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Doree Lewak

Entries by Doree Lewak

The Grinch Who Stole April Fool's: A Day of Big Laughs Gets Even Bigger Opposition

(0) Comments | Posted April 1, 2012 | 2:32 PM

Ah, April Fool's Day. A day suggesting, among other things, that it's April 1, and it's not moving anytime soon. That while today there may be showers, they do in fact make way for May flowers. A day solidly planted between the Ides of March and Tax Day, neither of...

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Holy Beauty: Getting Kosher Glam for Passover As Difficult As Splitting the Red Sea

(0) Comments | Posted April 18, 2011 | 3:02 PM

For a normal woman, any rupture to her beauty routine will make her as pleasant as Pharaoh on a bad day. But for the kosher ladies of Passover, overhauling their cosmetics caddy is an undertaking of Biblical proportions.

During Passover, everything that's fermented and leavened is prohibited -- and Jews...

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Health Teachers' Hopes Flaccid Over Extinct Fruit

(0) Comments | Posted January 12, 2011 | 11:00 AM

Slippery problems plague sex ed classes across the country, screwing high school health teachers yet again -- and not in a way they'd hoped for. The first time they got screwed, of course, was when they became high school health teachers.

Their once reliable, go-to fruit,...

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Europe's Latest Page-Turner

(0) Comments | Posted August 31, 2010 | 11:14 AM

There's yet another reason to toast the European literary scene besides the emergence of Larrson Steig. If you're drinking Horace Engdahl's Kool-Aid -- the Swedish literary critic (and self-styled know-it-all) who recently claimed that Europe "still is the center of the literary world" -- then you'll want to check out...

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How a Frenemy Swallows 'Good News' Gracefully

(1) Comments | Posted April 5, 2010 | 2:07 PM

They say April showers bring May flowers. But when it rains, it pours. Three friends just announced their engagements this week in what I was hoping was a belated April Fool's gag. Clearly, these friends who are plotting their futures with guys whose last names have six zeroes at the...

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The White House Passover Seder: Massive Conspiracy Against the Jews

(0) Comments | Posted March 28, 2010 | 1:57 AM

The implicit message ricocheted around the Jewish world. There's shpilkis in my genechtagazoink - and I'm just hoping I can hold out until the health care bill kicks in. Insiders are buzzing that the White House seder has got everything this year - except the Jews.

With an abbreviated...

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Cougars Demand Fair Representation in Olympics

(1) Comments | Posted February 24, 2010 | 4:31 PM

Cougars: they're the hardest-working malcontents in the business. They're all about the games -- and those rings, for that matter -- yet they wonder, when it comes to Olympics representation, where is the love?

For the fastest-growing population in the U.S. -- and the most feared -- Cougars have been...

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Bait a Geek, Beta Style: The New Apple Store Takes a Bite Out of the Upper West Side

(0) Comments | Posted November 13, 2009 | 2:24 PM

The fourth New York City Apple retail store is launching this weekend, this time on the UWS, raising the unavoidable question: has anyone actually gotten laid from the launch of an Apple store?

Well, this weekend I intend to find out.

I haven't been this excited since the Chocolate Show...

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"The Panic Years Push-Up"

(1) Comments | Posted May 14, 2009 | 4:48 PM

If you're a single woman pushing 30 and it's almost pushing wedding season, it can only mean one thing: you're in need of a little pick-me-up.

Luckily, that's where the matrimonial miracle bra comes in: a push-up bra guaranteed to elevate your assets and chances at reaching the...

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Is Green Lit So Green After All?

(2) Comments | Posted April 22, 2009 | 2:30 PM

If you harbored shame reading that Tori Spelling tome before, imagine how guilty you'd feel if you knew about the egregious expenditure of natural resources used to produce it.

With Earth Day upon us, booksellers are putting front and center not-so-subtle reminders to give back to Planet Earth. Although nowadays...

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Lighter Unto the Nations: Can Passover be Healthy?

(0) Comments | Posted April 9, 2009 | 2:17 PM

No beer, no bread, no-brainer? Is Passover indeed healthier?

With most carb derivatives as major Passover culprits, it would seem that the Exodus can do wonders for the waistline. With no choice but to cut out some of the usual suspects that hobble a healthy lifestyle, being a member of...

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Letterman's Cold Feet Finally Thaw

(12) Comments | Posted March 25, 2009 | 3:38 PM

David Letterman stunned the world -- and perhaps stunned his longtime girlfriend even more -- when he tied the knot to Regina Lasko after a 23-year "whirlwind" courtship.

I wish I could say that this gallant gesture should give the rest of us hope that our boyfriends will "eventually come...

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How Not to Live Vi-Carrie-ously Through Cartoon Characters

(2) Comments | Posted June 3, 2008 | 5:28 PM

Are you a Charlotte, Miranda, Samantha, Carrie, or a fool? If you answered the latter, you just might have more self-awareness than most of your female counterparts.

The other day, I did what any self-respecting girl coming off a bad date - in Brooklyn, no less - would do. After...

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The Freedom Frank at Gray's Papaya: Let Freedom Relish!

(2) Comments | Posted May 20, 2008 | 6:49 PM

When you walk into a hot dog joint for their irresistible "Recession special," you don't necessarily expect to be drawn into a debate on liberties, inalienable rights and our basic American freedoms. But that's exactly what happened last week when I walked into this hot dog shop as one person...

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The Swastika: Making a Comeback, or Did It Ever Really Go Away?

(16) Comments | Posted March 4, 2008 | 8:31 PM

Did you hear the one about the book of swastika cartoons? No, seriously. It's springtime for swastikas, c/o Simon & Schuster.

Just in time for Israel's 60th, a book filled with swastika cartoons and illustrations guaranteed to tickle even the most discerning funny bone breathlessly arrives. (Call off the...

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Panic and Politics: Where's the Love?

(0) Comments | Posted February 13, 2008 | 7:56 PM

OK, so if it's Valentine's Day and the candidates are falling over themselves to court us, then really, where is the love?

Is Cupid merely apolitical?

Things are not looking good for the single girl looking to make a love connection at the levers. First, Hillary unceremoniously dumps...

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My Jewish Achilles Whore

(15) Comments | Posted February 8, 2008 | 3:12 PM

Sarah Silverman: Why did that acid-tongued pisher with a guitar pick have to ruin it for the rest of us? Like the Jewish singles crisis in America wasn't bad enough already.

For a week now, all I hear at singles' events are two things: "Those don't quite look like birthing...

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