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deeannef
05:30 PM on 02/07/2012
Elope, problem solved.
05:24 PM on 02/07/2012
Why do weddings cost so much? Umm, because they're ab out Happily Ever After? Oh, divorce. OK, well because they represent Possibly Happily Ever After? Oh, statistics. OK, well maybe because it's the Happiest You'll Ever Be, So Make It Good!

;-)
05:20 PM on 02/07/2012
Have a small inexpensive wedding and spend most of it on the honeymoon. Keeping up with the Jone's is a fools game! With the average life expectancy of marriage these days do you still want to be paying on it while getting divorced?
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neighborhoodmole
no one really knows who anyone is here
06:59 PM on 02/07/2012
Better yet, spend it on a down payment for a house. Whether you stay together or eventually split up, that equity will grow and help your future financial security.
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Goddess Athena
Proud Liberal Floozy
05:14 PM on 02/07/2012
There are a lot of ways to save money on a wedding.

I got married in 1987. I was lucky enough to find a bridal store that was moving, and found a gown in my size for about $375 - a prior year's model and the store was getting rid of excess merchandise before the move. I found a headpiece on the sale rack ($60). I know this isn't going to happen for everyone, but there are plenty of ways to save money.

I was also lucky to work with a florist who took the time to tell me what would be available at that time of year (november) and worked with me to find flowers that would be beautiful and fit the budget.
I used champagne buckets with balloons tied to them as centerpieces. I got married in a hall with 25 foot ceilings, so having those ballons was more festive and fun than trying to come up with flowers that would look good in that setting. That saved a lot of money. I also bought all the liquor myself ahead of time when it was on sale. Not many venues will allow this, but the hall I rented was just the hall, and the caterer provided a bar tender and the soft drinks if I provided the liquor.

You just need to be a flexible and willing to do some of the legwork yourself if you want to save money and still have a beautiful & memorable wedding.
jokerdanny
my other bio is a macro
05:06 PM on 02/07/2012
the moral of the story is to settle for less, which shortly after taking your vows you'll realize you've already done ;-)
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UDKM2010
Life is better in Boardshorts.
04:56 PM on 02/07/2012
Put the guys in charge. Reception would be beer/chips and few dancers. More fun and you'll save a bundle too.
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TaxpayingVoter
Support Marriage Equality
04:53 PM on 02/07/2012
My first wedding we went to the JP. It cost $20. The second wedding was held in a little chapel and cost $40.

I've never been big on all the hoopla of weddings...lol

Even when I was a little girl I never dreamed of being a bride all dressed in white or anything.
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AusterityForWhom
Klaatu Barada Nikto
04:48 PM on 02/07/2012
It's a stereotype that brides are often demanding, childish and difficult to work with.

It's happens to be true, but still a stereotype.
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Miriam Breslauer
04:31 PM on 02/07/2012
I saved thousands of dollars on my wedding just by having it on a Sunday instead of a Saturday. The only wedding service that was more expensive on a Sunday was the Hair dresser. She cost a couple hundred more to do the wedding party's hair and makeup on a Sunday than Saturday. Food, location, wedding cake, DJ, photographer were all cheaper on a Sunday than Saturday. Flower costs were the same either day.
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neighborhoodmole
no one really knows who anyone is here
07:02 PM on 02/07/2012
I don't think Catholic churches allow weddings on Sunday. Or maybe just no funerals that day? As a recovering Catholic, I'm not sure now!
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mzrecycle
a very subtle micro-bio
04:27 PM on 02/07/2012
I got married in '74. I went to a local bridal store and bought my dress there. It was about $100, no fittings necessary. I selected a wide brimmed hat, as the style for veils looked like a volcano of tule erupting from the top of my head. Hat cost $50.
I went to choose a bouquet, but thought they were all awful. I chose one that was all greenery, no flowers. Mom wouldn't hear of it, went to the florist and picked one. It was fine with me, I really didn't care.
My parents belonged to a country club, so that's where the reception was. No sit down, that wasn't the fashion then. There was a nice buffet of mostly finger foods. The club provided the cake, I think. I can't even remember if I selected any details. I really felt that the reception part was really more important to my parents. I pretty much let mom make any plans she liked.

The photographer was late getting to our home (got lost) so there weren't many pictures before the wedding. Oh well...

The biggest expense was the food.

I just don't get the craziness of spending enough to make a down payment on a house. Unless the couple or the parents have that much money to give to that big extravaganza AND have a home down payment, why do it? I was just interested in getting married to the man that I loved.
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Haveissues
You well heeled big wheel, ha ha, charade you are
04:26 PM on 02/07/2012
Get married at the JP. Much cheaper. Then you can buy a car or a house with the money.
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CatGotcha
What's the matter?
06:02 PM on 02/07/2012
That's what we did. Used that money for a mega vacation. Best decision evah!
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Haveissues
You well heeled big wheel, ha ha, charade you are
09:24 PM on 02/07/2012
One of my friends spent $30,000 on a wedding and reception. 18 months later she ran off to England with another guy.
04:26 PM on 02/07/2012
Why are they so expensive? Because having a "wedding" is more important than "getting married."
05:16 PM on 02/07/2012
And "feeling like a princess for a day" is somehow worth incurring massive debt. Yay materialism!

Did I mention that $ problems are a factor in most divorces? Yay materialism!
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RuthieBabe
My kids are alien scientists from Alpha Centauri.
05:30 PM on 02/07/2012
This all goes back generations to the lavish displays that the wealthy put on for their sons and daughters to impress other important people. The under classes began trying to copy the upper classes to make it appear they had money, too, even if they didn't. Some of Jane Austen's novels speak about this--making appearances of wealth.
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CatGotcha
What's the matter?
06:03 PM on 02/07/2012
LOL! Yay foolishness!
foresure
Brash and Harsh
06:15 PM on 02/07/2012
Perry:

Very good. For a further explanation see the movie "Raw" with Eddie Murphy.

It explains everything.

Avaliable from Amazon.
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Rokgoo
looking for the right side of the left
04:23 PM on 02/07/2012
In a time when more than 50% of married couples end up in divorce court, investing in a big wedding ceremony just because "You marry just ones" is insane.
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David Esper
04:21 PM on 02/07/2012
It costs about $80K to throw a nice wedding (not lavish) for 200 people in the Tri State area, that includes the dress, limo's, flowers, etc.. That's a lot of money for an 8 hour event.
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philhellene
Far Left and Proud of It!
04:20 PM on 02/07/2012
There are two words in the English language that quadruple the price of anything: medicinal and matrimonial. Both play on our emotions - the first on our fear, the second on our hope, societal pressure and need to impress.
This user has chosen to opt out of the Badges program
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07:27 PM on 02/07/2012
add memorial services to the list, and remember that industry is only thinking about what they can strip from the grieving family.....
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ladywindsor1
09:50 PM on 02/11/2012
When my father died, my brothers and I had never had to plan a funeral. Although divorced, my parents were on very good terms but Mom was out of town. We didn't know the first thing. The owner of the funeral home took us to a casket show room. Seeing we were clueless, he said, you want to honor your father. Just understand no matter how much you spend, the end result is the same. We chose a mid range casket. He helped us choose a casket spray my father would have loved for about $100. He was so kind. The cemetary on the other hand, was a whole nother story. There must be a special place in hell.
BTW, I thought the funeral home guy was trying to say my father would still be deceased. Apparently a lot of people are under the impression the more expensive the casket the less likely the body will decompose. Not true. We decompose. It's what we do.