How Do You Handle Compliments ?

04/19/2013 04:11 pm ET | Updated Jun 19, 2013


I think you know the feeling. You get a compliment, and in many ways, you can't embrace it. And before you know it, you find yourself returning the compliment. In a variation of "That was nothing," or "You are amazing too."

Compliments are a positive and nurturing energy that we grow from. If we, for various reasons, experience problems with receiving and growing, then we can't embrace the nurturing flow. And we end up returning the recognition.

It can feel unsafe and vulnerable to receive compliments and take them to heart. If we quickly return the energy, we can stay in our comfort zone and we obstruct the intimate and heart-opening growth before us.

Many of us long for more recognition especially because we rarely recognize ourselves. Therefore, we often end up with the upper limit of avoiding compliments.

We must be able to take the uplifting energy in. It's really about making room for success, and growing from the loving appreciation.

Sometimes, I take a deep breath and bathe a little in the positive light. I play with the moment and enlarge it instead of sabotaging it. And then I thank the person who took the time to compliment me.

It's never nice to give compliments that are not received. We disturb the joy of giving when we refuse to receive.

We really don't need to go beyond thank you. The more we talk, the more we sabotage our ability to receive not to mention the intimacy that comes with the interaction.

The intimacy is the thing that scares us the most -- including the vulnerability it opens us up to. And that's also the thing we long the most for.

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