Use 'Your Story and Language' Wisely: For the Sake Of Your Business!

03/31/2015 02:31 pm ET | Updated May 31, 2015

Yes, I know what you have been taught: you MUST develop a story--your story! A few situations where you can say to your audience "I feel your pain, I know, I have been there..." Okay, all is good with this, right?

If your story is the equivalent of "War & Peace," please attach it to your website and direct people there or sell it on Amazon as a book.

I have lost count of how many people I see losing customers and money everyday because of this "story" fiasco! When I get on a webinar for 1 hour and the first 30 minutes are spent on the presenter's story beginning from the moment of conception, I am gone forever--and I mean forever! I am sick to death of this waste of time; my time is precious and should be respected.

Truth be known, I really don't care about anyone's story. I care about how they might help me with a problem I need solved! I would not be on that webinar in the first place if I hadn't found some type of common ground, or didn't believe the presenter knows something I can benefit from or need, and which he or she might have the capacity to teach me. It is really that simple!

If you have bought into this idea that a story is a must, I encourage you to reconsider. If you are competent and know your topic, please do not worry about "THE STORY!" It is disheartening to see people fabricating a story to make this mysterious connection with their potential customers. Most of these stories go on "Ad Nauseam" to the point of your customer screaming "UNCLE" I surrender, just make it stop. Nobody needs you to have had the same life experience they have. Moreover, none of the good, bad or the ugly is required to gain business.

Creating and crafting "The Story" has become a cottage industry. But is it really necessary to play on people's emotions? No, I stand by the idea that it is not. Instead, just tell people what you can do for them--that is all you need to do! How can you help them? Simple.

This silly story thing is holding back many talented online marketers and educators, as they believe they need an incredible story to get the attention of the marketplace. I want them to understand it is a blessing if you were raised by two loving parents, attended an Ivy League University on scholarship, worked at the school bookstore, bought your first car and just made a down payment on your first home. You do not need to have been through tragedy or lived life as a hobo, scraping off the land for food for the last 3 years before breaking the code on some internet sales technique. Yes, these stories are entertaining and inspiring, but not required for success.

If that is your life, great! If it isn't, then know it is perfectly fine. I want to eradicate the idea you have to have some crazy "HERO" story before you get started. This mind set is causing people to make up events, many of which live on the borders of being a big fat lie.

My Moms Best Practices Tip: Be You. Be Proud. Be The Original You Are. No Reproductions Allowed.

And since we are discussing this concept of authenticity, let's also address this idea that "cursing" in your copy is revealing your authentic self. While that may be true, do you really want your customers to know you are experiencing "arrested vocabulary?" Do you really believe this is attracting your "ideal client?" Maybe it is. However, have you ever thought about how many people in need of your services are being repelled with this type of language? It is just simply insane to think you are doing good business and contributing to the higher good of the world.

I know this may not be a popular stance to take, as the cursing seems to have become more and more prevalent in the marketplace, but I ask you to read with an open mind and a bit of reflection. I actually struggle with my mouth and revert back to using cuss words to express myself in real live speech. This is a terrible habit that I work on constantly. However, in business I keep my language in check for one simple reason: once you put these words in your content on the internet, there is little room for retraction. It is there forever, as we all know. Additionally, cursing certainly doesn't make anyone look smart, articulate or creative. It comes from the lowest denominator known as crude.

How sad to notice this "evolution" of what being "authentic" means--which, in the last six months, seems have shifted to equal crude, rude and crass. If this is your business model, I would highly consider an overhaul. In the long run, this will not serve you or your business.

In closing, I have no idea how these crazy concepts sweep the online world. Your personal story is you, it is perfect. There is no need to invent trials & tribulations that might push you to the edge of truth. Descriptive words are wonderful and they should be appropriate for all audiences! I would caution people to exercise good, polite common sense in business. So many times these things are difficult to undo. With that said, be you, just remember you do not need to share everything!