"I respect the secrets and magic of nature. That's why it makes me so angry when I see these things that are happening, you know, that every second, I hear, the size of a football field is torn down in the Amazon. I mean, that kind of stuff really bothers me. ... I love the planet. ... I love it. ... People are always saying, 'Oh, they'll take care of it. The government'll... Don't worry, they'll...' 'They' who? It starts with us. It's us, or else it'll never be done."
--Michael Jackson, "This Is It"
Michael Jackson's film "This Is It" astonished me. I had no idea that he was such an environmentalist, or how his creative life was fueled by his passion for Planet Earth. His posthumous film touched a place in me that instigated a call to action. Thus this short piece on how to heed M.J.'s warning: do something before it's too late.
With the advent of vaccines, technology and industrialized ways of living, life span has increased since our grandparents were kids. By 2050, it is estimated that the planet will house more than 9 billion people. Though birth control is available to those who know about it and choose to use it, it is my belief that educating our youth about creating a family must now include the topics of overpopulation, the environment and adoption. It is no longer OK to only discuss safe sex with our hormone-driven, adolescent population. We now must, if our planet is to survive, show our children how poverty, environmental disasters and garbage are a direct result of too many people living on Planet Earth, consuming -- at least in the Western world -- far more than our share of resources.
My 4-year-old, Ethiopian-born daughter lives as a privileged American, with all the perks that come with this. She uses the computer to play "Curious George" and "Mickey Mouse Clubhouse" games. She eats macaroni-and-cheese for dinner, and if she swallows the broccoli on her plate, she is rewarded with an ice cream sandwich for desert -- all organic. Her best friend at preschool, the 4-year-old son of a surgeon and a scientist, got an iPad for his last birthday. His grandmother gave it to him, under the guise that she wanted to be able to Skype with him often. And, as hypocritical as this may make me sound, I thought this was really cool.
This one 4-year-old will eventually trade in his iPad for the next new thing. My daughter will, no doubt, eventually get hers, as well. The old equipment, if not disposed of consciously (and this takes some homework; ask your local Best Buy for help), will end up in a landfill. We are two families among billions who may think about where our used items end up being dumped, but may not always take the time to do the right thing. This thought alone has been enough to kick my rant about choosing adoption first into the highest gear possible.
I'm frightened about our future. And I want every child to be scared, too. Because sometimes fear is the only motivator that clicks the mind over and presents new ideas that may, generations down the road, make a difference.
Included in my book, "Finding Aster: Our Ethiopian Adoption Story" (February 2011, Inkwater Press), are three appendices, one that focuses on the topic of overpopulation. Researching for this section, I came upon a "belief" that is the basis for a movement called the Voluntary Human Extinction Movement, or VHEMT. Rather than viewing human life as something to be destroyed, they actually consider their movement as "the humanitarian alternative to human disasters."
In an article published in the San Francisco Chronicle, Les Knight, the spokesperson for VHEMT, discusses his passion for Planet Earth. Reading the author's thoughts as he interviews Knight, I was struck with how similar Knight's feelings about Earth are to Michael Jackson's. But unlike Jackson, who used music and film to illustrate his point, Knight employs words. And though there is something quite powerful about seeing an image and feeling emotive music to get a message into one's consciousness, there is also strength in reading a clear and direct message. I have found a "like mind" in Knight, and know that this ideology about voluntarily deciding to stop breeding is controversial. However, it can also be a seed-planter.
Several years after this article was published, Knight provided a statement for my book, "Finding Aster." In part, it reads:
Adopting existing children avoids adding another wildlife habitat usurper to the excessive billions of us, provides parenting opportunities for couples who feel qualified, and gives life-saving care to children who would be languishing in miserable conditions. Until we eliminate the inhumane conditions which create orphans, an urgent, unfilled need for compassionate parents continues unabated. Adoption isn't a complete solution, it's simply the best we can do with a deplorable situations.
Though I did not start out on the path of adoption, or writing a book about the experience, to promote adoption as a way to help heal the planet, as Oprah often has said (quoting Maya Angelou), "When you know better, you do better." It is my greatest hope that presenting the idea of choosing adoption as a first choice rather than a last option will plant knowing seeds in fertile minds and encourage people who inhabit this planet to make choices that perhaps they might not have made.
Maybe if a woman deeply feels the desire to give birth, she will do it one time, then decide that adopting to grow her family is the most conscious choice to make. Maybe if a couple finds that they cannot sustain a pregnancy, rather than go find a fertility doctor to prescribe drugs that possibly will make her pregnant, these people will decide that adoption is the better option.
The time has come to see that choosing adoption as a first choice, not a last option, for growing your family is the right thing to do -- for the planet, for a woman's body, and for the parentless children who ache for family.
Stefanie Iris Weiss: My Uterus Is Officially Closed for Business and I Have No Regrets
Please do not assume to know the conditions that surrounded my daughter being given up for adoption. Please do not assume that you know what it is like for many of the Ethiopian children who have been brought to a life where medical care, food, and shelter are not a luxury, if available at all. Please do not assume that I am not teaching my child to respect the planet and teach others to do the same. Please do not assume that my husband and I are not strong earth advocates, or politically for anything but that which best, to the best of our abilities, serves our planet.
Have you been to Ethiopia? Have you been involved in Hague investigations of corruption? How many birth children do you have? Do you produce garbage? Do you vote? Your comment, though perhaps well-intentioned, assumes that I am worldly ignorant and emotionally bankrupt. Until you take the time to read all that I have written on my blog, until you have read my book and personally contacted me at info@findingaster.com to discuss your "issues" with my work, I cannot take you seriously.
No, I don't need to watch a BBC documentary to learn more about the earth's resources, and whether and how they can sustain human life. I have a college degree in environmental science. If you get your education through television specials, you have bigger issues than can be addressed in this conversation.
I make no claims to knowing the circumstances surrounding your child's birth, adoption, living conditions in Ethiopia, etc. My point was to complexify an issue that you are reducing to a frightening level of simplicity. And by the way, I have been to Ethiopia, and I've witnessed grinding poverty, but suggesting that food, medical care and shelter are not available at all is quite a stretch.
I have no children, I produce trash, most of which I recycle, I vote, and i have no intentions of reading your book or contacting you to engage further in this ridiculous conversation. Thanks for the insults; they weren't enlightening.
Exactly.
How does removing an existing child from subsistence conditions and placing him in a resource devouring culture help the environment? Not only will the child grow up in that culture, he will presumably have (or adopt) children of his own and they will have (or adopt) children... This is progress?
Better to reduce the amount of resources you (and your family) are using. If you adopt an existing child, you are (temporarily) reducing the amount of resources needed in the child's modest homeland while doing nothing about the amount of resources being depleted to support yet another First World citizen.
At first glance, adopting rather than breeding your own would appear to impact absolute population numbers - but a much greater impact would result from universal access to birth control.
Agreed. And thank you for pointing this out.
Please remember, also, my main point is to EDUCATE our YOUTH, not dissuade the adult population from growing their families. Education must begin early early early on. From recycling, reusing, growing our own foods, buying locally, passing on, not throwing out, and avoiding products purchased outside of one's community and/or country, to considering not procreating, or adopting existing children to create a family.
However, I fundamentally disagree that adoption is any way to address the issues that face our planet. The problem is not just the number of people, but the people multiplied by how much we all consume. When you (and I) adopted, we did not create new life, but we DID create new little first-world consumers. The rainforest doesn't care whether the iPad is being used by your bio kid or an Ethiopian kid, surely? It just. makes. no. difference.
I also disagree with Knight's statement that adoption "gives life-saving care to children who would be languishing in miserable conditions." The wait for adoption for a healthy infant from Ethiopia is more than a year - from China, more like five. There are many, many more parents waiting for these infants (and toddlers) than there are infants waiting for parents. And those of us who DID adopt infanst don't get to use the stats about US teens in foster care as if they are anything to do with OUR adoptions.
I am NOT anti adoption, or anti international adoption (since that's what I did!) but I think when we do it, we need to be really clear that it saves neither the planet nor a child.
Thank you for your comment.
I agree that we need to be responsible guardians of our incredible planet, but that doesn't address either of my original points!
The second thing is the entitlement and privilege that drips from your words. Adopting a child from a developing country is not what we need to do to change the world. Most of the children in these orphanages have living parents and family who are living in such terrible poverty that they simply cannot feed the children. The money that you spend on your adopted child's mac & cheese and iPad's could help an entire community, more importantly, could help a family stay together. By adopting from developing countries, the West is maintaining the status quo and supporting a corrupt industry that is rife with kidnapping and child trafficking.
Third, you quote Oprah quoting Maya Angelou. Perhaps you should mention that Oprah herself did not adopt a child, she built a school to help many children - this type of charitable act is what we need to encourage.
And to the commenter who said we need to adopt children for no other reason than we really, really want one - no, we really, really don't. It is not meant to be about providing children for people who really want one.
Also if you adopt a newborn baby, there is a good chance the first mother will still want to raise a child and will have another child in later years so in effect, the population isn't necessarily being reduced overall because if she had raised her first child, she might not have felt that same need to have another.
And just as the paradigm of planning a family has to change, so too does our ways of "consuming".
I am concerned though that many Americans (not you) blame climate change solely on overpopulation in the "poorer" countries of the world. I read recent comments on a Huff Po article on the Famine in Somalia and many wrote the starving deserved to die because they were having too many children. Really cruel comments. And thoughtless because much of climate change has been caused by the over-consumptive Western lifestyle. One American child presently consumes as much resources as approximately 12 Brazilian children!
So please, for her sake, don't raise your daughter like a "typical" American. My sister feeds her daughter almost exclusively organic whole foods, diapers her in cloth diapers and then hang dries the diapers, gets her books at the library and really cute clothes and toys at the Goodwill, composts everything, entertains her by taking her for walks around the neighborhood - not perfect but conscientious. Adoption is definitely worthwhile - giving a child a loving home ... but it just isn't fair to the rest of the world (or our children) for American parents to continue over-consumptive (cancerous) patterns. Thanks again.
Adoption doesn't have to be from China or Ethiopia..plenty here as well!
Personally I think we should just ban sex.
I never cared for Michael's music. Some of the J-5 I liked but his solo career did little for me and my tastes. In my opinion his collaborations (sp?) were best (McCartney for example). He only became more eccentric as time went on. I feel for him but didn't care for him.
As far as your philosophy, I found your story moving and your desire adopt such a child as wonderfully fresh. Your intentions are noble. I have no problem with those looking to "reduce or not add" to the planet's population, or at least to slow its growth.
Thank you for your response. Likely, I will not view the film, but I may take a look at your book.
Seriously. I can hardly stand to read the comments here; they are dripping with privilege. I thought we were supposed to be the good guys. What gives you the right to talk about buying children like you are purchasing a pet? They're not your kids. You have no right to them. Get a dog.
hi pot I'm kettle
I appreciate your points, and too am concerned about what our planet and environment. We have a series underway on RH Reality Check that speaks to these issues. You can view the series here: http://www.rhrealitycheck.org/blog/tag/seven-billion-people
However, I have to take issue with two things in your article. You say "Though birth control is available to those who know about it and choose to use it..." Not true. There are 215 million women worldwide who want to limit or space births and have no access to birth control. Women's ability to use contraception also is hindered in many circumstances by gender-based violence and coercion. Part of the problem of lack of access is our own government, which in kowtowing to the US Conference of Catholic Bishops, as well as evangelical fundamentalists, has so politicized family planning that our international support for this critical public health intervention is stagnant.
The second thing that concerned me was your somewhat flippant treatment of consumption. A four year old with an iPad? Seriously? Your daughter will inevitably go the same route? Those are your choices. My kids are 12 and 15 and do not have their own iPads. They share a family computer and are no worse for the situation. This is a big part of our problem; people who not only consume huge amounts but think also somehow equate good parenting with giving their kids far too much.
Best, Jodi Jacobson
I also admire your strength in denying your kids what has become a seemingly "natural" part of growing up. When friends text and they are shocked we don't I feel good about that. I also should feel good about attempting to keep my daughter from owning an iPad until she is old enough to work and pay for one herself. Thanks so much for your insights and wisdom.
Best to you!
Dina