Obama's Secret Cash for Grandma Plan

09/25/2009 05:12 am ET | Updated May 25, 2011
  • Meathead, Barbecue Whisperer, Hedonism Evangelist, Omnivore

I haven't protested since they wanted to draft me in the '60s, but I've had all I can take and I'm gonna be at the next clown hall meeting with my Senator carrying a banner and my concealed handgun.

My buddy Benny, a salesman who listens to his talk radio in his car and is up to date on what's REALLY going on, sent me a TrueTube video of a famous internet jogger who says that, since the Cash for Clunkers program was so successful, and since Obama could not figure out how to pay for his French fried socialized medicine, that he has come up with a scheme to pay us $4,500 for Momma when she turns 65 so she can be turned over to a veterinarian to euphemize her, saving gazillions in medical bills and Social Security. It's a good thing I've got Benny to keep me informed because you just can't find this stuff in the liberal mainstream media.

So I'm gonna get in my Senator's face. It's bad enough that a Kenyan orphan with the middle name Hussein, raised in Hawaii (Benny says it wasn't even a state then and nobody's ever seen Obama's parent's marriage license so you know what that makes him), who went to a liberal east coast college to become a lawyer and then to Chicago to be a machine politco who wants to turn this into a socialist Nazi country by taking over the banks and car companies and turn them over to the unions and the brie and Chablis crowd like the Trilateral Bilderbergs which are really run by Hillary and Bill, has run the economy into the ditch.

Nothing that my senator and his commie cronies can tell me will make me believe that the government bureaucrats can run health care better than the insurance company bureaucrats.

Just look at how the Feds have screwed up the the Army, Medicare, Social Security, the National Parks, the FAA, and the Justice Department. We ought to close them all down.

I'm serious. Show me where the Constitution says that it's big government's job to keep the population healthy and to stop suffering. Just read the Preamble "We the People of the United States, in Order to form a more perfect Union, establish Justice, insure domestic Tranquility, provide for the common defence [cq], promote the general Welfare, and secure the Blessings of Liberty to ourselves and our Posterity, do ordain and establish this Constitution for the United States of America." Hah! Nothing about health care in there. And if it's not in the Constitution then keep your hands off.

So I'm going to my son's high school football game and practice shouting to get my voice in shape and then I'm gonna give my senator a piece of my mind.

No way I'm gonna let them have Momma when she hits 65. No way I'm gonna look for a new place to live.

Unless otherwise noted, all text is Copyright (c) 2009 By Craig "Meathead" Goldwyn, and all rights are reserved. For more of Meathead's writing and recipes, please visit Click here for information on reprint rights.