The Biggest Loser: Sovereign Debt Edition

05/26/2010 06:42 pm ET | Updated May 25, 2011

Last night, Micheal Ventrella was declared the winner of the 2010 season of The Biggest Loser. In celebration of such a respectable accomplishment, I propose we solve the global sovereign debt crisis in the same manner: good 'ole fashion reality TV competition.

The season premier starts with each countries' head of state taking to the scales (yes, that means every country, not just Greece, Portugal, Spain, Italy, Ireland, the UK, and the US). Once the starting debt load is measured in each home country and the politician makes the requisite tear jerking regrets and promises to his/her citizens, the heads of state travel to a "ranch" where they are isolated to work off their sovereign debt.

Like The Biggest Loser trainers Bob and Jillian, our Sovereign Debt edition will include fiscal austerity trainers. In addition, the ranch will also have onsite: an elementary school mathematician who teaches that 2 minus 3 equals a negative number, an addiction counselor from the show Intervention, and a shock therapy doctor who specializes in reconditioning the brain to stop lying.

Rather than have a season of shows during which countries are voted off the ranch for not losing enough debt, it's one long season with one final weigh in. This will prevent the laziest politicians from throwing in the towel to head back to their homegrown spending spree.

At the end of the season, each head of state will once again weigh in for the entire world to see. No more excuses. No more scapegoating. The prize? Super cheap interest rates, global investor confidence, and possibly the chance to become a reserve currency.

Heads of States: are you in? Do you truly desire to run a sustainable ship for the benefit of future generations of your peoples? If so, hop on the scales and let the games begin! If you are a home gamer interested in how the sovereign debt crisis will affect markets, check out my special report.