In what was billed as a major campaign announcement, GOP gubernatorial basket case Carl Paladino hailed the sexual power of his Democratic rival, state Attorney General Andrew Cuomo.
There was more, but what the world will remember is: "Andrew's prowess is legendary." Not the next step in a campaign anybody, including the Republicans, should have been planning.
Paladino, 64, is still complaining about the fact that the New York Post dispatched a reporter and photographer to the home of his 10-year-old love child and former mistress.
"For weeks the media has badgered me about affairs because unlike a career politician, I was honest enough to acknowledge she was my daughter," the Buffalo builder said during a three-minute infomercial aired on Buffalo TV stations.
"Does the media ask Andrew such questions? Andrew's prowess is legendary," he added.
The idea of investigating Andrew Cuomo's sex life fills me with the deepest despair. The only thing more suicidal might be an investigation of Paladino's sex life. The entire state of New York has been dragged into some sort of angry-guy fantasy of a political campaign.
Paladino caught the attention of every state reporter on Thursday when his campaign revealed he had purchased TV time for a special announcement. It turned out to be TV time on three stations in Buffalo, and the announcement was more of the same: Albany is broken; everybody's a crook; Carl has a plan -- and oh, by the way, Andrew Cuomo has had way more paramours and why is nobody asking him about it?
"A pit bull is more housebroken than Carl Paladino," said NYU's Mitchell Moss.
A pit bull in heat, it seems. Despite what he says about the importance of issues, Paladino just can't stop talking about sex. He's the guy in your college dorm who could never get a date. Women know he's a loser.
If you doubt this, take a look at the latest Quinnipiac poll. The survey gives Cuomo a comfortable 18-point lead in the race. But the attorney general's edge among men is razor thin (47-46 percent). However, Cuomo's lead over Paladino among women is a jaw-dropping 35 points (63-28 percent).
Paladino's angry-white-man-on-the-warpath schtick carried him to the GOP nomination and still resonates with many men and upstate voters. But his abysmal performance with women dooms him to defeat.
The Tea Party-favorite also managed to make himself look ridiculous with a testosterone-drenched complaint that Cuomo was afraid to debate. "Come out and debate like a man," he challenged.
As it turned out, Paladino was the only gubernatorial candidate who hadn't agreed to participate in an Oct. 18 debate. His campaign quickly backtracked and announced that Paladino would take part.
Can't wait. Sigh.
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