Sorry, no time for video, but here's...
DOUG'S DOZEN: 12 THINGS MC CHRYSTAL SAID TO OBAMA AT THEIR LAST MEETING
1. SORRY DUDE, I WAS WRECKED ON SOME AWESOME AFGHAN HASH
2. JUST SO I UNDERSTAND, YOU WANT ME TO RESIGN, NOT RE-SIGN?
3. I THINK MY PROBLEM WAS READING ALL THOSE BOOKS ABOUT GENERAL MC CLELLAN
4. DO YOU KNOW WHO YOU'RE TALKING TO? I'M FRIENDS WITH PRESIDENT KARZAI !
5. WHERE ARE YOU GOING TO FIND ANOTHER GENERAL WHO CAN GET ALONG WITH A DRUG-DEALING ELECTION THIEF?
6. THIS SUCKS WORSE THAN THE ENDING OF "SEVEN DAYS IN MAY"
7. I'M REALLY UNCOMFORTABLE SURROUNDED BY ALL YOU CIVILIANS I CAN'T HAVE KILLED
8. I GUESS A LETTER OF RECOMMENDATION TO KIM JONG IL IS OUT OF THE QUESTION
9. I FORGOT, DID I MENTION THE HASH?
10. NO, SIR, YOU HEARD WRONG. I SAID YOU WERE "BIGGER"
11. DO YOU MIND IF I DON'T FINISH OUT THE WEEK? FRIDAY I START MY NEW JOB AT FOX NEWS
12. THANK YOU, MR. PRESIDENT. AND YOU TOO, MR. BITE-ME
c 2010 by Doug Molitor
for more Doug's Dozen (videos on FunnyOrDie) go to: www.dougsdozen.com
(See, that wasn't any fun to read at all, was it?)