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Shit My Dad Smokes

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I've just read that the Parents Television Council is threatening CBS's affiliates with a challenge to their broadcast licenses over the TV show based on the well-known Twitter/Facebook sensation, Shit My Dad Says, according to a report in the Hollywood Reporter.

Is it just me, or is this overwrought indignation about "bad words" a close parallel to the nation's war on marijuana -- albeit without the non-violent victims doing time in prison?

First off, we've got the comically conflicted position of the political/cultural right: the same people who say they want to abolish the "granny state" squawk and scold and clamor for the right to wash our mouths out with soap if we utter even the mildest of profanities.

Then there's the innocuous innocence of the offending word/substance. Our last three presidents (and Al Gore) have publicly admitted to having smoked grass -- with no apparent ill effects on them or their careers. Presumably, none of them would call the cops if they found their own children in possession of a few joints. Given that the sorts of people who go on to leadership positions in government and business have been trying/smoking pot for the past four decades, it's a good bet many American's parents have listened to the Doobie Brothers, if you know what I mean (if not, ask your parents). Yet here we are in 2010, still debating whether to legalize personal use among consenting adults.

Even worse, the federal government has drafted guidelines that would make it illegal to drive with any metabolites of marijuana present in the bloodstream. To be clear, the cognitive/motor effects of smoking a joint may last a few hours, at most, but the metabolites can linger in the body at detectable levels for weeks or months. So were I to smoke a joint today in Spain (where I live, and it's legal), then fly to LA to visit my parents in a week or two, it would be illegal for me to drive! Seriously.

Add to all this the blind hypocrisy and/or ignorance necessary to maintain outrage at adult marijuana use while quietly accepting skyrocketing quantities of Ritalin and anti-depressants prescribed to kids in the U.S., the contamination of the food supply with antibiotics and growth hormones, and the constant flood of pesticides into the water supply. Pay no attention to the circular insanity of pesticide residues in children apparently leading to increased rates of ADHD which leads to Ritalin prescription ...

This is like still getting all worked up over "shit" without raising a peep as "sucks" slips ever deeper into mainstream use. Remember when you could get into trouble for saying that something or someone "sucks"? Not anymore. Gizmodo.com's recent review of the iPad is unashamedly titled: 8 Things That Suck About the iPad. A few years ago, Seth Stevenson wrote a spirited defense of "suck" at Slate.com, where he argued that the Parents Television Council's goal of preventing "bad" words from seeping into the linguistic mainstream is essentially impossible and misguided.

Sucks to be them.

 

Follow Christopher Ryan on Twitter: www.twitter.com/sexatdawn

 
 
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11:16 AM on 05/27/2010
Oil destroying the gulf of Mexico, American troops murdering innocent Iraqis and afghans, swat teams killing dogs during a raid on a wrong address, these things are perfectly acceptable for our children to see, these images are not offensive. Say 'shit'? Now that is unacceptable. Americans are the most hypocritical group of people ever assembled on the face of earth. Oh wait, there's that organization in Vatican City.........never mind.
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
alkamm
Brevity is the soul of lingerie.
11:05 AM on 05/25/2010
These little religious groups like Parent's and the movie rating system focus groupers need to be more free market oriented. No one should pay any attention to their tired ethics.

And yes, consensual crimes like trafficking in weed is a lot like trafficking in "bad" words. Every time I see someone's mouth pixellated for saying one of the words George Carlin illuminated, I wonder about our freedoms. Or when a breast exposure is grounds for a big fine. These are fatwahs, and the fundamentalists who issue them have way too much power.
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wayoutleft
my nano-bio coded in a period: .
03:12 AM on 05/25/2010
you'd better not be too stoned to find your birth certificate as well as pee holy water.
08:18 PM on 05/24/2010
Excellent point about the hypocrisy on health issues. How can a country accept rocket fuel in breast milk, while arresting people for smoking pot at a 4th of July celebration?

http://www.kellymom.com/health/chemical/perchlorate-breastmilk.html
06:42 PM on 05/24/2010
It is odd that "shit" is considered offensive, when "crap" or "manure" or even "feces" all refer to the same stuff. However, the writer presumably named it "Shit My Dad Says" instead of "Weird Stuff My Dad Says" specifically, and only, because the word still is more interesting and provocative than its less-offensive synonyms.
HUFFPOST COMMUNITY MODERATOR
GeorgeBurnsWasRight
My micro-bio is running on empty.
06:09 PM on 05/24/2010
"Yet here we are in 2010, still debating whether to legalize personal [marijuana] use among consenting adults."

Wish we were. Our last 3 presidents may have smoked, but none of them would have been elected if they had advocated decriminalization. A majority of the public still supports the so-called "War on Drugs" which has arguably been more costly and produced more collateral damage than all of the numerous real wars we have fought during the same time period.

Apparently a lot of voters think the world would be a better place if they had been thrown in jail at some point in their lives. The best we can manage are a few "fig-leaf" medical marijuana programs in a few states which don't override federal laws.

Of course, if you think American's views and laws on drugs and swearing are stupid, they're nothing compared to what Americans think and do about sex.
03:17 PM on 06/18/2010
well stated.
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DudeinHammock
04:25 PM on 05/24/2010
Somewhat ironically, I see that the editors have now changed the title of this piece to "S#! My Dad Smokes" on the front page after about six hours up.
03:02 PM on 05/24/2010
The level of dysfunction in American society has approached catastrophic levels.

We can't accomplish big things or solve big problems any more.

We work ourselves into frenzies over the "S" word and a few harmless joints, while we continue to drug ourselves sick and stupid with poisonous prescription medication, which only has the cumulative effect of making us more compliant and less spry...all the better for the corporations to continue taking advantage of us.

This is a very dangerous time for our country, folks.
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Rogan
06:45 AM on 05/25/2010
Wait a second... is that why I'm getting less spry, lately? The drugs...?
11:53 AM on 05/24/2010
Great article and a good laugh;considering that s-h-i-t is merely an acronym for Ship High In Transit. Which referred to manure. Which is really shit. So-o-o...that means we can't say "manure" either? I'm confused,and not from smoking too much shit!
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DudeinHammock
11:58 AM on 05/24/2010
Good point. I'd forgotten about that. I'm wondering how they're going to handle "words" like WTF? Can they ban non-word collections of letters? Seems the censors are up shit creek, as they say.
12:12 PM on 05/24/2010
No shit!

I'm not sure if the late Mr. Carlin hit it with "The 7 Words..." completely. That bit was before the point you brought up occurred. Is "WTF" in the dictionary yet? What about "effin'",the new substitute for the F-bomb? Curious debate,this. Congress should form a committee...