When God Tells You to Hate

The rise of incivility in this country is a symptom of mass psychopathology. Groups of people see other groups of people behaving badly, and this gives them permission to behave badly themselves. The same thing happens in families. If one child is allowed to throw a tantrum, refuse to pick up his toys, or talk back, the other children watch and imitate. Which doesn't mean that everyone in the family automatically loses control. The key is that boundaries have been crossed, and once that happens, it's hard to go back again. (This accounts in part for why abused children grow up to abuse their own children. They were raised not to recognize the boundary that protects a child from physical or emotional mistreatment.)

The abuse delivered by right-wing Christians is such an old story that we are long past irony. The Rev. Rick Warren has a record for trying to smooth the waters, but he also flirts with intolerance -- toward gay marriage, for instance -- and since his rationale is that a "loving" God shares the same prejudices, what's to stop others with worse tempers from following the same logic? When your God hates, you have permission to hate.

Since Jehovah is an expert hater in the Old Testament, urging his people to countless wars, the greatest attempt to recross that boundary comes in the New Testament, where Jesus preaches love and peace. His success, shall we say, has been limited. Christian violence is as old as the persecution of heretics, which began immediately after Constantine's conversion in 313 A.D. The impulse toward aggression, which is present in everyone, found a way to turn even the Prince of Peace into a hater.

If the story is old and universal, then the rise of incivility in our time displays behavior that cannot be eradicated. At best it is controlled. Sane, civil people have always been the gatekeepers of mature behavior and the teachers of morality. Sometimes their efforts go terribly astray, and the worst in human nature is allowed to have its way (these are the times described by Yeats as when "the center cannot hold"). Barack Obama's behavior comes from the center, and I don't mean just politically. He's a sane, civil adult who knows where his center is. We see our own maturity mirrored in him, but for a long time his predecessor was willful, petulant, arbitrary, and unchecked in his mistakes -- all the marks of serious immaturity, which is especially dangerous in a leader. It breeds not only incivility but wars.

At the same time, reactionary politics is rooted in incivility, having found its first success in the Seventies and Eighties by welcoming bigots, haters, the religious right, and the psychologically damaged to enter the arena of power brokers. The ultra-right fringe had long been excluded, and rightly so, from the central core of either party, being tolerated because a democracy must learn to tolerate the intolerant. Now the intolerant were told that their anger and repression were good things. Pres. Nixon had shown the way with his Southern strategy, a code name for racism, intolerance of hippies, and hatred of the anti-Vietnam movement.

The tactic didn't backfire, which struck a blow to any hope of civility in public discourse afterwards, and once a smooth talker like Ronald Reagan appeared, a shameful policy like allowing AIDS patients to die because, ultimately, they deserved it for their ungodly behavior, could be instituted. The result was that the right-wing base became used to promoting social injustice as a good thing. Fortunately, the outrageousness of Reagan's AIDS indifference led to strong, vocal opposition. Sane, civil adults do keep watch over misbehavior; they have done so during the entire reactionary shift in American politics.

What closed the circle of incivility is that the vociferous intolerance that continues to spew from the religious right and cultural conservatives set a tone that tempted their opponents to scream back. The hectoring left is much smaller than the hectoring right, which has thousands of radio stations at its beck and call, but it feels just as justified. What will stop this vicious circle of name-calling and invective? Not the arrival of a civil President. We already see stories about fringe preachers asking God for Obama's death.

To heal the ills of mass psychology, a shift in consciousness is needed. The problem exists at the level of human aggression. The solution exists at the level of human ideals. There are many ways to remind us of our ideals -- through families, churches, the political pulpit, and by example in public behavior. When more people realize that peace is better than war for everyone, the war of words will begin to end. It's happened before in America's history of inflammatory politics. The sane and civil among us will try to make it happen again.

Published in the Washington Post

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Comments

[skatoolaki]

One of the most beautiful posts I have ever read here - or anywhere for that matter. Mr. Chopra you have such a way of getting to the heart of the matter and helping us see hope in a positive and achievable manner. Thank you.

[Unity1122]

Mr. Chopra~

Thank you for your balanced words of observation and wisdom. I have often wondered where the voice of our "Elders" or "WisdomKeepers" are during this time of hate, prejudice and intolerance. Even amongst those that I consider WisdomKeepers, I have felt harshness, judgment and intolerance coming through their words. This saddens me, as once "that tone" is taken, it gives "the other side", no matter which side they be on, excuse and ammunition to strike back with the same ferocity and deaf ears.

"The other side" will not be able to locate their own inner balance until we quit attacking and clear from within our own selves the intolerance and judgment. I have often wished that our country had a non-political Wisdom Council of Elders that could speak with a wide ranging voice to lend balance to the arguments at hand from both sides. We then might be able to hear from "the middle" instead of being assaulted by the loudest voices from both sides that drown out reason and balance.

"Out beyond ideas of wrongdoing and rightdoing, there is a field. I'll meet you there."
RUMI

[Yumay]

As usual, a kind voice calling in the wilderness, preparing the way for a saner, gentler future. Deepak Chopra, your words in themselves have the power to soothe and heal. Wish everyone had eyes to read them.

[GirlOutWest]

Mr. Chopra you are one of my favorite authors/bloggers. I love the peaceful message you share. Having been a peace loving person my whole life I have noticed becoming more "snarky" of late. On occasion even a little mean and angry. The anonymity of commenting on blog sites is part of it I believe. I too believe the blogosphere /radio are encouraging hatefulness in our country, our world.
I will continue to read the political blogs but I will try to stay above the fray and remember your words. Those of us on the "left" must promote peace, unity and faith in each other.

[melodramy]

The sooner we realize that a "god" isn't telling anyone anything in any book or by telepathy, and that religion merely teaches one to assign one's personal proclivities, prejudices and internal musings to the will of a divinity, cultivating extreme individual narcissism and absolutism, the better able we will be to heal ourselves of this pathology, and re-center our conversations around what is best for human well-being, not around what most pleases a majority's "god."

As for Jesus being the one to try to "recross the boundary" by promoting love and peace; it's too bad he had to simultaneously introduce the world to a new and improved version of extreme violence straight from the loving father - an eternal agony in hell, reserved for those who don't adequately toe the line in thought, worship and deed. And if Paul was Jesus' number one appointed spokesperson post-mortem and Paul sought to suppress women and hated gays and unbelievers, he was speaking for Jesus too. A perfect storm of Christian hate is possible, permanently sanctifying these archaic human ravings as "a god's word." Why oh why, is anyone surprised at this outcome?

You would think that an all-wise all-good being of pure love flying down to our planet using his one brief appearance to speak to us in a few incohesive / repetitive chapters, would have foreseen this outcome and at least been all about "positive reinforcement" as the consistent model of behavior.