What can I say about Ying Chu's recent Marie Claire piece "The New Trophy Wives: Asian Women" that hasn't already been said?
Our pals Joz at 8 Asians and Latoya Peterson, editor of Racialicious who's guest-blogging at Jezebel for the next two weeks, have both written terrific posts on Chu's story already, pointing out how, in an effort to dispel certain stereotypes, it only further reinforces them. (Click here for Joz's post and here for Latoya's.)
Not to mention the fact that "The New Trophy Wives: Asian Women" is just a hot mess of half-baked, garbled ideas: Asian women of different ages with incredibly diverse backgrounds and experiences are all lumped together as alike fetish objects; Chu quotes Richard Bernstein, author of the recent book The East, the West, and Sex, as an authority on the subject--"author Richard Bernstein found that the Orientalist illusion continues to influence"--even though Bernstein's book has been taken to task in multiple publications (here at Salon and here in the NY Times and here at Slate) for perpetuating that very "Orientalist illusion"; "globalization" is cited as an influencing factor in the fetishization of Asian women, but only some random collection of mumbo-jumbo about the popularity of Mandarin classes, Malcolm Gladwell's theory on why Asian kids are good at math, and China's dominance in world trade is provided to support that argument; oh, and how about the fact that this whole phenomenon is presented as something that's "new"?!
But, for me, the idea put forth in the Marie Claire piece that really chaps my ass is its closing line:
"Asian women dating white men may never really know if it's a fetish thing."Um, excuse me? Really? So Asian women are not only submissive Suzie Wongs and geishas, we're also fucking brain-dead, too?
The complications of sexual politics notwithstanding, fetishists are easy to spot. They come at you with their prayer-bead bracelets and their suspiciously in-depth knowledge of your "culture." They come with transparent dating histories, and many of them are more than happy to offer up that their last eight girlfriends have been Asian and unabashedly expound--based on their dating experience alone--on the fundamental difference between, say, Korean women and Chinese women. Fetishists tend to talk about you like you're only a member of a larger group; e.g. instead of saying, "I really like your shiny hair," they'll say, "I really like Asian girls' hair." And, frankly, they're creepy, like noticeably-remarkably-right-off-the-bat-creepy, like konichiwa-ni hao ma-what are you?-as-an-opening-line creepy, and stalk-you-on-Facebook-where-they-have-381-friends-who-all-happen-to-be-Asian-women-creepy, and follow-you-to-your-car-in-a-parking-garage-after-you've-shared-two-minutes-riding-an-elevator-together-creepy. It's not rocket science, people.
And if we're going to traffic in stereotypes here, did Marie Claire forget that Asians are supposed to be smart, too?
[Marie Claire: The New Trophy Wives: Asian Women]
[8 Asians: Marie Claire article declares: Asian Women are The New Trophy Wives]
[Jezebel: Stereotypes Run Rampant In Marie Claire's Asian Trophy Wives Article]
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This is no news to me. I can't take these coupling seriously, since White have done the most to harm other culture.
A friend of mine, who happens to be Asian American, posted this on Facebook and it spawned even more comments! She loathed being the object of a fetish, and thought it was creepy. I know that this is a form of racism, but I find it a bit petty because some Asian women benefit from it, and even play along with it. Sure this fetish probably attracts some really clueless morons, but I'm sure there are a few nice white guys who have always had a bit of curiosity towards Asian women and culture. Maybe he got it from watching Karate Kid II. Anyways, boy meets girl due to fetish, boy and girl actually fall in love, and they happily live every after. Even if the guy's original intentions were a bit shady, maybe in the end he matures and sees princess from the East for who she is, no? I know TONS of white guys who have married Japanese wives. Why? Why go through all the trouble of going to Japan, learning a very difficult language, and hooking up with an Asian girl? Why not just marry Mary Anne from the back hills? Because some people just like something different is why. Most people may love their iPods, but there are a few renegades who love their Zunes.
What I told my friend was that though a lesser evil doesn't make it right, at least these girls are actually objects of desire, you know? In contrast, Asian American guys have been ridiculed by American white culture, often portrayed as nerdy, unattractive comedy relief, or just mute kung fu heroes. We've been made fun of for our accents, portrayed with buck teeth and squinty eyes, and told we have small penises...over and over and over and over. Asian American guys have suffered quite a lot through this, more so than these Asian ladies who are complaining about this article. But, I ain't complaining, and we are resilient and will get our American Pie damnit! :) Racism does exist, and so long as people use their brains, they will categorize, compare, and differentiate. They will naturally have racist tendencies. What you all don't realize is that racism is natural, and you all do it. A lot of these angry people act like they've never had a racist thought in their head, but you just haven't analyzed your minds carefully enough. It's baked in. And, being Asian American, I know that Asians can be some of the most racist people around. Reflective SAM on singleasianmale(dot)com
And for those of you who forgot, about 8 years back a major magazine ran a cover story which asked the question: Are Asian men the new accessory? SO the Asian Boyz have had and probably on a smaller scale still have their 'fans'.
People who date/marry someone for the fetish, thrill, social standing are 'tards. Somehow I don't think any of the women in the MC article had a gun to their head. If they want to be someone's fetish doll. Hey...last time I checked its a free country.
~ Btw, I'm the offspring of a white guy who fell for an asian woman
Not into little girls thats sick.
I am an Asian woman who has dated white, latino, AND Asian. I have had no happier relationship than my Asian (ex) boyfriend and have realized that the white males have come back time and time again just for sex. I was left confused, but still wanting (due to the human condition of wanting more) but my Asian boyfriend was by far, the sweetest and most upholding, caring, and overall, didn't care to show me off in front of cameras or to friends or family saying "look I have an Asian girlfriend!" or to sex me up for his own twisted pleasures.
Asian males have been downplayed whilste the Asian female has been fantasized. Well I'm SICK of these overplayed fantasies. I further want to extend the question to resound in my Asian female sisters out there, have you really fallen victim to a white guy who has internalized his fetish for Asian poon so much that you NOR HIM has been able to see it? or maybe you are still in DENIAL?? That's what brainwashing is! You can't see it! And have YOU been brainwashed to fantasize about White Males yourselves??? I ask again, has Hollywood brainwashed you to such a degree?
At the peril of being accused of every sin under the sun, I find that the main reasons for the Amer-Asian attraction is that men like young, attractive women. I think there are few women more seductive and attractive than an Asian woman but that is an observation and not a fetish.
As they say in her country, "Old Carabao like tender grass." I sort of know what that means and I make no apology for it. Also, most of these women actually do not have the American age bias against most men over 40. Older, to many of them, means experienced, prosperous and stable. In a country where most people are immaciated, my beer belly signifies that I'm well to do. And in the respect of their culture, I guess I am. I've heard all the criticisms but the bottom line is: Since I went Asian, I can't go back Caucasian"
Sorry about that!
I would also suggest that with the great number of highly educated and ambitious women of Asian ancestry out there that some of them find there way into relationships with high powered white, black, name the ethnicity, men is not a surprise. This is not a victimhood issue. It is just part of Asians further integrating into domains and social circles in the west that were in the past almost exclusively white. No need to make anything insidious out of it.
As a side note, check out this website:
http://www.blacktokyo.com/
While there are also indiviual factors involved, for the most part, these social/racial dynamics I belive are a major driving force.