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Tabasco
Never eat anything bigger than your head. - Kliban
10:45 AM on 02/23/2013
Aaron Williams should be the next Pope.

He'd open up the vatican library and archives, offer coffee, sandwiches, pastries, music shows and WiFi to all the visitors.

He'd donate most of the Vatican holdings and wealth to fight hunger, disease and homelessness.
09:13 PM on 02/23/2013
Not only that, you should taste his Sauce Bolognese. Divine!
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LeftyHeinz
God is love
08:18 AM on 02/23/2013
Jesus called Satan a thief and a thief prefers not to be recognized. The main deception that Satan has pulled off is that he does not exist, but he is a worthy adversary and we must understand his tactics and schemes. He wants to be the hero of the day, instead of God, and it appears that some would rather serve and honor Satan than God. God believes it's important for the righteous to judge the wicked, and Satanists, pastafarians, evilutionists, rock stars, anarchists, new atheists and other socially rebellious people will experience the worst judgment of all. God does not want anyone to perish, but unless one repents and accepts the one true God, all is lost.
09:31 AM on 02/23/2013
So, to summarize, "God will torture, eternally, deliberately, and with the maximum pain and anguish possible ... those who do not accept his unconditional love."

Got it. Thanks.
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UnderTheHedgeWeGo
Show me some evidence.
10:19 AM on 02/23/2013
And Lefty never leaves out the most important thing "God believes it's important for the righteous to judge the wicked". Lefty himself is imbued by GOD with the right to judge you, me, "rock stars", "socially rebellious people" any anyone else who doesn't meet his requirements. Can you imagine a world in which this nutball had some actual authority?
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02:43 PM on 02/23/2013
OH MY FLYING SPAGHETTI MONSTER... that is the best and most accurate description of religion I have ever heard.

Thank you from the bottom of my noodley appendages!
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1waitasec
theology = opinion based on conjecture, so what?
09:42 AM on 02/23/2013
lefty, you never got back to me...
does your god have room for skepticism in his love or does god want people to be dishonest with themselves and pretend to believe?
the way i see it is, if god is all knowing and god knew how my mind worked, that i require evidence in order to believe something were true, i don't understand why an all knowing god would hold that criterion against a person, unless this god is an insecure jerk.
ParadoxHarbinger
shoulder high in crap, water wings are flat
12:25 PM on 02/23/2013
don't hold your breath waiting for a reply for him.
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HopeforJohn
These little lights of mine...
04:22 PM on 02/23/2013
There is a God. He loves you unconditionally. Jesus has a great example of this in the Bible. Who would know God better than His own Son?
A rich man holds a banquet for all his rich friends and spares no expenses. But no one shows up. Instead of getting disappointed and upset, he has his servant go out and get all the "undeserving". Needless to say, they have a great time because they would have never imagined anyone giving them an opportunity like this!
God doesn't get upset if you don't show up. He loves ALL His children. He built us in His image and loves to see our hearts get close to His. He has given us all a chance to attend His banquet...I for one do NOT want to miss out! What about you?
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StillMadMatt
Offending the right people is its own virtue.
07:25 AM on 02/23/2013
Ramen!!
10:45 AM on 02/23/2013
In the wolling waters of life, we seek Al'Dente
Unto each life some sauce must fall
and remember our our gay rastafarians (the meatball sect)
and our lesbian sisters (the marinara sect)
for all shall combine in the great gastronomy of heaven
we'll not discuss the nether worlds its a crappy subject
12:04 PM on 02/23/2013
All hail the holy trinity of pasta, sauce and cheese.
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wisdom4you
wisdom is/ = alter ego perspectives :-)
03:53 AM on 02/23/2013
I just broke my record of hitting the favs key :-)
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LeftyHeinz
God is love
07:03 AM on 02/23/2013
Faith counteracts the destructive effects of sinful actions and activities.
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1waitasec
theology = opinion based on conjecture, so what?
09:44 AM on 02/23/2013
can you tell me the difference between faith and wishful thinking...cause if you can then i would take your meaningless tripe more seriously.
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UnderTheHedgeWeGo
Show me some evidence.
10:20 AM on 02/23/2013
"Faith" insulates the Believer from reality and nothing more.
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Shawn1978
type Conspiracy behind the subject for the truth
03:12 AM on 02/23/2013
I wonder If like Charles Darwin these wannabe's believe in incest and eugenics? I'm not refuting his right to worship or demean any other religion just saying this country has seemed to become one bad joke. just saying.
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Twootchy
Too sane to be 100% Conservative or 100% Liberal
03:56 AM on 02/23/2013
Religion has been a bad joke for centuries.
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FELICITYSFARM
12:30 PM on 02/23/2013
You are so right. Read/view "Caesars Messiah" Christianity is a dark roman joke/hoax to quell the raging jews.
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Shawn1978
type Conspiracy behind the subject for the truth
10:39 PM on 02/24/2013
HMMMMM Maybe we did Evolve from Apes. It seems that some of us still haven't made a full transition.
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Darren J Cohen
I'm semi-awesome!
11:04 AM on 02/23/2013
Oh, wow, you just shot down evolution theory by claiming that Darwin supported incest and eugenics! I heard he slurped his coffee, too! Wow, why didn't anyone else think of fighting the facts of evolution by simply attacking the man known for creating the theory! It seems like this sort of an attack should have some sort of Latin name, though, to make it sound more scientific...
12:37 PM on 02/23/2013
Yeah. Ad hominy? Ad Homunculous?
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Doug Sandlin
05:32 PM on 02/23/2013
Wait .... Darwin .... slurped his coffee .......??

Faved.

Certain commenters seem to be entirely unaware that they are part of the amusement .... which, to be fair, makes them even more amusing.
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wisdom4you
wisdom is/ = alter ego perspectives :-)
02:53 AM on 02/23/2013
time to sue the NJDMV in fed court ... I did, and I won.
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Stephie Mark
Occupy everywhere
01:50 AM on 02/23/2013
All hail his holy appendage!
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redsoxx11
..sing this corrosion to me
05:39 AM on 02/23/2013
Ramen!
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Doug Sandlin
05:33 PM on 02/23/2013
May His Sauce be served warm!
01:08 AM on 02/23/2013
Aaron needs to contact the Canadian Office for Religious Freedoms, newly formed by the Canadian Evangelical Christian Crime Minister, SStephen Harper, to promote religious freedoms internationally and as a replacement for Canada's Human Rights Commission which Harper does not consider to be important.

http://www.international.gc.ca/religious_freedom-liberte_de_religion/index.aspx

http://www.theglobeandmail.com/commentary/religious-freedom-this-office-is-about-ethnic-votes/article8901119/
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Loki Laufeyson
If everybody had empathy, there would be no crime.
03:27 PM on 02/23/2013
Always been one of Stevie's not-so-hidden priorities.
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01:04 AM on 02/23/2013
ewige blumenkraft!
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Doug Sandlin
05:33 PM on 02/23/2013
Gesundheit!
12:22 AM on 02/23/2013
FSM IS REAL
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Gumbo Limbo
Are three enough? Are six too many?
11:20 AM on 02/23/2013
Ah! You, too, have been Touched By His Noodly Appendage!
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Fran Jaime
09:48 PM on 02/23/2013
The world is going Pastafarian!
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11:07 PM on 02/22/2013
This is just another example of the most persecuted religion in the world. *strikes martyr pose*

Suck it up, Christians.
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LeftyHeinz
God is love
10:50 PM on 02/22/2013
Instead of informing pastafarians that, "God loves you", it would be more accurate to say that, "God wants to love you." The real issue is not the fact that God loves humanity for this is commonly accepted except among the unbelievers, but regardless of how much evidence unbelievers are confronted with, most will refuse to believe the Word of our Lord because believing requires them to forsake their sins. The last thing the sinner wants to do is give up his sins because he loves sin and hates righteousness. Believing is total commitment and the righteous have forsaken ALL sin and selfishness in order to qualify. Unbelief is a mortal sin because everyone intuitively knows God. Nature reveals His existence so, having observed the obvious existence of the creator, the wicked are without excuse. God does not want anyone to perish, but unless one repents and accepts the one true God, all is lost.
11:24 PM on 02/22/2013
And just what evidence are you confronting us with?
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Woden
Skeptical atheist Democrat
05:55 AM on 02/23/2013
Evidence ex posteriori, of course.

And no, I was not referring to the logic term "a posteriori". ;)
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1waitasec
theology = opinion based on conjecture, so what?
11:27 PM on 02/22/2013
question about love...
is there enough room for skepticism pertaining to your gods love, or is your gods love contingent on pretense?
12:13 AM on 02/23/2013
Skepticism? There's room for blasphemy:
"Anyone who speaks a word against the Son of Man will be forgiven" Matthew 12:32
But yes, skepticism too. The disciple Thomas was supposed to be a skeptic, but was still allowed in the closest inner circle of Jesus' followers. As for whether the *followers* of this God make the same allowances is sadly another matter completely, as you've seen.

Lefty, you are doing more harm than good to your cause here. Wipe the dust from your feet and move on.
02:31 PM on 02/24/2013
This whole thing is not about religious freedom and I am surprised at those who have swallowed that propaganda. It is about one person trying to show off and act like a nut in a place that is business, not pleasure, for the people who work their and the dozens who have to take off work, wait in lines for four hours often out the door (our local drivers license bureau is about the size of a small fast food place) and go through all of the rigamarole to get a license. These are photographs for a drivers license, a legal form of identity! This is not some sort of social media or some place to come to pull a stunt or try to show off !!
Everyone should know the rules : no hats, caps, hoods, shirts with messages, sunglasses, smiling, hand or finger gestures, head phones.visible necklaces, face jewelry, paraphernalia, or heavy makeup. Around here, that will get you kicked out in a heart beat!!
10:15 PM on 02/22/2013
I like Russel's teapot and I like the FSM. That said, I think they have both been a bit overused.

I am admittedly antagonistic to dogmatic religion -- in part because I believe mockery of my beliefs was instrumental in me finding the strength to stand up to my indoctrination and de-convert. I've always been offended by "kid gloves" treatment... and I hate being patronized.

An untestable hypothesis and unprovable assertions are the basis for dogmatic religion -- And that is a powerful truth to communicate to people.

My "concern" is that the FSM has become a bit of a meaningless phrase, as many words and phrases happen to do. It is seen by theists as an easy way to dismiss arguments because they see people as merely "parroting" the strident atheist talking points.

The reality is there is basically no rational reason to accept the claims of religion -- that is an important point to make clearly if you believe the exisitence of religion causes a net harm in the physical universe.

(Of course, I do still worship the FSM... I'm just saying we need to be careful not to take His noodly name in vain...)
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Craig 212
Tide goes in, tide goes out.
12:41 AM on 02/23/2013
I think FSM is overused, I think Russell's Teapot is not used enough.
12:51 AM on 02/23/2013
Both are great mind exercises. The concept is difficult to dismiss if introduced properly. The teapot has less of a reputation preceding it in 2013 = more effective.
12:55 AM on 02/23/2013
"I am admittedly antagonistic to dogmatic religion"

Just dogmatic religion, or all religion?

I also like the analogy of Russel's teapot, but coming at it from the other angle. Supposing a space traveller somehow witnessed the teapot first hand but was unable to document proof before it passed out of view, how should they react? They could certaiunly question or try to reason away the experience, and I don't think we'd blame them. But without a really compelling reason to reject the experience, I don't think we can blame them for accepting the experience at face value, either. In both cases, I would expect there to be some doubt and second-guessing. Where we could become critical of the teapot's beholder isn't his experience and what he makes of it, but whether he starts making outlandish claims and expecting us to believe him without evidence.

That's how I feel about religion. If a person feels personally touched by something beyond normal comprehension, it's up to that person what to make of it. But it's not for them to judge the rest of us for not agreeing with them just on their say so, or on the say so of a book that makes equally unverifiable (or unfalsifiable) claims. Likewise, if someone without that direct experience accepts strange ideas simply on another person's word, we're justified in questioning their reasoning skills.
01:14 AM on 02/23/2013
I think I agree with you. I think religion can be useful as a signpost to direct people toward spiritual experience. But what tends to happen is that people end up worshipping the signposts. And we are all wired to defend our signposts -- they become important to our ego and identity. We make our Signposts sacred and insist other people's signposts are misguided -- and that is "true"... the signposts that showed us the "truth" will always be more sacred to us. We will wince defensively when someone says "You are wrong" and we will feel empowered when someone says "You are right". In this way, I believe in "seeing" the teapot, and how that experience is "true" and "false" at the same time. This is dogmatic religion, and it is Biblical: "having a form of godliness but denying its power. Have nothing to do with them." (I Tim 3:5). But this sort of dichotomy is difficult to act on, especially in the West -- where pragmatism rules... So people reject it. And take 1 Tim 3:5 to mean "those people". (Hell, I'm kind of doing it right now...:) 
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wisdom4you
wisdom is/ = alter ego perspectives :-)
02:59 AM on 02/23/2013
flamepanther ... sorry, but you cannot assume they have any reasoning skills.
10:09 PM on 02/22/2013
"...for it is written... those whoeth rejecteth the Holy Cheese or the Holy sauce shall be cast down the Unholy Drain unto the pipes of the underworld. Those whoeth blasphemeth the Holy Sauce or the Holy Cheese blasphemeth His Noodleness." - The Secret Profit of Noodleness
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Mr Teflon
Ain't I a stinker?
12:03 AM on 02/23/2013
R'Amen!
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wisdom4you
wisdom is/ = alter ego perspectives :-)
03:10 AM on 02/23/2013
MrT :-) there you are :-) ... I am now getting too many responses to find yours to respond to. For the most part, was just going to goof on your attornyness when responding to certain other posts ... in any event, I see by your responses here, they indeed might be hope for you after all :-) You might note that the church of the FSM comes from Jersey, and so did I :-)
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Heidland
I like all things pie-ish. Oh, and cake.
10:06 PM on 02/22/2013
HERETIC!

May his Magestic Noodliness smite you with the nefarious White Sauce of Doooooom for your blasphenmy. True Pastafarians know that only Official Pirate Garb is sanctioned by the church.

May his warm deliciousness forgive your slight and pass his great noodly appendage of forgiveness to welcome you back to the Marinara of Life.

R'amen.
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11:35 PM on 02/22/2013
Yes, but it just goes to reason that Pirates would wear colanders if they had colander to wear. And by reason I mean that of other mythologies and not the True Word of TFSM.