Unlike many Americans, I believe Kim Kardashian did the right thing divorcing Kris Humphries after 72 days. Despite the fact that the Clue Phone was ringing off the hook before she walked down the aisle, she didn't pick it up and listen.
I didn't either.
I grew up in Los Angeles and moved to Minneapolis for love, after buying a parka and learning the new lingo ("Ya sure, you betcha!"). I can see why Kim described us as the "Yee Haw" state.
My first marriage lasted 29 years. The rebound marriage? Less than four. The Clue Phone was ringing the entire time. I just chose not to answer it.
Like Kim's, my second marriage happened quickly. On our first official date, he asked me to marry him, and I said, "Yes." Who knows why I agreed to marry a man I barely knew? Perhaps because I still believed in love at first sight; after all, that's what had happened with my first husband. I was used to being a wife, and couldn't imagine dating in my 50's; I'd been out of practice for so long.
Kim didn't have the fear of aging looming in her face. But she, too, said "Yes," before she really knew who Kris was or if they'd even be compatible.
Perhaps Kim, like me, was swept up in the fantasy of her "Mr. Wonderful." The NBA is a powerful attraction, and her sister Khloe' had set the tone by marrying Los Angeles Lakers forward Lamar Odom in 2009.
Unlike Kim, who realized after 72 days that it wasn't going to work, I gave my second marriage the good 'ole Minnesota try. I wish I'd had her courage to end my marriage as quickly. My second marriage took me down a path I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy. It included domestic violence and a broken nose, his severe alcoholism, my loss of identity. But thanks to time, introspection and some therapy, I see that I have no one to blame but myself. All the "clues" were there; I just chose to ignore them.
I'm sure the Clue Phone was ringing for Kim, too. But even when we believe something's wrong, we ignore the Clue Phone for a whole variety of reasons. In Kim's case, maybe it was the pressure of the media, or her family, or her wedding's size and $10M price tag. That probably proved too much in the beginning for her to stop and say, "I've made a mistake," and move on.
She, like me, could have been thinking, "Well, maybe after we get married, everything will be alright."
Kris sure seems like a nice Minnesota boy: wholesome, sincere, successful. But we really don't know what a person's true personality is until we've lived together. Those nasty quirks, habits and mannerisms that didn't show up during courtship when they're on their best behavior can drive you crazy when you're waking up every day in the same bed.
Who knows what the final clues were that led Kim to make this tough decision? Perhaps it was the fact that he was five years younger than her. Maybe her ring just wasn't big enough. His close relationship with his family may have been an issue. Or maybe it was simply because she didn't want to move to Minnesota after all. It won't be easy reading all the gossip, hearing people talk behind her back, coming to grips with another failed marriage.
But whatever her reasons -- which we may never know -- Kim finally heard the Clue Phone and decided it was time to move on. And ya sure, you betcha, I think it was a good decision.
Christine Clifford is a best-selling Minneapolis-based author who has just published The Clue Phone's Ringing... It's for You! Healing Humor for Women Divorcing. She is also CEO and President of Divorcing Divas, LLC .