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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
JuliaOceania
Get Insured - healthcare.gov
06:53 PM on 04/26/2013
I think this blog does generalize some, although I have heard lots of women with this complaint, men do not step up to care for them when they need it, yet expect lots of care for minor things. Personally, I think the problem is with both sides. Women should outline what they expect. If I needed my mate to care for me and he did not step up and do so, he would probably cease to be my mate. Life is too short to feel crummy with no help or empathy.

And no, I do not expect myself to be able to grin and bear it when I am sick. I take care of me. I do not pretend to be tough by allowing my health to deteriorate without complaint. Women can be their own worst enemies. They allow people to minimize their hurts and pains and take care of others before they take care of themselves... then they get mad when their partner takes them and their ability to recuperate for granted.

And not to be hard on the writer of this blog, but it sends a bad message to women that they are super tough to take health ailments in stride, as if this is a point of pride. It shouldn't be.
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
cafebeege
01:28 PM on 04/27/2013
No, it shouldn't be "a point of pride", but in multiple ways we are conditioned. Many start with having to get used to cramps and the accompanying discomforts on a monthly basis. That's part of our lives from a young age on and just normal life. I have said, "If men had periods, it would be considered an illness and they'd insist on 3 sick days a month off of work, be sitting on the couch watching football, moaning, asking someone to get them a beer." Then we go on to give birth and continue the human race. Part of life...... And from the time we give birth on, that baby's needs take priority. Nature/hormones "condition" that instinct. So we women "move" into the role of caretaker of others. I agree with you we must guard the balance of taking care of ourselves as well.

And yes, before anyone says it, men go off to war when necessary and all that entails.

Life is about balance ..... give and take, as I think you are trying to say. Then again, our society has lost so much of the former civility, thoughtfulness and even manners.
06:35 PM on 04/26/2013
I've known lots of men in my life who are strong and can take pain and keep moving( my father was one example), and contrary to this author's views, if men had to bear children, there would probably be just as many on the planet as there are right now! Please don't stereotype all of us into a nice little package to fit your sexist ideology. Men and can be just as strong(physically and emotionally) as women!
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HUFFPOST BLOGGER
Tammy Bleck
08:14 PM on 04/26/2013
Flickfire22, I agree. Men are wonderfully strong, both physically and emotionally. My grandfather was the epitome of staunch courage and strength. But many, as stated in my humorous post, have a dire aversion to hospitals and doctors (not that I can blame them). I have no sexist ideology, nor do I stereotype men or women. I'm just a humor writer that sees the funny side of the human condition. Darn good thing for me that I don't need everyone's approval or understanding. Still, I'm very appreciative of the read AND the comment, and I'm glad you're here.
10:42 PM on 04/26/2013
So when are you going to write something humorous?
06:35 PM on 04/26/2013
I think men kill the bugs just so they can maintain the illusion of being the stronger sex! Glad to hear Steven is on the mend and getting lots of TLC. Love your sense of humor & hope to read more from you here - thanks for the laughs!
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HUFFPOST BLOGGER
Tammy Bleck
07:42 PM on 04/26/2013
MArmentrout, thanks ever so for your comment. Great to know that humor is alive and well out there. Happy you stopped in for the read and the laughs (although debatable). Love having you here!
06:23 PM on 04/26/2013
Hah! Very funny read, and obviously it was intended as such. Even more amused at how grumpy people get about a humorous essay. My husband has a much lower pain threshold than I do and he's the first to admit it. And when I'm sick, he too keeps a safe distance down the hall. I'd also like to point out that I'm the resident mouse and spider attacker - and that's even included tarantulas.
http://www.kristenbrakeman.com
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HUFFPOST BLOGGER
Tammy Bleck
07:55 PM on 04/26/2013
Kris b, many women agree and many men don't. Go figure. We know our men are strong, viral and capable. We also know that many (not all) men react rather badly when down with a cold or facing a surgery. This WAS a humorous account of what was happening in my house between me and the wonderful man I share my life with. Like your husband, my fiancé admits to being a bit of a baby in these circumstances. There is strength in that. Kudos to you for being the resident spider killer. Eeeew! Appreciate the read AND the comment!
05:49 PM on 04/26/2013
I don't think well wishes are going to help. I haul people to the OR for a living (often with a sore left ankle and with patients up to and above 500 lbs, BTW). Never noticed a connection between gender and whinieness. My sympathies, Steven. Oh, and good luck with your procedure as well.
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05:06 PM on 04/26/2013
I can not believe this. this is absolutely, absolutely, absolutely horrible. i know, i know, "it's all in jest", but no. as plenty of commenters have said, if a man wrote a joking article about how men are the better sex, he'd be thrown off the internet.

people like you are holding feminism back. you are the reason i have to argue with people so often that real feminists don't hate men, they just want men and women to be equal, because people like you DO hate men. STOP MAKING GENERALIZATIONS. not all women are awsome endure-it-all badasses, not all men are whiney crybabies, and vice-versa. if you ever want people to take women seriously, you, and everyone else, have to acknowledge that we are all different, and our sex does not define any of us. we are ALL privileged, in different ways, men AND women. just like we are all disadvantaged, in different ways, men and women.

like i said, i realize that this author was not trying to write a feminist piece, just a joke about her husband. but the fact is jokes contribute to culture, which shapes our lives through opinions, biases, prejudices, preconceived notions, supporters and detractors of groups and movements, all which translate into privileges and disadvantages. and that matters, and that should be taken into consideration.
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HUFFPOST BLOGGER
Sharon Greenthal
Blogger, Empty House Full Mind
11:23 PM on 04/26/2013
If every stereotype and every generalization were eliminated from the repertoires of comedians, sitcom writers and screenwriters, there would be a whole lot less comedies. Laughing at ourselves is one of the most intelligent things people can do. For goodness sake this was a brief blog post, not an educational textbook.
10:50 AM on 04/28/2013
Yes laughing at ourselves is one thing but how can we take women's complaints about sexist stereotypes seriously with posts from a blogger like this? It's not exactly a gray area. You're repeating just what sexist men have been saying, "Come on sweetie, don't take it so seriously, it's JUST a joke"
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08:58 PM on 04/28/2013
@ "snphillips"

...You will note that the word "privilege" chimes the gravitas of your post, as well as other posts here.

Both men and women suffer within the class of less privilege, and neither gender is "more stoic' about pain than the other.

The joke rings hollow to those who've known long-term tragedy and suffering. Read between the lines. Look steady upon this writer's generation. What do you see ?

Shallow.

Read between the lines.

Some jokes are funny. Some are shallow.

Pain and tragedy is gender blind.
04:32 PM on 04/26/2013
As a man, I take umbrage at the idea that men are babies when it comes to pain. I think the problem lies in women accepting that their man has a "weakness" exhibited by admitting to feeling pain/illness and expecting the female to exhibit the "strength" of a caregiver. Male athletes routinely are expected to play through painful injuries. Preteen boys learn to accept pain without tears - girls are allowed to cry. Men are "brave and fearless" in many ways but when we are sick all bets are off! Stop whining and bring on the pampering! WE DESERVE IT!!!
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HUFFPOST BLOGGER
Tammy Bleck
06:41 PM on 04/26/2013
Teeman1969, yes, you DO deserve it! No worries, the patient is healing fine, driving and dining out. The post chronicled the reactions PRIOR to any surgery. The anticipation is the hardest part. This wonderfully strong man admits to being a bit of a baby when it comes to hospitals. Who isn't. When the surgery was performed, he was smothered with TLC, ice cream and his favorite TV shows. All in jest, my friend, all in jest. Thanks for the read AND the comment!
04:29 PM on 04/26/2013
What's wrong with being sexy?
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
Alex McKay
04:11 PM on 04/26/2013
So her significant other needs to TOUGHEN up. I want the proof that men are totally weak, and we all know most guys have act soft for their ladies, other wise we'd break them.

ha ha just kidding the article is crap though.
03:35 PM on 04/26/2013
This has been true since Heloise wrote her books, or even longer.
03:33 PM on 04/26/2013
And posts like this are the reasons I think:
A. Women are far more sexist than men.
B. Women are privileged. Men would never get away with gleefully typing up a "men are better" article (btw there are 6 male geniuses for every 1 female...just saying)

These female typed, pat yourself/your gender on the back articles are constantly being typed up by women and male servants in this pro-grrrl culture we live in...yet it is women who have it soo bad.
04:27 PM on 04/26/2013
Yes, reading these articles (when you don't have to read, you clicked on it) is sooo bad compared to the sexism women deal with almost on a daily basis. Catcalls on the street, gropings, rapes, gender bias in promotions and salaries, I could go on. Each gender has their pros and cons, this just happens to be an area where most minorities (if not in numbers then in power) have the option. Minorities can write things like this without much retribution, it's the price you pay for not being the "minority" sex, sorry!
08:31 PM on 04/26/2013
Fed Level female only programs:

Office on Women’s Health (OWH)
National Women’s Health Week
Office of Women's Health - Heart Truth
National Women and Girls HIV/AIDS Awareness Day
Center for Research on Women with Disabilities

The 2011 Affordable Health Care Act Covered Preventive Services for Women

Anemia screening on a routine basis for pregnant women
Bacteriuria urinary tract or other infection screening for pregnant women
BRCA counseling about genetic testing for women at higher risk
Cervical Cancer screening for sexually active women
Chlamydia Infection screening for younger women and other women at higher risk
Folic Acid supplements for women who may become pregnant
Gonorrhea screening for all women at higher risk
Hepatitis B screening for pregnant women at their first prenatal visit
Osteoporosis screening for women over age 60 depending on risk factors
Rh Incompatibility screening for all pregnant women and testing for women at higher risk
Tobacco Use screening and interventions for all women
Syphilis screening for all pregnant women or other women at increased risk
Women's Preventive Services
Well-woman visits

Center for Women Veterans
Women Veterans Health Care
Specialized Programs for Homeless Women Veterans
Women's Health Sciences Division (WHSD)
Veterans Affairs Research and Development for Women's Health

White house council for women and girls
Women's Educational Equity Act
Title IX Girls in Math and Science Grant Program

"Catherine Keau castration" YouTube search that and watch 4 women on a NATIONAL show openly make fun of a guy who was mutilated by his wife for wanting a divorce.
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Chloe Jeffreys
Writer at Chloe of the Mountain
06:50 PM on 04/26/2013
Men don't need to write up a little Huffington Post article saying they think men are better than women. Nearly everything they've written from the dawn of time, from the Bible, to the Quran, right on through to every piece of porn they make today, says they feel they are superior to women and the dominant gender. All the gods they create and the rules that go with those gods are all to men's favor because men do believe they are superior to women.
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crezyoz
Posting with finger picks on
03:03 PM on 04/26/2013
" Women take pain, panic, worry, anger, hurt and fear without missing a beat and all the while, wearing a smile."

Wow.. welcome to a parallel universe.
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HUFFPOST BLOGGER
Linda Wolff
Blogger, Carpool Goddess
03:03 PM on 04/26/2013
I love, love, love men, and would never want to live without them, quirks and all (we're not so perfect either, right?), but there is a reason we bear the children and have our monthly friend come visit us. Who else could handle that? And yes, they do revert to little boys when they're sick, bless their hearts. It gives me a chance to be mother hen again :)
03:20 PM on 04/26/2013
I love, love, love women, and would never want to live without them, quirks and all (we're not so perfect either, right?), but there is a reason only men qualify for US Navy Seals and Special Forces. Who else could handle that? ;)
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HUFFPOST BLOGGER
Linda Wolff
Blogger, Carpool Goddess
04:14 PM on 04/26/2013
Yes, I totally agree with you! That's what makes the world go round :)
07:13 PM on 04/26/2013
Don't forget Rangers!
RealistBC
Micro-bios must pass muster. Mine won't.
03:32 PM on 04/26/2013
OK, Linda. I'll be nicer than some of your sisters will be.
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HUFFPOST BLOGGER
Linda Wolff
Blogger, Carpool Goddess
04:25 PM on 04/26/2013
My reply was supposed to be funny and with no intent to offend. Sorry if you feel it missed the mark. Have a lovely weekend.
03:01 PM on 04/26/2013
"How many times has it been said that if men endured the pregnancies, the planet would cease to be populated?"

Ever see one of those short films where a man is rigged up to experience the pain of childbirth? Do you know why those men elect to do that? To see if they can. Not for the sake of bringing a living human being out of their bodies, but just to see if they can. So if men HAD to endure pregnancies I don't think the species would fail. Men would just turn it into a contest - and maybe be more abusive towards their wives because - hormones.
HUFFPOST SUPER USER
bigstew2004205
02:46 PM on 04/26/2013
Oh Boy, I wonder what would happen if a man wrote this about women?
RealistBC
Micro-bios must pass muster. Mine won't.
03:06 PM on 04/26/2013
Have you a flame suit? We'd watch the comment server explode from the angry responses.