Coming Home

Until recently, the closest I ever got to a soldier in uniform was when the National Guard stood guard during a demonstration on my college campus during the Vietnam era. I don't remember the words on the sign I held, but I remember they seemed to bother the soldier across the rope, who glared at me. The divide between us was only a few feet -- but it represented an ideological chasm I knew I would never cross. Until I did.

Exactly one year ago, I stood behind another rope, holding another sign, looking into the eyes of another soldier. This time my eyes were filled with tears and so were his. The sign had his name on it, followed by the words "Welcome Home." The soldier was my son-in-law, home safe after 15 months in Iraq.

Since Vietnam, things are both different and the same. Many people are against the war and our military policy, but we've learned to separate the policy from the soldiers who carry it out. And I no longer view every soldier as a nameless part of a military monolith.

So I was a different person as I stood with my daughter last December, awaiting her husband and a planeload of soldiers returning to Fort Bliss in El Paso. Since my daughter joined the military community, she has opened my eyes to the military lifestyle, as foreign to me as another planet. I have gained some understanding of the choice to serve -- made by each individual soldier. And I've learned to respect and appreciate the sacrifices made by every person in a military family.

Surrounded by the families of soldiers, I thought back to all the other families who stood waiting for their soldiers, as far back in American history as the Revolutionary War. Being part of this group made me deeply grateful for the patriotism of these families, I felt honored and privileged to stand among their ranks as a witness to this homecoming.

My son in law is one of the lucky ones. He came home safe, into the waiting arms of his wife. Some had no one to meet them. Some came home missing limbs. Some never will come home.

That same scene is playing right now on military bases around the country. And I can't forget where I was at this same time last year. I can't forget the faces, so grateful to be back on American soil.

While Obama will hopefully work to bring all our troops home as soon as possible, meanwhile they're still over there. And more are headed back , including my son-in-law's brigade, scheduled to deploy again this spring.

While we on the homefront are in the midst of an ailing economy, post election euphoria and holiday season, the troops are thousands of miles away from all of that---and all of us. They need us to remember them long after the Christmas decorations come down. As they serve us, we can serve them:
Don't forget those who come home broken and battered.
Don't forget those who are stll there.
Don't forget.

Follow Darryle Pollack on Twitter: www.twitter.com/DarryleP

Comments

[juliesimon]

Hi Darryle --
It's been a long time! Harold Pincus told me about your blog, and mentioned that your son-in-law is in the military. My son, Josh, just graduated from Marine Boot Camp, and it's been a long, sometimes difficult road for us. He has always wanted to be in the military, special forces, but I resisted the idea of the Marine Corps until he turned too old for me to control. Since he left for Parris Island, on his 21st birthday, Sept. 22nd, we have learned of this remarkable military family -- so incredibly supportive, helpful and full of information for newbie parents like us. His experience could not have been better. He had an inspirational Senior Drill Instructor, and he has emerged a man. While we're still nervous about his experiences to come, we know we have an online home to support our anxieties. I was thrilled to read this post, and will read more. Great to catch up with you. I saw Paul and Carla at our reunion. Send me an email if you get a chance.
Best,
Julie Catsman Simon

[phinney]

People come into our lives for a reason, to teach us some lesson in life.

__________­__________­__________­_________

I have been on both sides of a military homecoming. I've manned the rails frantically searching for my husband on the pier. And I have delivered my husband to a military base in the early morning. He disappeared in a sea of military fatigues. Eight months pregnant with 2 small boys. I get a lump in my throat just thinking about it.

[amkaylor]

With service members beginning to return home, and hopefully with more returning home with our new administration, it is important to remember that despite being home, they still need our support. There is a new website, Joining Forces America (www.joiningforcesamerica.org) that serves as a portal for family, friends, and service members to tell people what they need most.

Thank you to all the service members and their families who sacrifice so much.

[citronr]

Anyone that has ever been there at an airport watching the troops come home, or been on post watching them get off the bus knows this moment. You've captured your own perfectly. For those of you readers that have no one in the military deployed overseas, I ask you to pause for a moment the next time a returning soldier passes by at an airport. Look at those faces, look at the faces of those waiting for them. You're looking into the eyes of once pretty ordinary people now rather suddenly living extraordinary lives, far too invisible to many of the rest of us. You may not be able to share that exquisite moment as personally as the husbands, wives, sons, daughters, brothers, sisters and yes, mothers-in-law, that are there to greet them, but you can offer a warm smile, a kind wave, a knowing nod and a quiet thank you. You have no idea how much that will mean to them. And to you. Thank you Darryle, for this piece.