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Gunning It

Posted: 11/10/11 08:28 AM ET

Ever have a day that starts out fine but then, through some unexpected event, ends with you on an anti-gun, anti-corporate rant?

Yeah, last Monday was like that for me too.

It all started innocently enough. In the wake of an October storm that shut down much of our town, my son's school was closed and I was looking for something new and different to keep him entertained. I've had a weakness for Playmobil products ever since I discovered that each magical set contains perfect, tiny replicas of every animal, tool and vehicle you can imagine. Now that my son is old enough to know not to eat the pieces, we were off to the toy store.

I chose the Playmobil Forest Lodge, an Alpine-style chalet complete with a happy family of four. It looked peaceful and woodsy. Putting it together, I marveled at the miniature rocking chair, the bird's nest with eggs, and the pair of hedgehogs. The head of the toy family, who I'll call "Lederhosen Man" had a pair of teeny binoculars, which I assumed he would use to watch the flock of birds perched in the tree house.

As we opened each new bag of accessories, my son and I discovered a menagerie of animals. In addition to the hedgehogs and birds, there were mice small enough to live in the woodpile, squirrels, a chocolate lab with its own doghouse, and a fawn. There was even a veterinarian's kit and a bottle to feed a baby goat.

The entire thing reminded me of a scene out of "Heidi". My son started playing while I kept assembling.

Eager to see what else Playmobil had in store for us (I was secretly hoping for a couple of skunks and a badger), I opened the next bag and pulled out ... two hunting rifles.

Hunting rifles?

This was unexpected. Could it be that the binoculars were not for bird watching? Were they actually included so Lederhosen Man could locate the adorable baby deer and turn it into venison steaks?

Suddenly, "Heidi" morphed into "Bambi". I pocketed the guns before my son saw them and stuffed them in the trash.

Before I go any further, I should note the following: (1) the rifles were pictured on the back of the box, so Playmobil wasn't hiding them under the chalet floorboards, (2) the guns were not semi-automatic weapons (because, you know, that would be overkill), and (3) the lodge came furnished with a gun rack with a lock (apparently, it's never too early for four-year-olds to learn the importance of securing deadly weapons. Safety first!)

I think the locked gun rack sort of misses the point. Whatever your thoughts on gun control, hunting or the Second Amendment, can't we all agree that four-year-olds don't need toy hunting rifles? Even the NRA's gun safety program, led by the oddly cheerful Eddie the Eagle, teaches kids to stay away from guns, not to play with them.

I'd hope we could all stress this message with preschoolers, especially. Kids this young are unreliable little things. They are bad at keeping their hands to themselves and will bolt in front of cars to get a runaway ball. They don't fully understand the difference between real and pretend. They also have a limited ability to appreciate the consequences of their actions. (In that respect, they're not that different from teenagers.)

Do we really want these miniature people playing with guns, no matter how miniature the guns themselves are?

If preschoolers were capable of locking and loading, I think "Sesame Street" would have tackled this issue already. But you never see Bert and Ernie packing heat.

So why exactly were those two rifles a necessary part of the Forest Lodge?

Playmobil didn't provide a wolf pack that threatened Lederhosen Man and his perfect little family. Forest Lodge is stocked with baby animals and a rocking chair. Who or what is my little guy supposed to shoot?

Where I grew up, schools were closed on the first day of hunting season. I had friends who hunted and knew families for whom hunting was a tradition. I also knew families for whom bagging a deer meant the difference between going hungry and being able to feed their kids. I'm not naïve about guns. What I really hate, though, is the idea of a gun as a toy, especially with really little kids.

I can't imagine what Playmobil hoped kids would learn by including rifles in a play set for the under-six crowd. More importantly, what are we teaching them when we ask them to "play" with something that in real life can be lethal?

I spent most of that afternoon (and the next few) haranguing anyone within earshot about the surprise cache of weapons I discovered in my kid's new toy set. (After some thought, I abandoned my plan to picket Playmobil U.S.A. headquarters.) And I'll still buy more Playmobil products. They're a ton of fun. I have my eye on the underwater diving set -- although I will be checking for harpoons.

I'm just not buying any Playmobil toys that come with guns.

 

Follow Devon Corneal on Twitter: www.twitter.com/dcorneal

Ever have a day that starts out fine but then, through some unexpected event, ends with you on an anti-gun, anti-corporate rant? Yeah, last Monday was like that for me too. It all started innocent...
Ever have a day that starts out fine but then, through some unexpected event, ends with you on an anti-gun, anti-corporate rant? Yeah, last Monday was like that for me too. It all started innocent...
 
 
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irishdoc
It's not me..it's you. Really
11:42 PM on 11/13/2011
I think you missed an important opportunity to teach your child the appropriate thing to do if they find a gun ( Do not touch it, and immediately tell an adult). Guns are out there in society, I have several in my home, and it s unrealistic to expect that your child will never encounter one. Just as we teach our children about matches, drugs, and stranger danger, we also need to teach them about gun safety.
In addition, I think you missed the chance to explain to your child where food actually comes from. Children think food just comes from a store without realizing the this is not the case. I hope your not offended, but I think you missed the mark on this one.
11:22 AM on 11/13/2011
Does anyone hide the kitchen stove from their kids to keep them from possibly getting burned? NO? Why? Because it's a part of everyday life. Well, so too are guns. You may never allow them in your house but your kids have exposure to them. In games, history class, on TV, at a friend or neighbors, on the computer, and in the news cast. Unless you isolate your child from all society (even then they may FIND one) they will be exposed to guns in some manner. EDUCATE them about guns don't try to hide them or you'll be unsuccessful. Teach them to never assume a gun is unloaded until proven, and never assume a gun they see is a toy....too many look like the real thing anyway and even cops have trouble telling the difference on some.
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BigWillyG
12:49 AM on 11/13/2011
Wow, overreacting over 1 piece of plastic. Guess I've seen it all. Teaching your kid the difference between actual firearms and toys and some basic gun safety is a much better way to protect them then trying to "protect" them from tiny pieces of plastic.
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Rooster Coburn
Less Gov't + More Responsibility = A Better World
03:09 AM on 11/13/2011
"Ever have a day that starts out fine but then, through some unexpected event, ends with you on an anti-gun, anti-corporate rant?" No, I haven't actually, but if had gone out and spent good money on some junk gun that wouldn't shoot right I sure would.
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06:20 PM on 11/11/2011
"If preschoolers were capable of locking and loading, I think "Sesame Street" would have tackled this issue already. But you never see Bert and Ernie packing heat. "

http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_bHVsv6JPVHI/S_vI60BTacI/AAAAAAAABv0/Bpuq18GcLWQ/s1600/evil_muppets.jpg

(Almost) Never say never.
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Devon Corneal
09:54 PM on 11/11/2011
I don't know whether to laugh or cry!
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David Carson
04:53 PM on 11/12/2011
From what I see, you are overreacting and no better than the school districts that suspend a first grader for that six year old doodles or for kids pointing a finger and yelling "bang".
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mackbolan
Libertas inaestimabilis res est
05:43 PM on 11/12/2011
its obvious that you are confused...your continued support of playmobil with your dollars says tons about your actual level of anger...
01:39 PM on 11/12/2011
Good trigger discipline...either the creator knows the four cardinal rules of safe gun handling or the muppet doesn't have a finger long enough to actually use the handgun. :-)
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David Carson
05:04 PM on 11/12/2011
hopefully both--Sesame Street predates some of the PC silliness that is in schools now--I remember the boys counselor telling me to punch a bully when I was in 6th grade 40 years ago, and the only consquence of the one time I elbowed a kid that was harassing me in the library was a mild warning. Apparently the boy's father was pushing for punishment because I was bigger and stronger but the administration made it plain that the fact that I did not rise from the chair that the other boy was trying to tip/dump me out of--the fault was the other kids
01:11 PM on 11/11/2011
"I have my eye on the underwater diving set -- although I will be checking for harpoons."

Here's a report from my Hunter Education instructor information.
2009 injuries per 100,000 participants
Football: 2,557
Basketball: 1,996
Boxing: 1,870
Wrestling: 1,777
Soccer: 1,440
Skateboarding: 1,423
Bicycle Riding: 1,351
Baseball: 1,198
Snowboarding: 1,133
Softball: 1,101
Ice Hockey: 889
Cheerleading: 705
Martial Arts: 567
Volleyball: 475
SWIMMING: 328
Weight Lifting: 218
Fishing: 203
Water Skiing: 182
Tennis: 177
Golf: 162
Mountain Biking: 141
Mountain Climbing: 84
Archery: 67
Bowling: 50
Billiards: 17
HUNTING: 5
12:37 PM on 11/11/2011
"More importantly, what are we teaching them when we ask them to "play" with something that in real life can be lethal?"

Any of your son's Playmobil sets have a toy car?

"(3) the lodge came furnished with a gun rack with a lock (apparently, it's never too early for four-year-olds to learn the importance of securing deadly weapons. Safety first!)"

Sort of like "buckle your seat belt." Four-year-olds aren't too young to learn that.

It's a lot more effective to gun-proof kids than it is to kid-proof guns, and properly addressed toys can be an important first step in that process.
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Rooster Coburn
Less Gov't + More Responsibility = A Better World
12:19 PM on 11/11/2011
Your money. Your choice. That's the strengh of the free enterprise system.
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Jerry Bourbon
10:57 AM on 11/11/2011
What is the difference between a normal American and a "progressive"?

If a normal American does not want her kids playing with toy guns, she does not let them play with toy guns.

If a "progressive" does not want her kid playing with toy guns, she tries to ban toy guns.
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jeromettaylor
The Aliens were here 1st!
07:19 PM on 11/15/2011
WOW. Excellent!
10:27 AM on 11/11/2011
Kids are going to learn about guns... from somewhere. Either on the street from irresponsible friends... from irresponsible Hollywood... or from responsible adults who love them and want to ensure they are trained in the safe use of firearms. It appears that Devon has chosen options one and two for his children.
10:22 AM on 11/11/2011
Before I was old enough to go to school, I went hunting with my father. I had a gun my dad cut from a board with a nail for a trigger. I had a Roy Rogers two gun holster set that I even took to school. When the weather was bad and we couldn't go outside for recess, the teacher would divide the blackboard in two. One half to the boys and the other half to the girls. The boys were always drawing stick men with machine guns shooting at each other, tanks shooting at each other and airplanes dropping bombs on the stick men. Today we have all these crazy video games and kids don't even go outside anymore. It seems like boys can't even be boys anymore. My dad taught me gun safety and I shot my first gun when I was eight years old.
07:04 AM on 11/11/2011
Wow, I hope you don't let your kid participate in pillow fights because that would be promoting violence. OR.... you could just teach him the difference between a pillow fight and a real fight, and teach him when one is appropriate and not the other. Kind of like explaining the difference between toy guns and real guns.
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OdinsEye
Korean-Latino cop and combat vet
09:49 PM on 11/10/2011
You know that in Europe, many who go to Alpine-style chalets go hunting? I am pretty sure that in the old movie Heidi, Grandfather can be seen carrying a rifle.

"The head of the toy family, who I'll call "Lederhosen Man" had a pair of teeny binoculars, which I assumed he would use to watch the flock of birds perched in the tree house. "

More than likely he is a forstmeister or possibly a jägermeister.
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08:35 PM on 11/10/2011
Let's keep this simple. You don't want your little boy to play with toy guns? Even miniature toy guns? Fine, then don't let him. Just keep your nose out of everyone else's business and don't try to deny them having a bit of fun in a totally safe way. Good grief, if you can't help your four year old to tell the difference between a mini toy gun and a real gun, then you had better make sure your real guns are locked up. You missed an opportunity in my opinion. You could have pointed out the difference and taught him something useful. Eddie Eagle doesn't talk to kids about miniature toy guns either so your attempt to use that fine NRA program to bolster your view point doesn't work...
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hawaiianstile
all hail the balance of nature.
02:55 PM on 11/10/2011
it seems to me this toy company prides themselves on making realistic toys. if lederhosan man wants to eat he needs to hunt, thats reality. while i personally hate guns i dont fault the company for including them, and i would (depending how old the kid is) let him have the toy guns that come with the set, but explain to him the reality of the situation. "these my boy are hunting rifles, while we use a knife and dogs to hunt in the mountains, the people like this use these rifles, and lock them safely away so kids like you cant get hurt by them."

and i would be so pleasantly surprised for my kid if the sea diver set came with a little three prong spear. taking my kid spear diving is one thing i look forward to most in life.
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hawaiianstile
all hail the balance of nature.
02:56 PM on 11/10/2011
it seems to me this toy company prides themselves on making realistic toys. if lederhosan man wants to eat he needs to hunt, thats reality. while i personally hate guns i dont fault the company for including them, and i would (depending how old the kid is) let him have the toy guns that come with the set, but explain to him the reality of the situation. "these my boy are hunting rifles, while we use a knife and dogs to hunt in the mountains, the people like this use these rifles, and lock them safely away so kids like you cant get hurt by them."

and i would be so pleasantly surprised for my kid if the sea diver set came with a little three prong spear. taking my kid spear diving is one thing i look forward to most in life.