Over-The-Counter ED Drugs Considered

When you get older, things don't always work perfectly. Usually they work fine, but taking one of these pills is sort of like a tune-up for an old car that still runs but could use a tune-up. Nothing to be embarrassed about. You're just an old car. A classic car.
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It's quasi-official:

What this will mean:

A percentage of women over 50 will be ecstatic, thrilled, let's spike his beer, finally he'll have no excuses, I thought my life was over but it's just beginning, I won't have to work so hard -- I can just lay there and enjoy myself instead of knocking myself out until I'm too tired to care, how many can I give him?

Another percentage of women over 50 will be horrified, go into major depression, become suicidal, I thought it was finally over, keep away from me or else, these pills are NOT allowed in the house, get that thing away from me.

A percentage of men over 50 will be ecstatic, thrilled, I thought my life was over but it's just beginning, I won't have to work so hard -- I can just lay there and enjoy myself instead of knocking myself out until I'm too tired to care, how many can I take?

Another percentage of men over 50 will be horrified, go into major depression, I thought it was finally over, if she slips me any of those I'm gonna puke, just shoot me, I'm not coming near you no matter WHAT I feel like doing.

And another percentage of both men and women over 50 won't give a hoot about any of it.

One thing does have to be explained to me:

I hear twentysomethings take it. Except for medical issues, why would anybody under 50 (okay, make that 40) ever need this stuff? When you get older, things don't always work perfectly. Usually they work fine, but taking one of these pills is sort of like a tune-up for an old car that still runs but could use a tune-up. Nothing to be embarrassed about. You're just an old car. A classic car.

When I was in my 20s, the last thing I needed was a tune-up. Things ran too well. Just a poke on the pedal and I was going way past the speed limit.

And in my late teens up until I was 30 (okay, make that mid-20s), I remember being able to and/or wanting to do it four or five times a day. If these pills had been around then, would that've meant I could've done it 10 or 12 times a day? Excuse me for sounding old-fashioned and priggish, but that's a tad excessive.

If this is what kids are up to nowadays, I'm worried.

Or, I'm jealous.

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