Ever look at or listen to a "star" and assume he/she had it "easier" than you? Check this out.
If you believe you are too busy, or feel frustrated by the time it takes to view this, imagine what 22 year old Choi Sung-Bong from Korea must have endured, the patience it must have taken, the persistence to believe in life, when all seemed lost. His story is a golden reminder that the story of transformed suffering -- that endeavor to turn what is asleep and leaden in our lives into what is fully alive and golden -- is global and cross-cultural. The instinct to bring forward what is within our hearts is embedded into our very cellular structure, pushing for expression regardless the odds.
Perhaps this is in part what irks us so much when we see the dysfunctional antics of politicians at work. Their power games, their stalling, their refusal to move forward from the dung heap of their thinking, reflects human nature at its very worst. Whenever we are held hostage by those who are sleep-walking is the time to take back the reigns to our own life. A refusal to bend, to compromise and to address what is needed for evolution goes against the very grain of awakening to the gift of life. Whenever life force is squandered we lose hope; we fall victim to despair, anger and resentment. So when someone refuses to roll over and play dead, we do well to pay attention for it reignites the creative fire in our belly to do better.
Choi, a manual worker by day, was abandoned at an orphanage at the age of three. He was beaten by the people who took him in and ran away by five. He slept in public toilets by night and sold sticks of gum in the day for over 10 years. He did not whine, stamp his feet or say "no" to life. He dealt with what was before him. He did not take his conditions personally. This courageous young man is a living example of the potency of belief in sincerity finding its voice. Even for those who mutter to themselves, "I've heard it all before," this story has its particulars that cannot fail to humble those of us who catch ourselves in a bit too much whining, and a bit too little rejoicing for what is before and within us.
Who is the "different person" Sung-Bong finds within himself when he sings? That "other" is nothing less than the self, the soul, finding its way in a world that is generally far too preoccupied to care -- and specifically, a world fascinated by far too many stories of "ain't it awful" tabloid or governmental high dramas. How refreshing it is to be reminded that the gold in life is worth the work it takes to harvest that which is within.
Witnessing such a story is powerful because it challenges us to ask ourselves whether we are settling for a life too small. Is the conversation we are having one that invests in greater possibilities, or greater limitations? Are we allowing ourselves to be side-tracked by the unexpected, and even annoying, challenges that have presented themselves in our lives, or are we remembering to "take five," as the saying goes, and pare down to the essential?
Like Choi Sung-Bong, are you willing to use your circumstances and conditions as a launchpad from which to shine? Not shine for the "glory" of it, or the fame of it (a limited shelf-life at best), but for the sheer desire to give voice to what is within because it is there to give. Perhaps the music he makes resonates with us, in part because it is driven not by obligation, duty or self-aggrandizement, but out of sheer delight. He does not deny his earlier circumstances. Like a rose, he grows from dark compost. His contribution is not in spite of his history, but comes through it. The best of all is that he has, as the old song put it, "only just begun."
Everyone has their story -- their saga of personal suffering. We all know people who insist that they cannot "do better" because of their history, their parents, their family, their DNA or what they ate last night that gave them spiritual indigestion. In fact, if we are completely honest, who cannot recall a time when we did not "milk" our "woe is me" situation longer than necessary just to garner a tad more attention? Or, as Andriette Earl has pointed out so beautifully, perhaps we hesitate so long at the fire because we'd like to have a few more folks notice the "flames licking at our heels" and get more credit?
Consider what story you would write with your life if you were abandoned as a toddler, beaten, ran away, raised yourself for 10 years on the streets, slept on a urine soaked floor and lived alone? There are those, I know, who have these stories. Then there are those of us who grew up in a home, were raised by imperfect parents (to the best of their ability) -- by mothers and/or fathers who tried to give us more than they'd been given. Maybe our lives were not perfect. Maybe our families were "dysfunctional." Maybe we lived in a good neighborhood or a lousy one. Maybe "the deck" we've been handed has more than its share of hard knocks. The thing is, however, what matters is not so much what our history has been, but our interpretation of who we are in relationship to our world today -- by virtue of letting who we are at the core shine forth -- which is something much stronger, more irresistible than the stale old stories we tell ourselves. The issue is not one of "doing," but first, as did Choi, listening. Noticing what affects us deeply and then committing to that unique something within, even when, like him, we do not believe we are very good at what makes us happy.
Related or not, by blood or nationality, when we hear Choi sing our own heart strings are pulled in a remarkable way. In that moment he is our son, our brother or sister, our mother or father, our grandmother or grandfather. He demonstrates what it is to break through perceived limitations, and step out and up. As the hero in Amistead said long ago: "I am my ancestors' dream." Amen to that. Heroes and heroines peel back the layers of disappointments and fears, and break through their own traditional story of misery -- shining through the darkness. This is nothing less than miraculous.
You might be asking yourself what makes it possible for one person to step out of the shadows like this -- and lift our spirit through the humble offering of their gift, like this young man -- versus one who shrinks back, plays small and makes excuses? Very simply: It is the nature of the conversation we are having with ourselves. The good news is that it's never too late to shift the way we converse when we are talking with ourselves!
Choi reminds us of the power of courage -- yes courage -- which comes when giving comes not out of obligation, but from joy. Gilbran puts it this way in "The Prophet" "On Giving":
"And there are those who give and know not pain in giving...
They give as in yonder valley the myrtle breathes its fragrance into space.
Through the hands of such as these, God speaks, and from behind their eyes He smiles upon the earth."
Your turn: Who inspires you most? Whether you know the person or not, it doesn't matter. What inspires you? I'm listening and learning from you, my teachers. Wishing you every blessing. I will be back in September after holiday, and beginning a new chapter in my own life. You are in my heart. Cara
His is the dream of his people's people. So are we.
For more, see carabarker.net. For updates, contact me at carabarker.net, or dr.carabarker@gmail. To receive email notices when I post new blogs on HuffPost, click "Become a Fan" at the top of this page. Stay tuned for upcoming developments with The Love Project, including "Practicing Love." Follow me on Twitter at www.twitter.com/DrCaraBarker.
Follow Dr. Cara Barker on Twitter: www.twitter.com/DrCaraBarker
thanks Cara for bringing it to us, I would have missed seeing it
Little Princess Having a new friend in our land,
To her, we extend our hand.
My family, is waiting, to see you there
To place a flower, in your hair.
Your house, number one, in the row,
Surrounded by lots of mistletoe.
Decorated with candy kisses,
For a special little misses.
You'll meet Snow White, Tinker Bell too,
They'll come out, and play,with you.
You can join our fairy clan
Play in our family band.
Dance around our fairy ring,
Enjoy yourself, laugh and sing.
Yarrow, will help you too,
Make sure your dreams come true.
So welcome to our fairy land,
Little Princess, from far away land.
My love is with you. Should the posting be on schedule, I will be back this Wednesday. (At least, I sent it in this morning.... Fingers crossed)
xxxooo
Cara
See you then on Wednesday !!
Much love in your way and hugs.....Gypsy
I added his video to my daily motivation library which includes Paul Potts, Susan Boyle, Nick Vuijic, Liu Wei, Hoyt Family.... Together, they have inspired millions!!
One observation: the fact that you respond in such a deep way to people like this cannot be an accident. No doubt you are a man of much more courage than you believe. For one, you showed up here, in such a genuine way. To do so takes strength of character, and a willingness for authenticity. Consequently, I am delighted to be one of your most recent fans.
Do come back. You enrich our conversation.
Peace and blessings,
Cara
P.S. Where are you writing from, if you don't mind saying? There is a familiarity about you.
I'm writing from Singapore, a tiny country in South East Asia. I have just signed up for my first marathon which is inspired by Dick & Rick Hoyt... One of my dream is to run along with my heroes, so I'm preparing myself now....
Thank you Dr. Barker. I look forward to the 20th.
You know why I have you faved and fanned? very simply, you have a way of speaking to and landing in my heart.
I am so grateful for you in my world. Many thanks for shining as you do, dutchdragonfly,
Cara
I should be back here this Wednesday if the staff posts what I sent today.
And I am equally happy to reciprocate.
I'm so grateful to have found this site, and look forward to reading your posts on Wednesdays. Although I'm relatively new to your blog, I've found myself eagerly anticipating whatever new inspiration you'll bring.
Thank you
Welcome back from what was hopefully more "respite from the respite". :)
DD
The fascinating question for me is, how many more Choi Sung-Bong's exist around us that have yet to be noticed?
Miles "Celebrating What It Is To Be In The Family Of Man" Long
Thank you for the tip...
Miles "More New And Friendly Faces Are Always Welcome" Long
What a celebrant you are, and what an honor it is to be one of your new fans.
BTW, you may just find the next HP piece this week interesting. Come on by.
Meanwhile, so many blessings your way,
Cara
I would offer this however, there are many little monkey minds that have and will continue to transcend the ordinary, offering and bringing insights that can elevate us all if we're only open to it... {smile}
Miles "Welcome Back, You Were Missed" Long
I don't quite feel up to retyping my scrubbed comments though perhaps they will magically reappear.
Time for a refreshing walk in the these northwest woods with my dog to clear my head.
Enjoy your much deserved vacation Cara Barker and thanks for the kind invite to be a member of this elite group.
Perhaps we were walking in the same woods? We just returned from the Rainforest in the PNW Olympic area. Spendid air to clear the head of any baggage. Splendid green to refresh the lungs and Spirit. Splendid earth on which to 'come home' to what matters most. How grateful I am for people like you sharing the path.
For your wishes, and your heart, I am most grateful, Z trufflesniffer. I must say that the break was just what I needed, although the real 'down time' was five days. This seems to be a time of ever-growing needs by so many.
Let us remember the refreshment, the woods, the Lesson of the Dog, (best-friendness), and that so much more is possible for those who dare!
All good things your way,
Cara
You are, for the record, such a Light, as well!
Cara
I usually talk to myself in a journal though I do plenty of verbalizing during each day which I usually find effective in clearing up struggles I have with myself though I can be very good at berating myself in self-effacing dialogue. Then I know it's time for a walk with my dog in the woods here in the Northwest where one is so close to nature and the air is clean.
Suffering is multi-faceted isn't it? What some people find is suffering is minor compared to what some people suffer in this world. When I think of suffering and courage I think of cancer patients, Nelson Mandella and the people that were in concentration camps and I NEED to be reminded of them when I get into one of my feel sorry for myself states.
Much to ponder this day.
Thanks for inviting me back here with your lovely people Cara and making me feel welcome.
I relate. You are such a joy to my heart, as are are 'family members' here. If you read through the comments, it is awe-inspiring to meet so many who share a kindred Spirit. THis alone will change the world, in my book.
I understand the journaling as I've kept one for over 40 years, since my Army nursing days with Viet Nam. The beauty is this 'shared journaling' that is happening quite organically here. Little did I imagine when I began here, now starting my 4th year, that this would happen. Oh, how grateful I am.
As for courage, and gratitude to get out of the pity party, oh, my dear, we all need a boost from it at times.
Hugs your way,
Cara
Like gypsy, you are a person who has inspired me with what you write. Others who follow you have inspired me with their posts. Stories about people like Choi Sung-Bong inspire me. But at the same time I feel a bit of shame. It's relative I know. But my circumstances weren't nearly as bad as his. Yet I've had a lot of anger and a chip on my shoulder over the hand I was dealt and how I've played it.
I've had to allow myself to feel the anger, then grieve about my past and let go of wishing it had been different. Difficult steps, but now I'm able to let go of blaming others and myself and be responsible for my own life and happiness.
I've learned the hard way to stop believing things couldn't get any worse. They most certainly can. Now I ask "How can I make this better?" "What could I learn?" asking these questions helps me take positive action.
I wish I had learned this earlier in life. Better late than never, and hopefully I'm teaching my daughter how to be more resilient than I was when younger.
Also every day people, common people , my 87 year progressive and proud for her existance galpal from the Music City. What do I tell her today ? Is she still alive ? last time I spoke with her to share some music some inner thoughts, she showed her concern if her next social security will arive on time for her sustenane. What do I tell her that our elected officials have failed her, and that she knows ? She is well read and follows every single details of the current situation and the pickle we are all in. What am I to do when I know, I may not offer any help, that will end our relationship and friendship....when just being there for her would not suffice...
I think I just said enough...cheers for your return with my cuppa tea...much Love....Gypsy
Apologies for the delay… this took a while for me to wrap my head around the way this wonderful story affected me.. Most of us (with the exception of some politicians) pull for the “underdog,†but what of those who are not so displayed, those mired in the morass of poverty and ignorance, with little luck, little help, and scant examples from which to select? They are to often left with the cruel limits of reality?
But, back to Choi Sung-Bong: I watched a recording of his amazing performance and a couple of the judges’ comments were telling: “Regardless of his hard life, he passionately runs toward what he really wants,†and one in particular, “I think you do have a good instrument in you.â€
What a combination: living as though circumstance is not him, but only where he came from, and though that may contribute to the design of who he becomes, it is only a reference point with little to do with the potentials he may realize. The rough roads of his beginnings remind me of another K. Gibran insight. “Out of suffering have emerged the strongest souls; the most massive characters are seared with scars."
( Continued in reply…)
Then there is that â€Good Instrumentâ€: Each of us possesses at least one, you might even argue that we are all, in toto, good instruments, but, that realization must be paired with dedication and commitment beyond the passion felt, in order to harvest any of that gold.
This gives me hope, a word I sparsely use, because hope is hollow without the working of a plan. But, to see one of such meager and challenging beginnings find purpose and function wrapped in passion and joy so evident, serves as a truss for my hope that there is opportunity for others to do the same, and bolsters my motivation to become a catalyst for that change.
What inspires me are those who do not settle for a small portion of their potential, who are aware of each moment’s possibility, not just for gain, but for acceptance and appreciation of the potentials of their instrument through the development of their budding knowledge and nascent confidence that they can indeed “do It.†The acquiescence to the inevitable pull to be greater over lesser defines the significance of self.
“Noticing what affects us deeply and then committing to that unique something within.†There it is; finding the courage to pursue your passion in your thrid through life… regardless of the obstacles.
Appreciatively loving… and will be missing you,
Kamsa Hamnae Da
Lawson
I appreciate your introduction to Choi. It was certainly time well spent visiting. That interlude was very touching, but I was most moved by the close when he walked down that empty hallway.
I like to write. I am hard pressed to consider myself good at it or bad at it. I never studied the craft enough to be able to tell. I like some of the thoughts that come out of my head, even if it takes me a while to understand them.
Here's a teeny tinny ditty that showed up the other day,
A Firm Formation of Positive Thought is a Prerequisite of Continued Evolution
The universe vibrates and creates images in the heads of humans. We all see the same images, but, nonetheless, languages created different sounds for them.
Furthermore societies instill filters of varying degrees, densities and permeability. If we want to re-establish a relationship with the universal language, we must choose to pursue that action affirmatively.
Thinking is, or should be, a voluntary behavior – a behavior, which we rightfully need to encompass within our personal dominion.
We are each imbued with a responsibility to each other.
There is really only one of us here.
If we are to steer this fellowship progressively towards our highest goal, there must be a concerted effort to animate amelioration.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9LNUxIILOAE
Whatever........!
:) DD.
They were both found homeless in a neighbors garage. I knew Cali was showing her age because she let me touch her; so I built her a gazebo so she could sit outdoors: the place she loved.
She was real cat until the end; she killed my favorate chipmonk just couple months before nature took her.
You write truth: "Everyone has their story -- their saga of personal suffering." I think to some of us it is important for them to ensure all others understand just what they've been through. Even those who've had the storybook childhood have a need to complain about whatever injustices they've endured however grand or slight. At least from what I've seen, in our culture, conversing is tantamount to complaining, this was driven home to me a couple of years ago when I tried to completely avoid complaining or criticizing for three weeks. And complaining gives us an excuse to forgo any effort or risk of failure, so we keep dreaming our dreams until we're gone and never discover if we could have lived the dream.
My internal dialogue would have me believe terrible things. It starts off by telling me that I don't deserve the good stuff in life or that I can't do something because I'm just not capable. If I didn't talk back or consciously take the reins of this two-sided, one brained conversation, I'd be building regrets instead of positive feelings and memories. As the junior Senator from Minnesota used to say in one of his fictive roles, "I'm good enough, I'm smart enough and by golly, people like me." Positive reminders to ourselves are magical and powerful messages.
All my love,
little brother
For me, your statement: "The instinct to bring forward what is within our hearts is embedded into our very cellular structure, pushing for expression regardless the odds" says it all. Not only is it embedded in our cellular structure, we can through a 'leaning into mystery', emerge and name the very elements of this structure. They are there, waiting patiently for us to explore so that they can reveal themselves to us. They are there in the essential design of who we each are and they hold the authentic contribution that is ours to make.
So many inspire me - most recently, I was breathless at the reading of the Nature of Order by architect and scholar, Christopher Alexander ... a beautiful approach to raising consciousness in our world through all that we build. Most inspiring to me are everyday human beings who give themselves over to exploration and discovery of their elemental self - the self that lives and breaths behind the forms of daily life....the self that is at the source of these very forms and expressions!