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Doug Molitor

Doug Molitor

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Doug's Dozen: 12 Schwarzenegger Catchphrases About His Love-Child

Posted: 05/19/11 08:52 AM ET

Arnold Schwarzenegger has admitted fathering a child out of wedlock with a member of his household staff ten years ago, while married to Maria Shriver... just before he ran to unseat Gov. Gray Davis.

Certainly, this must have been a traumatic experience... finding out he's going to be a father, arranging for the birth, keeping the birth-mother working in his household for the next ten years-plus, not telling his wife, telling his wife, telling us...

Then again, this is a guy who ought to be used to trauma. He's slain just about the entire population of California in his movies - and came close in real life. But no matter how dire or horrifying the situation, Ahnold is never at a loss for a quip. In fact, he's got a memorable catchphrase or two in just about every film.

And as it turns out, he's no different in real life. So here's...

DOUG'S DOZEN: 12 SCHWARZENEGGER CATCHPRASES ABOUT HIS LOVE-CHILD

1. "ARE YOU SURE IT'S NOT A TUMOR?"

2. "YOU HAVE BEEN SPERMINATED."

3. "LOOKS LIKE I PUMPED...YOU UP!"

4. "HASTA LA VISTA, BABY-MAMA"

5. "YOUR LUGGAGE...FOR YOUR TRIP TO THAT HOSPITAL IN MEXICO."

6. "IS IT A BOY...OR A GIRLIE MAN?"

7. "I HAVE JUST BEEN ERASED...FROM THE BIRTH CERTIFICATE."

8. "I'LL BE BACK...IN TEN YEARS."

9. "I KNOW WHY YOU CRY, BUT IT IS SOMETHING I CAN NEVER DO, CONVINCINGLY."

10. "COME WORK WITH ME, IF YOU WANT TO LIVE....A LIE."

11. "THERE WON'T BE A STORY. IF IT LEAKS, WE CAN KILL IT."

12. "REMEMBER WHEN I SAID I WOULD KILL THE STORY? I LIED."

See more lists at www.dougsdozen.com

And Doug's Dozen videos on FunnyOrDie