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David Henry Sterry

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Shame on Joe Paterno & Penn State & a Plea to Abused Kids From a Rape Survivor

Posted: 11/10/11 01:55 PM ET

I was raped. By a large, athletic, violent man. I was young, naïve, and defenseless. Being the victim of this unspeakable violence destroyed the kid I was. Every single day I am internally tortured by this abuse I survived over three decades ago. I became a drug addict. I tormented everyone who was stupid enough to love me. It took me years, decades, just to be able to function without indulging in self-destructive behavior on a daily basis. I was lucky. I had a family that stuck by me. I had resources to eventually get help. I healed myself with the help of a hypnotherapist, writing about my abuse and telling my story, and the love of a good woman. But I vowed that I would try, in whatever small way I could, to speak for boys and girls who are not as fortunate as myself. Who don't have the resources and love in their lives. Needless to say, I was greatly affected by the news that Jerry Sandusky, a man who built an organization that purported to help kids, has been charged with violently and sexually abusing them. There are even reports that he pimped them out to other adults, in order to further his own apparently grotesque needs. I'm filled with rage. I want him to suffer as he made these defenseless boys suffer. I'm filled with fury at Joe Paterno and the other officials at Penn State University, who were complicit in this horrible alleged abuse. Who helped to hide this monster. He is every bit as guilty as the man who actually allegedly perpetrated these deeds of shocking cruelty. I'm filled with disgust for the fans of Penn State who continue to stand by men who allegedly enabled pedophiles. Why aren't they in the streets expressing solidarity with those boys whose lives were ruined? Why aren't they in the streets expressing outrage that men who pretended to have the best interests of boys in their hearts, were actually hiding and enabling the most vile creature imaginable? But mostly I'm filled with sadness for these boys who suffered so miserably at the hands of adults. I want to help. I want to tell these boys, these young men, the survivors, but they are not alone. They can get help. They need to tell their stories. If there's anything I can do, please just let me know.

 
 
 

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11:58 AM on 11/17/2011
YES! YES! I concur! I too am appalled and outraged at this whole thing. Thank you David for voicing the rage I’m sure many of us feel in our hearts. As one who bears the scars of violation and rape, and maybe still a bleeding wound or two; I believe this qualifies as one of the greatest crimes against humanity. A very close runner up is the crime of apathy and denial from those who condone it or choose to look the other way.
01:23 PM on 11/14/2011
Compelling and emotional piece. Thanks so much for sharing.
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David Henry Sterry
02:48 PM on 11/15/2011
thank you ever so much!
12:56 PM on 11/12/2011
"Suffer not the little children" wasnt that something someone named Jesus tried to teach us? I'm not a hard core Christian but you got to admit he knew what he was talking about...
03:37 AM on 11/12/2011
Mr. Sterry, I join you with your call to all the survivors out there to come forward out of the dark secret shame we all carry. I, too, was raped and sexually abused as a boy. I've been dealing with the effects of that horror for 42 long years. You are not alone. I am not alone. These boys & all the rest of the boys out there are not alone. If nothing else comes out of this tragedy, at least we can hope that more survivors of sexual abuse come forward & get the healing they so need and deserve. I actually joined a male survivor group this week because of this situation, I finally realized I was not helping myself or anyone else by staying silent. Thank you for your brave call to all of us. We have nothing to be ashamed and we need to join together and help each other heal.
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David Henry Sterry
09:53 AM on 11/12/2011
thanks chet, your words were a boon to me, make me feel less alone in this world.
11:07 AM on 11/12/2011
As your words did for me, David. I was too tired last night, but this morning, I clicked on your bio & book links. I'm blown away! I, too, sold my body & soul on the streets. For me, it was when I was 12-15 years old, until I became 'too old' for the pedophiles to be interested in passing me around among themselves any longer. Thanks for being here for all of us.
06:34 PM on 11/11/2011
I am embarrassed by my Alma Mater. I am disgusted by the horrid acts of child sexual abuse which were not appropriately reported by university officials. I am frustrated by the lack of openness about terminating Mr. Paterno.

Why the rush to terminate Paterno, who was not charged with any crime (and who cooperated fully with the investigation), and keep Mr. Curley, who was charged with both perjury and failure to report a crime, and continue to pay his legal bills?

Why does the Board of Trustees not reveal their decision-making process at a press conference?

While I agree that Mr. Paterno needed to leave the university, the process in which this took place is both absurd and unfortunate.

The Board of Trustees currently lacks the transparency essential for building an ethical culture at Penn State.

Does anyone at Penn State know how to manage this crisis properly?

Does anyone at Penn State know how to start building a culture of ethics at an institute of higher learning?
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David Henry Sterry
10:00 AM on 11/12/2011
i personally think, & i have no proof of this, that some on the board are also culpable in the cover up. I agree their lack of transparency is deplorable.
02:24 PM on 11/13/2011
He cooperated after a grand jury questioned him. I understand people thought JoePa should have gotten more than a phone call to fire him. But that 10 year old boy deserved more than a passing glance by McQueary. More than a mere mention to JoePa's "supervisors". That child deserved for someone to step in and help him. Joepa, Mcqueary, Schulz, Curley and Spanier have gotten more than they could ever possibly deserve in life. Too bad they didn't feel it necessary to return the favor and save a child!
05:54 PM on 11/11/2011
That's the most courageous writing I have seen in a long, long, long, time.
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David Henry Sterry
09:53 AM on 11/12/2011
thanx patrick!
04:33 PM on 11/11/2011
I'm gonna risk speaking my mind on this article, even with the odds of getting passed the mod squad being next to nil...

This story has become another media circus, with a sideshow that features people like Joe Paterno, who in fact never molested anyone, witnessed not a damned thing, reported a dated story that was told to him in the third person to the proper authorities, thus following procedures to the letter.

But there must be a necktie party because the media loves leading an angry, frenzied mob to the courthouse steps to drag the accused, not the guilty, just the accused, to the nearest tree.

The media, the fourth estate, the free press, controls public access to itself, too. So... this comment is already in a death spiral to the trash can.

It's really very, very convenient.
05:14 PM on 11/11/2011
http://articles.philly.com/2011-11-10/news/30382450_1_grand-jury-molested-jerry-sandusky

Sandusky was hauling kids around the country when he was a coach. It's beyond me how people find it normal or acceptable for this guy to be taking young boys on trips. All those years, and no one ever raised an eyebrow?? Come on!! They hid it, like many Churches have done, the Penn State Temple hid this. Paterno is no fool, he turned a blind eye, hid his head in the sand like everyone else around this guy. Imagine how uncomfortable the thought must of been. They should of of been thinking about the pain he was causing in comparison. No way, no way, someone did not have a suspicion. Subject to criminal charges or not, anyone remotely close to his is going to feel the pain, walls will crumble and they should. Some of these boy will not recover and my heart aches for them.
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David Henry Sterry
09:59 AM on 11/12/2011
thanks eric, that is right on the money!
03:24 AM on 11/12/2011
"Joe Paterno, who in fact never molested anyone, witnessed not a damned thing, reported a dated story that was told to him in the third person to the proper authoritie­s, thus following procedures to the letter."

Arx Ferrum, please get your facts right at the very least. Joe Paterno was informed of this by an eyewitness, Mike McQueary (whom he knew well, by the way) the very NEXT day. I would hardly call that a 'dated story'.

Furthermore, Paterno did NOT report this to the proper authorities, (the police), he reported it to his boss, Tim Curley, Penn State Athletic Director. Paterno's boss, the athletic director was hardly the 'proper authority' to deal with a criminal matter.

So, this has nothing to do with whatever notions you have about the media & mobs. It's a very simple. clear-cut case of many people failing to perform their legal & moral duties. Let's not distract ourselves from the plain truth.
02:27 PM on 11/13/2011
Many acts of abuse aren't witnessed firsthand. Does that mean survivors should be SOL because nobody observed it? Give me a break dude. JoePa owed it to that child. Instead he protected his "friend". Or really himself.
04:15 PM on 11/11/2011
The abuse of children is a horrible thing no matter who does it, where or when it happens, etc. Unfortunately, we don't have all the facts. Jerry Sandusky is the guilty one. The rest of the "involved" individuals are being tried in the media. At this point, no one really knows what was said to whom. Joe Paterno is a good man. Let's give him a chance to speak before we fully pass judgement on him. The investigation will unfold the truth.
08:31 PM on 11/11/2011
Read the Grand Jury indictment to see what Paterno ADMITTED. He knew enough to call the police, or to make someone else call the police, or to ask why Sandusky was still around and what happened.
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David Henry Sterry
09:58 AM on 11/12/2011
patrick is right. Paterno the pedophile protector admitted he didn't do everything he should have. If he's such a good man, why didn't he do everything in his power to help these kids who's lives were ruined?
02:28 PM on 11/13/2011
He also admits that with this hindsight, he should have done more. Better than my mom who still hasn't admitted she should have done something.