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Claire N. Barnes, MA
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Claire N. Barnes, MA is a recognized national and international consultant who has devoted her career helping families improve their circumstances in an ever-changing, complex world. She was the Executive Director of Kids' Turn (San Francisco, CA) for thirteen years. During her tenure at Kids' Turn, she was the lead author of The Kids' Turn Way curriculum and the author of The Kids' Turn Way, Online. She facilitated replication of Kids'Turn services in Great Britain. She served on the Board of the Euro-Centric International Comission for Couples and Family Relations (ICCFR) for seven years; she was also on the Board of Governors of the San Francisco Symphony for seven years. She and her husband have currently returned to Northern Nevada where they are enjoying 'inspirement'. She represented the State of Nevada in 1996 when she carried the Olympic Torch up the Las Vegas Strip; she now serves on the Board of the Osher Lifelong Learning Institute/University Nevada, Reno and the Education Committee of the Reno Philharmonic. Find her at: www.myfavoriteteachersf.com . email her at claireperrigobarnes@gmail.com .

Entries by Claire N. Barnes, MA

Watch Your Step for Grandparents

(0) Comments | Posted August 18, 2014 | 3:35 PM

One of the major parts of our recent, relocation move has been the necessary (and pleasurable) task of hanging pictures. My husband and I love hanging pictures and as we relived travel memories, family relationships and special mementos, we practically covered the walls in our new house. That was in...

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What's Your Boomer EQ? Part 4

(1) Comments | Posted August 12, 2014 | 12:03 PM

Now that you Know Yourself, Manage Yourself and are Motivated for healthy emotions, the next big step in building your Emotional Intelligence toolkit is Understanding Others. I propose this stage is where Boomers, because of their life experience, could exceed where other people...

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What's Your Boomer EQ? Part 3

(0) Comments | Posted August 5, 2014 | 12:47 PM

Motivation! Part 3 of learning successful Emotional Intelligence (EQ) skills is affirming your motivation for healthy emotions. Motivation is what causes us to act.

Having accomplished "Part 1, Know Yourself," and Part 2, Manage Yourself, it's time to determine if you are motivated to develop better...

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What's Your Boomer EQ? Part 2

(0) Comments | Posted July 31, 2014 | 12:14 PM

On July 24, 2014, I posted Part 1 of this five part series, an online tutorial on the value of Emotional Intelligence (EQ). I propose Boomers can be effective users of EQ given their life experience and knowledge gleaned after years of interactions with others.

Enough struggling!

Having...

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What's Your Boomer EQ? Part 1

(0) Comments | Posted July 24, 2014 | 4:23 PM

Those of us Boomers who have reached the post-50 phase of life have done so anticipating a gentle transition to a reduced work schedule, retirement, travel, hobbies and quality relationships with family and friends. However, as a dear friend and colleague once counseled me, our own expectations can be the...

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Retirement Relocation Is Not for Sissies

(1) Comments | Posted May 23, 2014 | 4:16 PM

In the late 1980s, I made a significant life change which included remarriage, relocation and a career adjustment. When I landed in the new community, I expected I would ease into my professional field with ease. As an accomplished educator, I was sure the new school district would welcome me...

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What Sam Shepard Taught Me About Families

(0) Comments | Posted November 22, 2013 | 5:27 PM

As I continue my journey through retirement (aka, inspirement ) my participation in the Osher Lifelong Learning Institute (OLLI) classes available in my community also continues. OLLI programming offers affordable classes in a stimulating learning environment designed to keep members curious and engaged in active acquisition of knowledge.

I...

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Inspirement

(9) Comments | Posted October 20, 2013 | 8:01 AM

Since easing out of my position as Executive Director of a nonprofit organization, I have been extremely reluctant to apply the term 'retirement' to my new life status. I am one of those people who found the end of my full-time work life rushing toward me, rather than me rushing...

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Whose Divorce Is It, Anyway?

(6) Comments | Posted September 19, 2013 | 5:11 PM

The high divorce rate in the United States is requiring more and more boomer grandparents to be supportive of their family members if adult children divorce or separate. When this happens, boomers who are enjoying a peaceful, calm and stable retirement may find themselves having to offer financial and emotional...

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Grandma, What Big Eyes You Have

(1) Comments | Posted September 13, 2013 | 11:06 AM

As part of my transition into my new phase of life (now called "inspirement"), I signed up for a class at San Francisco State University -- one of their offerings through their Osher Lifelong Learning Center (OLLI). If you are fortunate enough to live in a community with an OLLI,...

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The Case for Hiring Boomers -- An Open Letter to Employers

(2) Comments | Posted September 9, 2013 | 11:16 AM

Dear Employers:

I am feeling a little schizophrenic this morning after reading two online posts:

1) This report on how hard it is for workers age 55+ to find new employment if they are laid off.

2) A report by the Building Movement Project confirming...

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Tell Don't Yell

(1) Comments | Posted August 16, 2013 | 6:18 PM

In a recent email exchange with a San Francisco colleague, she told me she observed a mother, obviously at her wit's end, on a MUNI bus yelling at her young child, Just do what I say!. In all fairness, the mom was probably doing the best she could within her...

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I'm Still Your Grandma

(1) Comments | Posted August 2, 2013 | 5:30 PM

While I was Executive Director of Kids' Turn, San Francisco (www.kidsturn.org) and a grandmother myself, I became very aware of the important role grandparents play when their grandchildren experience parental separation. Obviously, this also means an adult child of the grandparents is going through separation or divorce --...

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The Royal Parents

(0) Comments | Posted July 23, 2013 | 12:01 PM

Ring the bells! Sound the trumpets! Hang the bunting! Plan the christening! The royal baby has arrived, and a beautiful baby he is. Like the face of every newborn, hope and innocence are reflected back to each person adoring the infant. And new parents Will and Kate will soon wonder...

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Running Out of Walls to Paint

(1) Comments | Posted July 16, 2013 | 5:43 PM

When my 30-something daughter was in the second grade, she was asked to complete this sentence by drawing a picture: 'My mom loves to...' My darling daughter said: 'My mom loves to WORK!', and the accompanying picture showed me (including the detail of my glasses) driving off to work as...

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With Friends Like This...

(2) Comments | Posted July 5, 2013 | 8:04 PM

Fifteen years ago, my husband and I relocated to Northern California to begin our committed life journey together. I took the job as the director of a small, independent school, and quickly became acquainted with several of the board members. I spent a great deal of time with one young...

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Asking For Help

(4) Comments | Posted May 4, 2013 | 4:21 AM

My husband and I were hanging new window blinds late on a Friday afternoon. Why we picked Friday after work to hang the blinds remains a mystery, but it is accurate to say that the project wasn't going very well when I suggested, "Should we ask a neighbor to come...

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Should Split Parents Ever Lie to Their Children?

(4) Comments | Posted April 2, 2013 | 12:19 PM

When I was four years old, our phone rang one evening and a woman on the phone asked for my father. I was a very late-in-life child -- my parents had married after a complicated ten-year courtship. The woman caller identified herself as my father's daughter -- a daughter he...

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It's Valentine's Day. Now What?

(5) Comments | Posted February 12, 2013 | 11:21 AM

It was bound to happen -- you are facing Valentine's Day as a newly separated adult and you don't quite know what to do with yourself. The good thing is that you no longer have to stand in front of the display of Valentine cards and try to find one...

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Holiday Survival

(1) Comments | Posted November 19, 2012 | 11:18 AM

Where did 2012 go? It's almost Thanksgiving, and holiday decorations, wrappings and sales are abound. With the holidays come great anxiety for separating families, especially those newly separated parents who are feeling worried, guilty and cash-strapped for their first holiday in two houses.

In my twelve years at

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