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Deborah Cruz
Deborah Cruz, @TruthfulMommy, is a freelance writer, passionate Latina wife and mother. She is the author of the popular lifestyle/parenting website The TRUTH about Motherhood. Deborah spends her days writing online and chauffeuring fiery little feminists between Catholic school and ballet, all while planning world social media domination in her head. She writes with honesty and integrity and while she has strong opinions, she knows they are not the only opinions.

Entries by Deborah Cruz

The Day My Life Changed Forever

(0) Comments | Posted October 16, 2014 | 4:58 PM

It was a sunny Monday morning. I had just dropped my 4-year-old off at preschool. I had approximately two hours to get to my OBs office and have her check me and tell me nothing was wrong. As I lay there alone on the cold, hard table in the ultrasound...

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(0) Comments | Posted February 6, 2014 | 12:50 PM

Miscarriage, I hate the very word. There is everything and there is nothing in that moment of delivery. I am shocked and stunned, as my soul quietly hoovers above my own body. I watch detached as my world falls apart, as my heart is ripped to shreds. I want to...

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Trash the Dress: Waste at Its Worst

(7) Comments | Posted January 8, 2014 | 12:16 PM


"Trash the dress" photo shoots are a popular trend in bridal photography that is gaining momentum. More and more brides are scheduling the coveted "trash the dress" photo shoot, which involves the bride posing for artistic photos that are more than...

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The French Government Bans Child Beauty Pageants and I Hope it Catches On

(4) Comments | Posted September 20, 2013 | 6:03 PM


I am trying to raise my girls to value themselves for who they are on the inside. I want them to value others for who they are on the inside. I don't want superficial, shallow children. The French Senate voted this week to

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FYI (If You're a Condescending Mom of Boys)

(84) Comments | Posted September 5, 2013 | 1:00 PM

Earlier today, I came across a blog post written by a blogger and mother titled, FYI ( if you're a teenage girl). To say I was flabbergasted would be an understatement. You see, I am the mother of two young girls and I take issue when another mother,...

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Miley Cyrus and Robin Thicke's Vulgarity Is a Symptom of Our Failing Society

(72) Comments | Posted August 27, 2013 | 1:21 PM

Okay, Miley Cyrus, I get it. You are not Hannah Montana. After last night's VMAs, everyone is wondering just what the hell went so wrong in Miley Cyrus' young life that warranted the We Can't Stop/Blurred Lines Mashup performance. Was she over the top? Absolutely. Was she embarrassingly crass on stage? For sure! Is she some sort of anomaly who has gone completely off her respective Disney rocker? I'm going to say, probably not. My bigger concern was Robin Thicke, 36, in a Beetlejuice suit pushing his junk up on a twerking Miley Cyrus, 20, and all the entire Internet blames her. It takes two to make things go that wrong.

In my opinion, Miley Cyrus is not doing anything worse than most girls her age on college campuses and in clubs all over the country are doing every weekend. The only difference between Miley and other 20-year-olds is that she is in the public eye and she used to be a Disney kid. You can't be a Disney kid for the rest of your life, even Annette Funicello got a little down and dirty with Frankie Avalon in those beach movies. I'm starting to feel like either there is a Disney curse imposed on all young stars. Really where else can you go on the moral spectrum but down after Disney?

Miley Cyrus twerking, I find mildly offensive mostly because she has no ass to speak of but then again, I find twerking in general to be in poor taste. The Chucky Cheese furry leotard she was wearing when she took the stage with all the gyrating teddy bears surrounding her was something nightmarish but did she really do anything worse than Lady Gaga, Britney Spears or Madonna? Hell, no. She just happens to be a little more in your face with her tongue hanging out about it.

Miley Cyrus seems to want to shed her Disney alter Hannah Montana so badly that she is willing to destroy herself in the process. Who could blame her? Honestly, who wants to be type cast as a crooning, saccharin southerner with a penchant for bubblegum snark and getting into I Love Lucy-like trouble, for the rest of your life?

She is growing up and is testing her boundaries. No matter what bad taste this performance left in your mouth, you have to consider two things 1) she didn't choreograph this fiasco herself and 2) everyone in the world is talking about the VMAs and Miley Cyrus this morning. Whether you think she is having a mega-meltdown or is the sanest young star in Hollywood ever, you will never forget that onstage performance. I'd say mission accomplished.

Robin Thicke is a married man more than 16 years Miley Cyrus' senior and a father; he should not have been pushing up onto a 20-year-old girl. But no one is saying anything about Robin Thicke's part in all of this. In fact, I've heard women come to his defense, insisting that Miley ruined his hit song Blurred with her onstage nastiness. Did the Beetlejuice suit give him pervert immunity?

Are we really such a woman-hating society that instead of considering for a moment that Miley Cyrus might need some parental guidance and love, we judge her with impunity? Shouldn't someone try to help get her back on track? Where are her parents? Where did her fiancé go? Doesn't she have any friends?

As someone whose already been through the finding yourself process, I know I did some stuff that I am not too proud of, only my "twerking phase" was not televised and exploited. It was limited to a few hundred people at a club or at a frat party but I made a lot of bad decisions; way worse than twerking and sticking my tongue out while dry humping a foam finger. As a woman, I know the early 20s is exactly when this happens. Freedom plus alcohol equals bad judgment.

As a mother, I know this can happen to even the best of children. Do I hope my girls don't go through this phase? Yes, I hope they bypass it all together. Will they? Probably not. Will I shame them and mock them? Never. Will I worry? Of course. But most of all, I will be there to catch them when they fall and probably not clapping at their public humiliation.

Miley Cyrus may have stepped over some invisible moral line. She made us all uncomfortable watching, but so did Robin Thicke. They were both on the stag performing and equally culpable. Miley Cyrus taking the brunt of the blowback is just a symptom of our society that tolerates and perpetuates rape culture.

What do you think of Miley Cyrus and Robin Thicke's onstage performance at the...

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