having a Daughter Changed My Language and My Life

(0) Comments | Posted February 11, 2014 | 2:54 PM

I used to never use the "F" word. This was back in the 1990s, when I cared more about respecting social norms. I was a new-ish lawyer working at a big law firm, and I wanted to fit in. It wasn't like lady lawyers were unheard of, but they certainly...

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Taking One for the Team: Why My Valentine's Day Is Going to Totally Suck (and Yet I'm Okay With That)

(0) Comments | Posted February 11, 2014 | 11:20 AM

If you're a woman going through a divorce, chances are you're not thrilled to have Valentine's Day looming large at the end of the week. From now until Friday, it's going to be wall-to-wall ads for florists, jewelry stores, and naughty love toys every time you turn on the radio...

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Why You're Every Bit as Awesome as Chocolate Chip Cookies!

(0) Comments | Posted February 7, 2014 | 2:56 PM

If you're like a lot of women, you feel like a failure over your divorce. And if you're like a lot of women, you like chocolate chip cookies. As fate would have it, the cure for feeling like a failure is chocolate chip cookies! And no, I'm not suggesting you...

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In Heroic Move, Coke Sacrifices Itself, Saves Country From Obesity

(37) Comments | Posted February 3, 2014 | 9:55 AM

It's a new day in America. If someone had told me yesterday that I would be lauding Coke for being a selfless corporate citizen, I never would have believed it. But Coke's Super Bowl ad wasn't just another predictable and forgettable TV spot pitching a crappy product. It...

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