Death Makes Life Clear

I just returned to Boston from New York City where I officiated a memorial service for a precious woman who, in my less-than-humble opinion, died too young. She was 39; she left behind an adored husband and two daughters, ages five and two.

The service was what it was meant to be. We remembered and celebrated the important gifts her life gave us. We made space for our longing in the days to come.

Death, whether we like it or not, makes life exceedingly clear.

In the hours after her memorial, person after person came up to me to thank me for what I'd said, and each, in his or her own way, acknowledged that this hastily-ended life make them think about how they are leading their own singular existence here on Earth.

I encouraged everyone present to do something, anything, whatever they could dream up, that was excessively good -- for themselves -- in the memory of our friend.

My message hit home. Several people approached me with business ideas that they'd been considering, but were now determined to pursue.

Others told me they would go into counseling to clear up some mess or other.

Still others said they would pursue artistic endeavors that they'd put off for whatever reason.

Even more told me that they would take a page out of our deceased beloved's book and create a genuine spiritual practice for themselves.

Death makes life so clear.

My heart aches for the family she's left behind, and rejoices in the valuable lesson her life gives all of us: this life that we each lead in this place and this time is the only one we'll get in just quite this format. Live it to the fullest.

Sweet friend, we'll miss you; thank you for teaching us so exquisitely.

Visit Susan Corso's spiritual blog or subscribe to Seeds at www.susancorso.com.

 

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Comments

[SarcasticFringehead]

05:21 PM on 02/05/2009

"Lord Avalokiteshvara, the Lord of Love, would never take anyone before it was the right time". I guess this idea give you comfort. People cling to all sorts of ideas to give them comfort in the face of loss and death. I'm ambivalent about it, myself. To me, death is many things at once: the Great Equalizer; the Liberator; the Teacher; the Unknown; the Terrible. I try not to fear death, but I do. I fear that when the moment comes I will be in a state of horror and anguish when it happens. My hope is, that instead, I will be at peace and be ready when it comes. I will find out eventually, as we all will.

[Dr. Susan Corso]

12:28 PM on 02/05/2009

Dear Arithrianos, I completely agree with you, and yet, as humans, there are residual feelings that need to be addressed, especially in a case like this one. Thanks for commenting.

[Arithrianos]

12:36 PM on 02/04/2009

In my opinion there is no such thing as dying too young, Lord Avalokiteshvara, the Lord of Love, would never take anyone before it was the right time, but i do understand the sentiment. Death and life are not seperate events, nor is one a beginning and the other an ending. Death and life are interdependent co-arisings each completely dependent upon the other for existance, and both are equally valuable and lovely. It is Ego that is afraid of death since Ego never actualy exists in the first place and death is the one strong event that is universal and is completly incompatable with Egos deusion, it cannot be manipulated or barganed with which is Egos favorite strategy. Because it dosn't fit with ego's plans it is often offers a breathing space away for the same old Egoic games for those who are ready. Sounds like a lot of people got a break from their Egos, Hurray!