Isn't it great when you're just cruising along in life, the wind is at your back, all the lights are green and all systems are "Go?" In times like this, it feels as though you've tapped into some kind of magical force, as every choice you make, every action you take manifests at a level even beyond your own expectations.
Life seems effortless, like you've finally learned the steps to the great cosmic dance of the universe. No more doubt and hesitation, no more confusion and uncertainty, just clear skies and smooth sailing ahead. Your relationships feel full and nourishing, creative ideas flow, work is satisfying, opportunities abound. Your cup is filled to the brim and overflowing. Life doesn't get any better.
In times like these, you might even start feeling a bit cocky and take one hand off the wheel, ease up on the gas, put the top down and let the wind blow through your hair. You might even put your life on cruise control, knowing that you're in the "groove" and your momentum will carry you to wherever you're going.
Life seems almost too good to be true. Maybe that thought even crosses your mind. As in, "Wow, I wonder how long this can possibly last?" But you dismiss that thought as life's goodness just keeps coming and you're enjoying the ride.
And then, so imperceptibly that you hardly even notice, some subtle shifts occur. That new client you thought you'd landed becomes hesitant, the payment you were expecting is delayed, your significant other starts getting cranky, those creative juices start to dry up and new opportunities seem a bit out of reach.
You hardly notice, that while the wind was blowing through your hair and you were on cruise control kicking back enjoying the ride, your life went into neutral and your forward momentum began to slow. Even as you lose momentum, you have a set of good stories and excuses to entertain and distract your mind and for awhile, you don't even notice the change. From where you're looking, everything still seems to be moving in the right direction.
You failed to see that you'd taken your foot off the gas. You got so distracted by the beautiful scenery you forgot to be present, in the moment, aware of the "dance" and how to move in it. Perhaps you became so seduced by the trance of comfort and ease you stopped paying attention to the subtle guidance that got you out on the dance floor in the first place, rivaling Fred Astaire or Ginger Rodgers with your stellar moves.
Ever so gradually, those green lights turn yellow, your momentum slows down, and one day, the yellow lights turn red and you come to a dead stop. You find yourself deposited at the doorstep of what seems like a vast desert.
You might not even notice your arrival here at first. The mind, in its infinite capacity to escape reality, still holds on to the fantasy that everything is still working, all systems are still go. Perhaps your body is the canary in the coalmine that eventually lets you know all is not well. Insomnia, digestion or elimination problems might be the first clues that something is off.
You become aware that you feel empty and dry. Your veil of denial is rudely ripped away. Your attention is finally engaged and you realize that one more time, you've fallen asleep, a humbling awareness.
Welcome to the spiritual desert, this vast interior terrain that at first glance, appears to be foreboding territory. This isn't the first time you've found yourself here. You're familiar with this place. The last time you visited, you probably resisted being here. After all, on the surface, it doesn't exactly look like the most exciting place to be.
No welcome mat is spread. No juice bars in sight. No cool, shady places to stop and rest. And furthermore, it looks like you're out here in the wilderness alone and completely unprepared for the journey. You have no rain gear, no camping equipment, nothing to sit on or keep you warm. You left your GPS behind, and there are no familiar landmarks. Where's a Starbuck's when you need one?
You look for something, anything, to give you a sense of direction, but there are no signposts. The sun has set, the sky is dark, devoid of stars. You might as well be on the moon and wonder if perhaps you are. No doubt about it. You are seriously off track.
I think you get the picture. Let me be the first to admit that I've traveled this road many, many times in my 68 years on the planet. Each time I finally come to my senses and realize where I am, and manage to do the work that is being required of me to cross the desert and find my way back to the main road, I vow this time will be the last.
But such a vow is a foolish denial of the human journey and the spiritual work we're all required to do. Even Christ spent time in the wilderness. Who am I, who is any of us to believe we could avoid a similar fate? If we are here to evolve, if we are here to deepen and expand our idea of who we are, if we are here to contribute to the transformation of our collective human experience, we must be willing to do the work that is required of us.
Namely, we must be willing to shed the old skins and let go of our limiting beliefs about who we are and why we're here. To do that, life requires that we periodically "take ourselves to the wood shed" and do some remedial work.
When the ego gets a bit too big for its britches and we loose our humility, life has a way of serving up just the right remedy. Not like punishment. Not like we're bad or wrong. Just off track. And if you've committed yourself to being a servant of truth, the truth will ultimately set you free. You just need to be willing to undo the chains that bind you to whatever false notion of truth brought you to the desert to get your attention.
Which brings me to the soul. As I've written in previous posts about soul process and the soul's agenda, the soul will ultimately have its way with us. The great scholar and psychiatrist, Dr. James Hillman, has written extensively about the soul and its "code, " a kind of imprint, it must fulfill. According the Hillman, the soul has no preference as to how we unfold its agenda, only that we do. We might strike out on a certain path and travel it for eons and if we loose our way, we'll eventually end up in the desert, one of the soul's favorite places for doing its fine-tuning.
The soul feels right at home in the desert. Its nature is descent. Soul work is best done in the deep, quiet, dark places within, far from the noise and distraction of daily life. So if you find yourself in the desert, here are some things to remember:
1) Know you are in an important soul process. Trust it. The soul doesn't mess around. You will be allowed to return to the main road when you've done your work. So get busy.
2) Surrender. You might as well. Resisting will only prolong your stay. Stop resisting and give yourself permission to be right where you are. You're here, aren't you? If you were supposed to be elsewhere, you would be. Accept your fate and invite your ego to join you.
3) Get still. Become silent and listen. Set aside all your agenda, let go of your strategies and game plans and open yourself to receive guidance from a higher source. Don't force it. In the silence will come the guidance you need.
4) Pay attention to your dreams. Dreams are the language of the soul. Put pen and paper next to your bed and before turning out the light, ask for a dream that will help you know what to do next. Be sure to record your dreams upon awakening. Look at your dream as a story in which you are all the characters. What do the various parts of the dream suggest to you about your journey?
5) Keep a journal. Record your process. Give your subconscious mind a chance to download its content and step back. This is a goldmine of information to explore. You'll find clues for how to make your way through the darkness.
6) Look for the edges where growth is possible. Making even one small change in the system changes the entire system. What one, small change can you make?
7) Do it. Take action in the direction of your higher wisdom and guidance. This one action will itself cause another shift in the system. Keep taking new actions, even if you can't see the outcome yet.
8) Trust the process. Suddenly you'll realize you're wide awake! That's the point! Now you can begin to see a path through the desert and beyond. You might see many paths leading to new territories beyond.
9) Choose one and begin the next part of your journey.
10) Enjoy the ride! But remember, going on cruise control can lull you back to sleep pretty quickly, so maybe you should consider keeping your hands on the wheel and foot on the gas and put your life on "Conscious Steering" instead.
Finally, don't be surprised if you find yourself back in the desert sometime in the future. Get over it! Desert happens! Don't waste time fretting about being there. It's part of the process. The sooner you accept your fate, the sooner you can begin to evolve yourself beyond.
I don't mean to suggest that navigating the desert is as simple as 1-2-3. It can take years to make one trip to and through. In my lifetime, I've spent as many as nine consecutive years in my own spiritual desert. Looking back on that period of my life, I now see it as having been an absolutely necessary part of my process. Without the learning that came out of the experience, I would not be the person I am today. It was extremely painful, but the pain I experienced taught me much about my own humanity. It taught me to accept my vulnerability, it taught me compassion and humility. It taught me my own value and worthiness. It taught me about love. I look back on that time as the time when I became an adult.
The soul will surely have its way with us. When it takes you to the desert, sit up straight and pay attention. The teacher has arrived and class is about to begin. And take notes.
I welcome your thoughts and comments about your own experiences in the spiritual desert of your life, what you learned and how you made it through. Please leave your comments here or on my personal blog and website Rx For The Soul.
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Blessings on the path.
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Dr. Judith Rich: Are You Progressing or Staying Stuck?
Honest, raw and on target blog once again. I find you have a gift of sharing your process in a way that is collective, inclusive and compassionate at the same time. A gift!
Being in the spiritual desert is a place many are in. It is difficult not only to be in one, but to be with someone you love who is there too. Time does not seem to exist, and there are no shortcuts to get out.
Sending my love to you............and a water bottle. Gotta stay hydrated wandering the sands. It is fodder for some of your best work for sure. Love, K
You have always been a source of "water" for me! And I recall a few times, long ago, when I carried water for you. This is the gift of deep friendship-- that we carry water for one another and are there when needed.
I agree that it can be as difficult to be with another who's going through the desert as it is to be there yourself. It's a helpless feeling, because the tendency is to want to "fix" whatever isn't working. A fallacy, we know, as only the one who is in the experience can find the way out.
Perhaps I should have called my post: Postcards From The Desert! Thanks for meeting me here.
Much love,
Judith
My dreams always lay the groundwork of course and give me the insight I need. Going within simply traces the path and connects all the unseen dots for me. It's so easy to lie to one's self and I've been doing it for 5 weeks and kicking myself on why I'm not achieving my goal.
It's fascinating to observe how making the decision to be my authentic self this morning which I hadn't realised I'd stopped being changes one's energy and demeanor and puts everything in perspective!
Would love to say more but that'd be a boring book and I gotta dash. This post is exactly what I needed today, my day of that small change.
Love ya
Catherine
It's great to see you here again! I've wondered about you, actually.
It's amazing to eventually find the perspective we've lost and when we do, to wonder how we got so lost. You seem to be headed back towards the main road. What have you learned during this time in the desert?
Keeping taking those small steps and let us know how it's going.
Many blessings to you,
Judith
What have I learned during my time in the desert? That I love myself so much it chokes me up and brings tears to my eyes every single time. That's certainly a wallop to the curmudgeon in me but I accept it all gratefully, really - so very gratefully.
If I hadn't lived through what I did in my tender years I know I would not have been able to make this trek! And cutting off all the rotten bits and just being my little ole self is so very liberating that it feels intimidating at times, just to realise that... well, this is my persona and I'm am bloody fabulous exactly as I am.
Cheers
Catherine
we need to sit down and have a long talk.
but golly gee I made it!
:-))
Your journey from the Bronx to India would make a good book. No doubt, many interesting deserts and mountain tops along the way. Consider me a reader! And as for the long talk, count me in for that too.
We're all blessed that you made it, dear friend. Happy to see you hear,
Judith
Yes and one thousand times Yes! I do recognize the signs well. Well, most of them.
This for me is definitely a time of school being in session. Awake in the night. Doing dialogues with my Inner Counsellor. Surrender and acceptance are really good. And I do see some lights on the horizon, but have a little more inner work to be doing yet. All in good timing.
The good thing about desert times is I get to practice a lot of the processes I share with others. I get to hear for myself the words I might offer to someone else in a similar situation.
Truly all is well and things go a little crazy for a while.
So good to read your post this week - thank you, and for all your good wishes. The messages on FB for my BD have been fabulous and very surprising.
Huge love as ever,
Anne
I've had the sense that you were going through a bit of desert time. I think I might have caught a glimpse of you out there as I rounded a cactus! :-)
Birthdays are a great time for reflection and completion. As you celebrate yours, know how loved and appreciated you are. You are a light for many, including me.
Birthday love and blessings,
Judith
Took a break from a project to read your post. Your points are as usual well made and inspiring, and I particularly appreciated the your comment about being "willing to shed the old skins and let go of our limiting beliefs about who we are and why we're here." It reminded me of one of my favorite Twain quotes that says what we don't know harms us less than what we are sure of, which is wrong.
Those who become lost in the "desert" without a map or so much as a clue about the way out, are often suffering from this illusion of rightness, and they are sure of it... of course what is worse, they don't read your posts. Well, actually, what is worse is that they perpetuate not just their limiting beliefs and thoughts, but often teach them to others... like their kids.
Also, you've started me thinking about the economic desert in which so many are lost and baking. They are in need of support and direction because your last two "things to remember" are so important for so many, and so often missing. The biggest limitation is self limitation in the form of "settling for".
I believe what you most often get is not what you need, want, or deserve... it is that for which you settle. But here I am, starting to ramble on, so I will just say thanks for a fine post again.
Lawson Meadows
About the self-limitation in the sense of 'what we are sure of': I think it's more subtle, at least when the thing we are sure of is merely a hunch, an intuition, a gut feeling. Because in that case, it may very well be true while all the world claims the opposite and while it may seem that we cannot hold on to it other than accepting enormous cost it could STILL be true. That's what makes the shedding of skins so agonizingly painful. That we need to first figure out which part is REALLY dead and not sustainable. And once we start to get a grip on the matter, it sets off a chain reaction (as in 6-9) - which is terribly ambiguous because it SIMULTANEOUSLY contains the keys to our newly gained freedom AND the seed for the next self-imprisonment.
But that's just how it is. It's life. And hence it's good.
But that's just how it is. It's life, and hence it's good! :-)
Wise words! The trick is focusing on the process. Whether hunch or truth from experience, the ever-changing journey requires sloughing off the patina of certainty, albeit painful, in order to gain our bearings in the desert, the woods, or just sitting on the couch hacking away at time. Leaving room to be wrong does not mean you are, but if you are, refusing to question, is an affirmation of an arrogance born from ignorance.
Those who “settle for” accept less when there's more; demand less of themselves when much more is possible; erect roadblocks of convenience rather than continuing the trip; accept as truth, the opinions of others without testing them. When you settle for your circumstance, you circumstance defines you, but when you don’t settle, your circumstance is just where you will come from.
As opposed to your namesakes comment about having the most when content with the least - which I’m sure was aimed at stuff rather than growth - my point is that “settling for” is often tantamount to giving in or giving up, and as Judith says below, that can be the first step on a slippery slope.
Entering any desert - spiritual, emotional, intellectual, or even Jackandcoke's Arizona retreat - gives opportunity to examine and learn, heal and grow, and begin the return trip home. I would gladly settle for that process; that for which I refuse to settle, whether through ignorance or design, is to be lost.
With much appreciation!
Lawson Meadows
Hi my friend,
Great point! Circumstance accepted is circumstance repeated. If you settle for hitting your thumb while swinging a hammer, you better get used to the pain.
Settling from desperation, as so many have done in these economic times, in the common vernacular, sucks!
The hope is that because desperation indicates great need, that great need motivates creativity... if you don't settle... and creativity creates movement. I realize that is a bit simplistic, but it beats just sitting.
Lawson Meadows
When I was 8 years old, my family moved to Saudi Arabia and we lived there until I was 12. During that time, we never left the desert, and the Saudi Arabian desert is the driest, most desolate desert I ever saw. When we left, we flew from Daharan to Geneva in the late spring, and I remember flying over the Alps and across those green meadows, over that incredible pure blue lake and landing there, and feeling like I was reborn. If heaven looks anything like Geneva after 4 years of desert, then I'm really looking forward to it.
But I look back at those days in the desert with real fondness. My family and I shared so many experiences and found such peace and quiet in that place that those were some of the best years of my life. It was difficult - outrageously hot, indescribably dry, sand storms almost every day, and lots of inconveniences. But we met wonderful, peaceful, hospitable Muslims; saw beautiful artwork; went camping together on the Persian Gulf; and generally surrounded ourselves with a community of fellow pilgrims. My life is infinitely better for the desert experience.
When life pauses and you see desert all around, maybe that's a good place to be.
What a gift, your time in Saudi Arabia and your experience of the desert. Thank you so much for lending that perspective. Yes, let's redefine what it means to be at this place. One can ultimately discover their inner oasis and be restored.
Peace and blessings to you,
Judith
Great post. Actually, I've not only 'taken my foot off the gas,' I've taken myself out of the car! This time of 'learning to walk again,' (hmm, I smell another blog coming on) is really a desert experience. Not unlike the one I had quite literally and symbolically when we moved some years back to Arizona. It was culture shock inside and out. It was challenging, and more than challenging. The net was that in my '40 days in the desert,' (read that three years), my life and way of relating to it, took a radical turn. Beauty was redefined. Today's desert is more metaphorical as I stare at the forest beyond my window, while benched until I am able to ambulate again, healing this foot. Once again, there is the resistence, and yet................... the growing appreciatioon that a Greater Good is on it's way, and already here to the degree I can 'water' what's grown dry.
Love and blessings to you and all,
Cara, your next door neighbor up the road here on HP!
Given your foot condition, what an apt metaphor! Tell us, please, how are you "watering" that which has grown dry? This is the 64 thousand dollar question. ( Perhaps in today's economy, we could translate that into millions.....)
Ambling down the block to your post today to see what clues you provide.
Love and blessings to you and knowing on your behalf that healing is happening and greater mobility is already here.
Judith
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KngiJUNdsu0
Riding out tonight to case the promised land
Oh-oh thunder road, oh thunder road oh thunder road
Lying out there like a killer in the sun
Hey I know it's late we can make it if we run
Oh thunder road, sit tight take hold
May the "road" rise up to meet you and as always, know that I am glad to greet you here.
Blessings,
Judith
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/peter-birkenhead/meet-the-old-boss-springs_b_751744.html
Well, that was half of it. The other half is because, in Peter Birkenhead's words, 'the never-ending now' of a 3 minute song is immortalized by 'Thunder Road'.
I'm pretty sure that this fact made Springsteen himself realize that he had set loose something far larger than himself.
I think that the circle of 6-9 on your list - with a few da capos in between - is the sort of thing that promises a never-ending now as a result. If those desert impressions from the bottom of the gut can be captured at all, that is.
Funny you mention the desert. I happen to have the most remarkable relationship with what is the Sonoran Desert here in AZ. It’s where I take my troubles and leave them. I walk it daily like I did last night through the rain, hail, puddles and mud. And I walk it mid-day in summer, no matter the heat.
My connection to the desert has to do with being still with life as it is, adverse conditions abound. I have surrendered to my current employment struggle. And I have accepted these uncomfortable circumstances just as the desert has accepted drought and desolation. Am I the desert or the desert me?
The walk last night was confirmation of seasonal change. Another dry season has ended. The smell of damp air is now much different than summer. Through the deserts summer stillness the nourishment of rain has come. Perhaps my seasonal change and the nourishment of employment are not far behind.
Thanks, and I'm glad to be back.
Am returning from my own spell in the metaphorical desert, thus, this topic called to me as a vehicle to find my way back into the writing mode. With writing, as you know, it's use it or lose it. A spell away, and I find myself having fallen "off the horse", lacking inspiration and a even a way to access it. Then, my inner counselor said, "just write from where you are". Duh! What else is there?
What a glorious metaphor, walking in the desert on a daily basis! It has never been "my place" and yet I know it holds great gifts. Thank you for sharing your process. The blessings you seek are already on their way.
Sending you love and prayers,
Judith
This is my second reply to your comment. The first one went off into the great, cosmic, cyber desert.
I just want to say to you, yet again, what a gift you are! We are all enriched by your sharing, your honesty, your courage to be nothing other than what you are. Your seven years in the desert have certainly served in shaping you to become the masterpiece human being that you are.
I always appreciate what you bring to the table.
Abundant blessings to you,
Judith
A brilliant post, and another amazing coincidence, as my post from last night is on the exact same topic! Our minds are obviously connecting in a meaningful way at some level. I love it!
I, too, had a nine year desert experience from which I learned the same lessons. I think of it now as my soul's gestational period: nine months for a baby, nine years for a soul. One of the most practical lessons for me in terms of maintaining a healthy perspective during the bad times was to stay conscious; i.e. to notice my discomfort, find a healthy way to bring it out into the open instead of pushing it under the rug, and tolerate the tension of it for as long as it takes for the solution to appear. And one of the most gratifying benefits of not just surviving, but thriving after one leaves the dessert is the rock-bottom trust I now have that in the same way that spring always follows winter, hope and refreshing water are just around the bend if I will just keep walking.
With much admiration and gratitude for your wisdom,
Jeanie
http://www.jeanraffa.wordpress.com
Thanks so much for taking the time to share your comment. Having visited your website and read your post today, as I commented there, the great One Mind is using us all to forward the upward spiral of the collective, so no surprise that we should be on the same wavelength in our writing.
To my fellow pilgrim on the path, I wish you many blessings and continued inspiration to keep doing what you're doing.
Love
Judith
No need to pathologize nor get anxious about it.
Good to see you here again!
And good advice for the fragile ego: "No need to pathologize nor get anxious about it." Would that we could remember that when we're "in the trenches" without a map and no perspective. How good to know that there are conscious beings around to serve as reminders.
Blessings your way,
Judith
I hesitate to use the term "wasteland", for to me, it implies a space devoid of possibility. I don't see it quite that way. I see the desert as a natural part of our human journey, one that we're required to check into from time to time, in order to shed the trappings from the "illusion" you cite and realign ourselves with the truth.
It surely does feel like "slogging", though, but even that could be reframed and considered to be merely a different step in the great cosmic dance of our unfoldment. It is in the desert where the veil is lifted and the truth revealed. At least, it occurs that way for me.
Many thanks for your comment.
Love and blessings
Judith
it is an old myth, the concept of leaving all aspects of one's idea of 'self', to disattach from everything one has learned, to let go of every role you have been taught to play, to remove yourself from the theater. It is something that we all do, eventually, either at our time of death, or before. Better to do it before, do not attach to anything, remember everything is temporary, makes it easier as one leaves this place. It sort of helps not to think in linear time. I try to imagine layers upon layers of every quantum action in this 'journey' occuring simultaneously, it comforts me.
There are very dark places one goes when one is confronted with almost inconceivable trauma. They are necessary, they are even holy ground. I know these places. Of course there are many possibilities that arise, as you say, but I often wonder why the drama must even occur. I will probably never know, until I am allowed to leave it. Blessings to you, also.