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Dr. Logan Levkoff

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Without Education, Put Away the Breast Milk Baby

Posted: 07/20/11 04:25 PM ET

By now you may have heard that a new baby doll is hitting our shelves. But this isn't any old doll. It's Breast Milk Baby, the world's first breastfeeding doll, now arriving in American toy stores. (It should come as no surprise that this doll was created in Spain, not here.)

A few of my friends have emailed me to hear my professional and personal opinion about BFB. I have given it lots of thought and have come to one conclusion: I have problems with Breast Milk Baby, and not because of the common complaint that the doll sexualizes little girls.

There is absolutely nothing wrong with breastfeeding. I nursed both of my children, both at home and occasionally while "tarped" in family friendly places. When my son was four, he used to sit with me while I fed his sister. Breastfeeding, while definitely an intimate experience, is not sexual and shouldn't be treated as such. Breasts (by the way) aren't just sexual either. They serve a biological purpose and not just an erotic one.

That being said, here is my problem: We, as usual, have trouble with basic anatomy.
We call parts "private" instead of naming them (except of course when it comes to the "vajajay," a gross misnomer for vulva).

American dolls don't have genitals. (French ones do. Check out Corolle's Emma and Paul.) We have debate on whether or not our five-year-olds (kindergarteners) should learn the accurate terms for their genitals (feel free to see an old Fox News debate of mine here).

We have dolls that drink from magic bottles. We have dolls that urinate out of a hole between their legs. But even those dolls with "biological functions" don't have genitals.

So my beef really isn't with the doll; my beef is with our culture. How are kids supposed to make sense of Breast Milk Baby if the majority of their dolls are missing genitals a la Barbie and Ken? How are they supposed to understand Breast Milk Baby if we debate whether or not it's okay for our children to see OUR own breasts?

I have written about our fascination with breasts before (check out Part I and Part II). In the past 18 months, we have had issues with our children seeing breasts -- even when it comes to preventing breast cancer and with our kids seeing cleavage, i.e. Katy Perry on Sesame Street.

Introducing BMB in American culture further complicates our relationship with breasts. Sure, breastfeeding is natural, wonderful, and something we shouldn't be embarrassed by or ashamed of, but think about how we really treat breasts in pop culture and in our own homes. If we have a healthy attitude about them, then this doll is no big deal. But if we don't, well, then we have a bigger problem.

I suppose, in the end, if my son or daughter wants to play with Breast Milk Baby, I won't have an issue with it -- but only because they have an amazing understanding of bodies, babies and pregnancy. But if we introduce it out of context and without having provided our children with a positive (and complete) perspective of human anatomy, all it does is perpetuate our overwhelming obsession with women's breasts. And that's not healthy.


 
 
 

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09:57 PM on 07/21/2011
As I'm sure you have heard, the doll is criticized for "oversexualizing" young girls who play with them. Some go as far as insinuating that the doll will encourage young women to get pregnant at a very young age. I see no reason for alarm here. If anything, the doll might be one outlet for girls to identify with their mothers and explore their feelings about being a woman. At an age where children do not have the verbal and cognitive capacity to speak about their feelings and reflect the way most adults do, fantasy play is their form of expression. Through play, children explore and make sense of their internal and external world. The "Breast Milk Baby" is one outlet for this exploration and in my opinion, not unlike the anatomically correct, urinating baby, doctor set, mini strollers and bottles. That being said, it is not necessary to have a doll of this kind. The imaginative minds of many young children can engage in rich fantasy play without such a realistic aid, but I do not think such a product is detrimental.

Ari Fox, LCSW
www.copewithschool.com
Child and Adolescent Psychotherapist
05:23 PM on 07/21/2011
Huh? You aren't giving little girls enough credit. They are far smarter than you seem to think.

This doll will help girls see their breasts as something more than just sexual objects. It won't make girls "obsess" over their breasts, but rather teach them that breasts are primarily for feeding babies.

And guess what? Long before this doll came on the market, girls have been pretending to breast feed their baby dolls, when they have an adult role model who breastfeeds.
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HUFFPOST BLOGGER
Dr. Logan Levkoff
sexologist, sex educator, intellisexual, and mom
09:30 PM on 07/21/2011
Actually, I give girls - and boys - a tremendous amount of credit. And as for "they are far smarter than you seem to think," I am a girl, I know how smart we are. If you read my piece, you would have noticed that I explicitly said that my concern was not about sexualization, it was about how our culture tackles genital, sexual, and reproductive anatomy. I could care less about girls (or boys for that matter) mimicking breastfeeding with their baby dolls. For those women who choose to nurse, it is a wonderful experience. So with all due respect, it seems like your comments have little to do with anything I posted.
12:44 PM on 07/22/2011
Dr. Levkoff,

Respectfully, I don't understand how you can say " I could care less about girls (or boys for that matter) mimicking breastfeed­ing with their baby dolls" but at the same time say you have a problem with the BMB doll. All the BMB doll does is make explicit what children have been doing with other dolls for as long as humans have been making dolls.

I get the idea of using the BMB controversy as a hook to talk about how our culture needs to communicate better with children about basic body parts. But it seems to me that the BMB helps foster a healthy discussion, rather than harm it, by encouraging little girls to do what comes naturally -- imitate what they see their mothers do.

Perhaps it would be better to focus your critique on something more deserving of criticism, like the Barbie doll, which has breasts but no nipples and is never promoted as being motherly. That's got to cause a lot more confusion to little girls than giving them a baby doll which encourages them to pretend to nurse like their mom.
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
Joseph Furtenbacher
No one you know...
01:35 AM on 07/21/2011
I think you can safely say 'Ta-ta' to the idea that very many sexually uneducated children will receive this doll...