Dear Gov. Palin

Dear Gov. Palin,

Congratulations on your performance tonight. You were comfortable, composed, and deft with the zingers, and there's no question you're easy on the eyes (you know, for a 44-year-old woman.) Still, I'm guessing I'm not the only American who was hoping you might talk a little more substantively about your passionate stance on the issues. You know, like reproductive rights.

You see, my daughter started middle school this week (an event I apparently found a lot more traumatic than she did) and with my only child on the verge of adolescence, my parental anxieties have started to fixate on dark thoughts of the inevitability of (ugh) boys. I know what boys are like. I was one once. And thus, I hope my daughter stays away from them as long as possible.

But she won't forever, and so in addition to what we teach her at home, I want my daughter to receive a medically accurate sex education at school. And while I sure hope she abstains until she's away at college (where thankfully, I'll never know about it), if, like the majority of teenagers, she does decide to become sexually active, I want her to have convenient access to effective birth control, emergency contraception, and God forbid, even the opportunity to safely terminate a pregnancy, should she so choose.

Now, I know that you believe that every human life is sacred from the very moment of conception, and I respect your beliefs, but as a fellow parent I would hope that you would respect my belief that arrogant theocrats like you should stay the fuck out of our schools, and out of the private life of my child with your abstinence-only, Christianist voodoo. Perhaps keeping the baby and marrying her beer-swigging dickweed of a boyfriend is the right choice for your 17-year-old daughter--who am I to question her decision? But I don't want my daughter to ever have to make that awful choice.

The very thought of some (ugh) boy despoiling my beautiful little girl cuts me like a knife through the heart, but I'm realistic enough to know that it's eventually going to happen, so when it does I want to be damn sure that there is plenty of sturdy, cold latex encasing his undeserving cock. (And I hope it greatly diminishes his pleasure.) You may consider my permissive attitude indicative of the moral decline of the secular left, but then, how's all your sexual moralizing working out for you and your family, huh?

Best of luck on the rest of your campaign; I hope you enjoy explaining to American voters why you vehemently oppose legal abortion, even in the event of rape or incest, or to save the life of the mother.

Respectfully yours,

Goldy

[David Goldstein blogs on WA state politics at HorsesAss.org]

Read more analysis from HuffPost bloggers on John McCain's running mate, Sarah Palin

Comments

[quadman]

"I would hope that you would respect my belief that arrogant theocrats like you should stay the f**k out of our schools, and out of the private life of my child with your abstinence-only, Christianist voodoo. Perhaps keeping the baby and marrying her beer-swigging d**kweed of a boyfriend is the right choice for your 17-year-old daughter--who am I to question her decision?"

With your 'tolerance' on display like this, I am left wondering how your daughter is impacted by this bile from an anti-christian b i g o t.

[David Goldstein - Huffpost Blogger]

I am not anti-Christian. I'm anti-Christianist.

[destinycs79]

YOU ARE DEAD ON!

[kgb999]

It's called the "Promise ring and a prayer method"

[Jonny38103]

Too many Americans just don't believe in freedom unless it looks just like them. Without choice, there is no freedom.

[chosenson]

Thank you for saying what we all WANT to say.

[sociocanuck]

Is it wrong that I was so amused - especially by every "(ugh) boy"?!?

[KansasKowboy]

Right on David. The conservative, christian right = HYPOCRISY

[Kirk59]

The irony of the "Christian Right" is that this very system of government we live under was created specifically to prevent the rise to power of such groups. Perhaps that is why their most radical elements seek to secede from it or overthrow it. They conflate Christianity and the "founding fathers" when in reality most of our founders were deists or atheists. True, the Pilgrims were similar in many of their beliefs, but they predate the republic by over 100 years, and were, after all, escaping Europe so they could freely practice their religion. The less educated among us can be convinced that it is only in modern times that we have turned away from Christianity and that establishing some kind of theocracy would be a return to our founding principles, when in fact, it would represent the opposite. These very "Christians" would have the heads of Jefferson, Adams, and Paine on pikes if they were alive today.

[GOP4MoreTears]

This post might not be eloquent, but it;s well said and spot-on! Kudos David.

[dnels14]

THE FACTS: Palin implies that construction has begun on a major natural gas pipeline from the top of Alaska into Canada. That is not correct.

In fact, no building has begun and actual construction is years away, if it ever happens. This summer the Alaska Legislature, at Palin's request, passed a bill under which the state will issue a "license" to a Canadian energy company, TransCanada Corp., and pay it up to $500 million as an incentive to someday build this enormous project, which Alaska politicians have long sought with little success. The license is not a construction contract, and federal energy regulators have not yet approved the project.
Palin also puts the price tag for the project at $40 billion, an exaggeration. This is roughly $10 billion more than most cost estimates industry players and consultants have made to date.

[RallyGrrrl]

Sarah Palin is Cordelia Chase to Hillary Clinton's Buffy Summers.

(Buffy, The Vampire Slayer reference, if you didn't know.)

[JohnBryansFontaine]

I understand that Bristol's school taught abstinence only sex-ed.
Hypocrisy
Hypocrisy
Hypocrisy
Hypocrisy
Hypocrisy
Hypocrisy

[gitnu]

The insulting, profane , morally decadent views of David Goldstein are one more reason (as if I needed any more) to vote McCain-Palin.

[RGT333]

I really dont want to discuss her child, she needs to be sounded out on the important issues to the United States. In that related line, I do have concern about her position on education of our youth. Concealing truth about sex from the young really doesnt work well, especially when getting close to the truth is natural and will occur...pe­riod. IF she does not understand, she should watch MTV or VH1 sometime and see what many kids do and talk about nowadays.
Perhaps with a little celebration of the Creator's creation by educating our youth on how the created creation works, children would not be having children. Just a thought.

[OldPedagogue]

Thank you !!!!

[foomonkey]

i love the preaching of small government, that government should not interfere with our lives... yet, she and other conservatives have no problem pushing regulation of my life based on their personal beliefs. the arrogance and hypocrisy is amazing ...

all at the same time they are screaming about the elite!

amazing...