David Weinberger

David Weinberger

Posted: September 28, 2008 09:24 PM

Top 10 Reasons Sarah Palin Cancels the Debate

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10. Suspicious Russian tourists spotted across the Bering strait in Dezhnevo

9. Wrasslin' a bear

8. Learns Tina Fey will be watching

7. When taken on tour of White House by McCain handlers, is "inadvertently" locked in Cheney's man-sized safe

6. Schedule for memorizing state capitals thrown off by need for new schedule to memorize states

5. Speechless after finally looking up what "MILF" stands for

4. On deadline to finish her book, Namin' Your Baby the Alaskan Way

3. Needs more time to really nail those hilarious hair-plug zingers

2. No matter how hard she scrubs, she can't get Kissinger's moral stank off of her

1. Stuck in traffic on the Bridge to Nowhere

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10. Suspicious Russian tourists spotted across the Bering strait in Dezhnevo 9. Wrasslin' a bear 8. Learns Tina Fey will be watching 7. When taken on tour of White House by McCain handlers, is "ina...
10. Suspicious Russian tourists spotted across the Bering strait in Dezhnevo 9. Wrasslin' a bear 8. Learns Tina Fey will be watching 7. When taken on tour of White House by McCain handlers, is "ina...
 
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- OldKnute I'm a Fan of OldKnute 108 fans permalink

10. Reviewing plans for a Missile Defense System for her porch.

9. Finding ways to explain away,, The Great Sumir,, having sewers, beer, aqueducts, weaving, writing, domesticated animals, castles and a calendar, 4,000 years before Adam and Eve.

8. Meeting with representatives from British Petroleum do discuss their next pipeline after Anwar is opened.

7. Pondering why Anwar was chosen for this area, the name being an Arabic word meaning heavenly lights or glowing.

6. Spending long hours in prayer to search for a way to convert all Muslims to Christ.

5. Planning for the baptism of 1.3 Billion Muslims.

4. Developing plans for the restocking libraries after all books written by Gays, Jews, Muslims, Catholics, Socialists, Communists or Secular Humanists, Philosophers, and scientific minded Heretics have been removed.

3. Working on redecorating schemes for the buildings once occupied by Museums of Natural History from Maine to San Diego, paying special attentions to cementing over the La Brea Tar Pits.

2. Exploring the possibility that Guantanamo Bay could be turned into a reeducation camp for former Paleontologist.

1. Doing Gods work on earth, and drafting a National Home School curriculum.

All the best

Knute Neo-LIB

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 09:19 AM on 09/30/2008
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10. Reviewing plans for a Missile Defense System for her porch. - The McSame campaign could lean on the Wasilla city council for a zoning variance and she can have an actual SILO in her backyard.

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 06:35 PM on 10/01/2008
- lordmi I'm a Fan of lordmi 9 fans permalink
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She has no brains, no question about it.
BUT - does McCain still have any?

does not look like

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 03:01 AM on 09/30/2008

Somebody should ask her why she pronounces 'nuclear" as "nucular."
Makes me worry about her general understanding of the USA vs. Russian atomic arsenals:

WATCH THE VIDEO:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=abZLjIpHzj8

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 01:07 AM on 09/30/2008
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I have to defend the pronounciation. Many well-educated people say it like this. Jimmy Carter for starters and he had a DEGREE in it!

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 02:09 AM on 09/30/2008

If I remember, Jimmy Carter was urged by his advisors to pronounce it that way to make him seem less intelligent *sigh* and better connect to the people.

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 10:15 AM on 09/30/2008

hahahaha #5 caught me off guard.

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 12:22 AM on 09/30/2008
- MizK I'm a Fan of MizK 8 fans permalink
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11. Can't decide which sash to wear to the debates. Should she choose the Vice President Palin one or should she hold out for the President Palin one?

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 12:01 AM on 09/30/2008

Number " 8: Learns Tina Fey is watching" should add "with the VOLUME ON".

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 01:56 PM on 09/29/2008
- JPD620 I'm a Fan of JPD620 2 fans permalink

Well, I would just like someone of slightly above average intelligence, this woman WOW. Her responses when questioned make women look silly (And YES if elected she would b representative of American women) . If I was a female I WOULD NOT vote for her. Both my mother and fiance cannot relate to her and most women with at least half a brain cannot either. I dont see the point in voting for a woman who will hinder womens rights.

1. Has to campaign to "End Womens Suffrage".

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 01:21 PM on 09/29/2008
- Bananafarm I'm a Fan of Bananafarm 3 fans permalink
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Once again, this xkcd comic is relevant. http://xkcd.com/385/ Why is it that if a woman is an idiot she represents all men, but if a man is an idiot he represents himself? No, she would not be representative of all American women. She wouldn't represent me or any other woman with a working brain.

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 03:14 PM on 09/29/2008
- jcrush I'm a Fan of jcrush 10 fans permalink
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Right on sister.

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 12:51 AM on 09/30/2008
- Jonny38103 I'm a Fan of Jonny38103 10 fans permalink

11. Schedule conflict with appearance on Jerry Springer.

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 01:09 PM on 09/29/2008

How long must poor John "Hero" McCain endure this long Palinoscopy?

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 12:25 PM on 09/29/2008
- marchamlin I'm a Fan of marchamlin 5 fans permalink

Wonderful.

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 12:52 PM on 09/29/2008
- CtJean I'm a Fan of CtJean 9 fans permalink

Until his eyes cross!

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 01:03 PM on 09/29/2008

I understand that folks can relate to Sarah Palin on a personal level, but I wonder why we don't want a vice president (or president, remember that 8 presidents have died in office, and Mr. McCain is 72) who is smarter than us? I think the goal should be to have a president who has experienced hardship, but has worked hard to get an excellent education, has worked in the real world with real people, and has a stable and loving family. This describes Obama--single mom and working class grandparents, attended great schools and excelled, worked in both law firms and as a community organizer, and has a normal, committed, family life. Contrasted with Sen. McCain, who grew up well to do, graduated nearly last in his college class, has no "real world" work experience besides the service and the Senate, and has a checkered marriage history (he divorced his first wife after she was disabled in an accident and married the heiress he was cheating with). Then, compare the vice presidential candidates: Palin, who has taken on the challenge of a presidential campaign even with an infant with Down's syndrome and a pregnant teen daughter (family values??) versus Biden, who has takent the train home every day from Washington to Delaware to be with his sons since he lost his first wife (family values!!). I hope that when Americans look past the folksy language and the gee-whiz demeanor they'll agree O/B are more "realatable".

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 12:11 PM on 09/29/2008
- Gingersp I'm a Fan of Gingersp 17 fans permalink

I don't vote for someone I can "relate" to. I want someone who is smarter than I am for this job. The Americans elected GW Bush because he was "someone they'd want to have a beer with" rather than Al Gore who had a somewhat stiff demeanor. I'll take the stiffness any day!!!!

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 12:20 PM on 09/29/2008
- marchamlin I'm a Fan of marchamlin 5 fans permalink

They wanted to have a beer with a guy who quit drinking years before the election! Now that's dumb.

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 12:54 PM on 09/29/2008

Fwiw, more respondents said they'd rather watch football with Obama.

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 04:03 PM on 09/29/2008
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Unfortunately for us and the rest of the world, there are many people voting in the US who believe they can do a job better than those who've spent many years preparing for it. They believe John McCain and Sarah Palin will give them credence -- just like they thought George W. Bush would.

The irony is, many of these people are the same who try to characterize Blacks as lazy. Yet they won't even educate themselves for the work they're pursuing. They don't believe they need to because they say, "I've gotten this far in life without any formal education" and "Bill Gates did it"!

However in this election, I must admit that I'm voting for the candidate I can most relate to. It seems Obama and I share many of the same ideals.

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 02:05 PM on 09/29/2008
- Bompa I'm a Fan of Bompa 8 fans permalink
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It is very simple to me... I am fed up with having STUPID people running the show! I want the smartest, brightest guy we can find...WHO IS WILLING to put up with the crap that comes with the deal. The process we put our "leaders" through creates ego centric power freaks for the most part.
If the really smart guy is willing.. ELECT THE SMART GUY.. we have seen what the alternative looks like and look where it got us!

OBAMA /BIDEN!

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 05:46 PM on 09/29/2008
- TennGal I'm a Fan of TennGal 2 fans permalink
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I don't want my leaders to be just like me. i want them smarter than me...I want them more worldly than me...I want them more thoughtful than me. Would I like them to be someone I could have a beer with? Sure I would because I like drinking and having a challenging conversation that would exposed me to the riches offered in hearing that person's life experiences. Hear how they are going to help me achieve my American dream.

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 01:04 AM on 09/30/2008

Unfortunately, Joe Biden is lacking in the mental department as well. Graduated 76/85 from U. of Delaware. But, since Obama is so young, he is less of a concern. However, can you imagine the gaffe machine that is Biden becoming President? He would be more embarrassing than Ford was.

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 01:45 PM on 09/30/2008

8. Learns Tin Fey will be watching (WITH THE SOUND ON)

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 12:04 PM on 09/29/2008
- ElBruce I'm a Fan of ElBruce 19 fans permalink
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84. Still picking out just the right swimsuit to wear.

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 11:18 AM on 09/29/2008
- cycle3man I'm a Fan of cycle3man 16 fans permalink

I guess Sarah has fully recovered from "THE BRAIN TRANSPLANT"

Wonder if she still has that strong desire to shoot bears and Carabo
from the helicopter?

I hope she still keeps her eye out for the Russians!

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 11:05 AM on 09/29/2008
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#5 Should read G..I..L..F

Just sayin'

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 10:33 AM on 09/29/2008
- Hufferton I'm a Fan of Hufferton 5 fans permalink

Uh, JS, is that G meaning a Girl ,or a Goof, or whatever?

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 02:53 PM on 09/29/2008
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Grandma

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 01:42 AM on 09/30/2008

No, that would be "Governor"

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 12:29 AM on 10/01/2008
- kelfeind I'm a Fan of kelfeind 2 fans permalink

Brilliant!

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 10:18 AM on 09/29/2008
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