Here's what Despicable Me 2 does not do:
1. It does not inflict small bruises about your face and hands.
2. It does not siphon off valuable water supplies to feed the alien hoard.
3. It does not require you to pay for costly therapy sessions for your traumatized children.
After that, you're on your own. Cinefantastique Online's Steve Biodrowski and Dan Persons sat through this sequel in which reformed villain Gru (voiced by Steve Carell) faces off against a new villain while negotiating a complicated personal life, and their discussion focuses on how a film with so many pluses -- minions galore; a talented voice cast that includes Kristen Wiig, Benjamin Bratt, Steve Coogan and Russell Brand (but missing one highly-publicized player) -- could wind up so flat.
Then, Steve gives his take on the new horror anthology, V/H/S/2, which opens theatrically next week. Plus, what else is coming to theaters (hint: Pacific Rim).