I get so many female clients who are over 35 and divorced who come to me operating under the assumption that they are at an automatic dating disadvantage because of their age. They tell me how frustrated they are trying to date being in the "over 35" age group.
Let me tell you something. They could not be more wrong. The biggest problem that these women have is not their age, but their mindset. So to any women who are in this demographic and feel like these women do about dating as an "over 35," here are five of the best ways to meet men if you are over 35.
1. If You Believe It Then It's True: Do you remember the famous Henry Ford quote "Whether you think you can, or that you can't, you are usually right?" I have found that you can meet amazing people anywhere and at any age. It's all about having an abundance mindset. So many people listen to their friends or the monkey chatter in their own head telling them all the obstacles that stand in their way as a single woman over the age of 35. Many times this comes from other single friends.
I don't listen to friends like this, because I find that many singles have attitudes that are just ridiculous. They love to buy into the negative, instead of the positive. I hear so many people who live in Los Angeles tell me that Los Angeles is the worst place to date if you're a woman over 35. Really?! It's the biggest city in the country and there's no one to meet if you're a woman over 35? C'mon!
What happens is that people will manifest the things on which they focus. So if women are focusing on disappointment, scarcity and failure in their dating life, then that's what they are going to experience in their dating life. I have found that you can always find someone who will agree with you when you are looking for confirmation about something negative because most people are negative. Most people love to commiserate, and most people really like having others commiserate with them. So the first thing you need to do is to change your mindset.
2. Take A Good Look At Yourself: I want to give you a little bit of a wake-up call. I want to challenge you to look deep inside your life. If you have had trouble meeting men, I want you to ask yourself if you've really done enough on your part to meet them.
Just like I tell singles of any age, your perfect person is not just going to show up at your doorstep one day with flowers and a bottle of wine in hand. You need to be proactive. So I want you to ask yourself if you've done enough. Have you really networked as much as you can? Have you gone on a great online dating site, wrote a really good profile and started contacting some men online? Have you researched what things are going on in your area to which you could go?
Have you truly done everything you possibly can do, because I seriously doubt that there are no men in their 40s that you can date. I just think that you've been frustrated, and you've let that get to you. It happens to a lot of single people . . . but take time now to "reset" and regroup.
3. Do Your Research: The next thing to do is to do a little "homework." Do some research and find out what things are going on and available in your area. See what things are interesting to you. Don't choose things you have no personal interest in just because you think there might be men there to meet. You will not only have more fun, but will also be most successful meeting people, when you are enjoying your life and creating good energy. At the same time, though, be open to lots of possibilities.
Here are some ideas for you to research. Try finding out about happy hours that are out there for people in their 40s. Consider speed dating events. Try having lunch in areas where there are hospitals where you can meet doctors. Go where lawyers are hanging out around lunchtime or during happy hours. Have you thought about going to car dealerships? Many of the high-end ones actually have parties. Go to one and tell them you'd love to come to one of their parties when they have new car releases. There's networking events like Toastmasters where people will go and they will speak. There are fundraisers. Think outside the box and get researching.
4. Make A List: So, I'm challenging you right now to put together a list. Find at least ten places you can go or ten things you can do in your town other than what I've suggested. I had a client one time who actually went to hospital and had lunch every single day because she wanted to meet a doctor. Sure enough, after two and-a-half months she did meet a doctor. It's all about pursuing what you want and taking the steps to get it.
5. Get Out There!: Now that we've talked about your mindset, had you do some research and even had you make a list, the only thing left to do is to actually get yourself out there and start meeting people. Life is in the field. Life is about enjoying the moment. Nothing happens for those who sit and wait though. So challenge yourself to take action every day. You won't believe what is waiting out there for you!
Following these five tips will get you well on your way to meeting lots of men. For all of the women who are over 35, there are tons of amazing and available men out there for you to meet. Think abundance and you will find them.
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