Too Sensitive? Try Emotional Freedom

I'd like to have lunch with Judith Orloff.

Her latest book, Emotional Freedom, is a gift to those of us who are often called "too sensitive." Dr. Orloff is a psychiatrist and an intuitive, a self-described energy psychiatrist (I have to applaud her for that alone!) and her passion in life has been integrating the two rather than choosing one or the other. Take it from an intuitive, she's done a very, very good job of it.

One of the things I thoroughly enjoyed about her book is that Dr. Judith uses stories from her own life and her own spiritual process to explain that she, like the rest of us, is working on emotional freedom. She describes what she calls "arthritic coping skills," meaning old ways of reacting to life's experiences.

Oh do I know what she means! In 27 years of spiritual counseling, I've seen all sorts of us use old coping methods that no longer work. This book is a serious upgrade. She addresses dreaming, and how to use it for growth. She speaks to emotional vampires--those people who are a drain on your energy and how to both disempower them, and learn from them.

Dr. Orloff's stance is distinctly spiritual and thoroughly grounded in everyday reality. She uses her medical training to support her spiritual orientation. I envy her patients. They have the best of both worlds in Dr. Judith.

Part Two of the book is all about tools for liberation--practical, real, apply-now tools that anyone who is committed to their own growth can use to instant advantage. Dr. Judith knows the secret of relationship; she knows that we attract those things which are unresolved in ourselves. To know this fact is liberating in itself! There is no blame for what we attract; no, there are only things to learn and grow through.

These chapters pair positives and negatives in a very useful way. Consider these from her chapter headings: Fear and Courage, Frustration/Disappointment and Patience, Loneliness and Connection, Anxiety/Worry and Inner Calm, Depression and Hope, Jealousy/Envy and Self-Esteem, Anger and Compassion.

In each of these chapters, the bulk of the book, Dr. Judith teaches us how to work through the emotions on four levels: biological, spiritual, energetic and psychological. By approaching these feelings from so many different perspectives, she deftly addresses the disparate approaches to them in all different human beings. For example, I tend to experience fear somatically. My tummy gets riled up, I breathe shallowly, I become hugely critical. By giving me tools to address the biology of fear, my somatic responses have lessened, a good lesson (pun intended) learned.

Because I was invited to review Dr. Orloff's book, I read it carefully. I need to cop to the fact that I probably would not have bought the book myself. I deal with the emotions of human beings all the time, and I have my own experience to rely on. No matter, I'm so glad I read her book.

Consider this opening sentence to her final chapter and you'll know why: "Emotional freedom is an inner peace movement that is birthed from within each one of us, then emanates into the world. The starting place is always you. The more peace you enjoy, the more that energy ripples out to everyone." And there you have it! This is why emotional freedom is to be desired by all of us--because it contributes to the cause nearest and dearest to my own heart, inner peace.

She goes on, "Advocates for peace must know what it is to feel peaceful." Amen!

And, "Emotional freedom tilts the tipping point toward goodness. It allows us to experience inner peace so that outer peace can prosper." She is so right on.

Dr. Judith, how's next Wednesday for that lunch?

For spiritual nourishment, go to www.susancorso.com.

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Comments

[w0rld0fw0rcraft]

i wonder how that book would read to a person with autism.

[MerhabaAbi]

Without fear courage would not exist. Couragousness is performing in the face of fear.

Peace,
little brother

[RadicalRepublican]

Hi Dr. Susan,

"Arthritic coping skills" instantly caught my attention. It reminds me that all too many adults are walking around living their lives by decisions they made in Kindergarten or near in age to it. I've found that I am regularly having to re-think what I think I know. I begin to answer a question and realize in mid-sentence that I'm answering on auto-pilot rather then concidering the question and responding based upon what I've learned in life.

RR

[gfdanonymous]

Dr. Judith Orloff rulz
rulz
rulz
I've been a fan since Second Sight.
Her books have helped improved my life (and, hopefully, those around me).
Beileve you me......she is one of a kind!!!

[CosmicChaos]

Assisting people to help themselves allows sensitive people to help others without breaking themselves down too much.

Example: Giving a homeless person a job or a place that they can list as a permanent address (to get mail or other things in life that are only possible with an address) is much better than just cash.

However, it is important for a sensitive person to not get their well being tied up with others do with your assistance. If sensitive person does, they will break apart.

Example: The homeless person decides that they don't like the job because the manager is mean to them about thier clothes, smell, behavior, ... There is little the sensitive person can do unless they are also helping the homeless person with each stage of their reentry into society and even then they can't blame themselves if it doesn't work out.

The main thing to learn from an emotional vampire is how to "shut off" the outside input so you can stop feeling everyone's pain for 5 minutes and deal with your own. Not to make it a permanent valve, but it is a useful one if the sensitive person is getting overwhelmed.

Certain professions train people to "shut off" the outside input, so unfeeling monsters are more common. Doctors and Lawyers are two professions that teach this skill, mostly to protect the practioners.

[GrainOSand]

Give freely and be free of that which ye give.

I am super or hyper sensitive, thus I can understand how one could be damaged by expectations. Getting rid of expectations concerning others was a quantum leap I am still unraveling...that I am still reaping the harvest of...as working knowledge of life and that amorphous fleeting thing called self. In a moment of crushing despair (for the flesh resident ego) I chose love over false pride, begetting foolish emotion, begetting a need to strike out violently in enraged childish vengeance. That forever told me that emotionally, I had transcended the limiting confines of this earthly environment of love given -- love expected/demanded. That forever changed my trajectory in terms of how I define “being ok”. That moment made me self-sustaining forever. I would have been justified in being violent in almost any court in America, given the circumstances, but the laws I conceive of said love thy assailant as you love yourself. I am not going to hurt myself so I cannot hurt others in all cases except that of life preserving self defense or defense of innocents.

It is said love is never a cage, it is always -- lift for wings of flight to heights unknown.

[GrainOSand]

Which is to say, expectations of reciprocal love is a weight that holds down the heart that deserves to soar because it loves, not because of an expectation of love returned. I am complete in simply being loving. If I am loved that is always considered better than being hated but I do not pursue being loved. I became this way in this big old environment of hate called America. Where selfishness rules and glitter fools some to think that value and worth is a surface concern.

Love is binary. It is never a dimmer switch. It is on or it is off. My love is on and I tore out the dial so that it remains on, which means that even when it is dark, there is always the light of love. Love is on or off as stated, but what animates the love is the relationship in which it plays out, which is bound to be different in execution and manifestation of expression and not depth or intensity of concern, from person to person.

These things I posit are not presented as eternal truths (for any but me) just reflections bounced through the ether to warm and inform if they will, to strengthen and steady if they can, for love says one must sow the seeds.

[khanti]

There are pros and cons being a sensitive person. Yoy feel for others at the same time it can also emotionally disturbed quite easily. Learning to balance our sensitivity is simply finding out the truth and using this truth to seee things as it is.
When I ventured out to work I saw many homeless, beggars and hadicapped people. Each night I return home feeling sad and desperate to help them. Donations from my meagre earnings were just not enough to help these people.
It was much later after reading some religious books that the feeling I had for others is call compassion. So I connect with Dr. Oloff's statement that:-
"Emotional freedom is an inner peace movement that is birthed from within each one of us, then emanates into the world. The starting place is always you. The more peace you enjoy, the more that energy ripples out to everyone."
Compassion.

[Jonathan Ewald]

Spiritual nourishment? Doubt it...

[JustV]

Thank you, J.E., for this scintillating contribution to our discussion.

[yellowdoggie]

Jonathan, it sounds as if you need to read the book! ;-)

[Nikki Leigh]

This is a great article and gives great insights into some of the people who can benefit from this book.

We're told to be sensitive and caring, then we're called too sensitive. We reach out to people who need help and then find ourselves discouraged and depressed because we've been drawn into their problems. The cycle goes on and on until we read Dr Orloff's book which provides so many ways to evaluate ourselves and others to find the best way to help them - while ALSO protecting our own well being. Seems like a book that many people need to read - I've given a number of copies to friends and family who desperately need to hear this information. Thank you so much for sharing these insights with your blog readers.