Bodymind Wisdom: It's Not Only Skin Deep

Sarah, one of our students, always started coughing and would break out in a rash whenever she spoke with her mother on the phone. She would put the phone down and her skin would start itching and getting red. After this had happened three or four times Sarah got the message. According to bodymind understanding, her skin was telling her that there was some repressed emotion in her towards her mother that she needed to release and heal.

Through the skin we face the world, and are known by it. Every feeling has an effect--the feeling passing through into the nerve transmitters--hence we blush with embarrassment, go red with anger, go white or sweat with fear, get goose bumps with excitement or horror. Some have "thick skin" because they appear less sensitive to feelings or criticism, while others have "thin skin" indicating they are too highly sensitive. And it is always our own: we can never change or replace our skin, no matter how often we may want to "jump out" of it!

In Deb's award winning book, Your Body Speaks Your Mind, she explains how psycho/emotionally our skin is our boundary, the meeting place between ourselves and the outer world. Skin issues therefore, often arise when someone or something has crossed that boundary and "got under our skin", or where communication is making our "skin crawl". We may be feeling invaded, trespassed upon, or have gone beyond our limitations and reached out to far. Or perhaps we are limiting ourselves too much, holding back inside while putting up a protective cover.

Skin issues are also about touch and feel issues. Touching is the most basic form of communication and is essential to life--without it young babies will mentally and physically deteriorate, while adults feel lonely and psychologically deprived and can develop mental illness, as if they are shriveling up inside a shell. We are tactile creatures, so being starved of touch is the ultimate isolation, hence the importance of hugging and holding. Through the skin we communicate our feelings with another person, we give and receive reassurance, love and caring, and the knowledge that we are safe. A mother animal licks her newborn into life, and a child is soothed of its upset by a tender hug.

However, touch associated to trauma or abuse can create long-term conflict, making it difficult to be touched again; past fear can make us withdraw and refuse tactile intimacy. Skin is the primary sex organ as its sensitivity is so stimulating, but such sensitivity and intimacy can also make us hot with anger, fear or resentment if it is abused.

With melanoma, there are obvious environmental causes, such as the decrease in the ozone layer and the increase in carcinogens. But melanoma also implies that our self-protection is down, due to someone or something penetrating our boundaries. Either something is affecting us and causing deep turmoil from the outside; or that turmoil is inside and is trying to make itself known. It may be connected with issues of touch, intimacy, sexuality, self-acceptance or self-dislike, made worse with stress and emotional upset. The result is that we feel raw, unprotected, and exposed.

Skin Review
If you have skin difficulties, ask yourself the following questions:
*Are my boundaries being penetrated against my wishes?
*What and who is getting under my skin?
*Am I limiting or protecting myself too much, hiding behind a protective cover?
* Am I trying to break free of restrictions being imposed on me?
*Is a fear of intimacy making me want to resist touching and feeling?

*****

Ed and Deb Shapiro are bestselling authors of Your Body Speaks Your Mind, corporate consultants, meditation teachers, and the creators of Chillout daily text messages on Sprint cell phones.
See their website: www.EdandDebShapiro.com

Follow Ed and Deb Shapiro on Twitter: www.twitter.com/edanddebshapiro

Comments

[Swerinjer2]

That closeup photo of the fingers making an O is deeply offensive to some cultures. It symbolizes a certain body part below the back and above the heels.

[Ed and Deb Shapiro - Huffpost Blogger]

Actually it is a peace symbol. You see great Yogis and yoga practitioners, people who do yoga using this peace symbol all over the world. It is also symbolic in other traditions. I have never known it to mean anything else as it has been used for centuries. It is possibly one of the most positive symbols I have ever known. It is meant to bring pace to the person who uses it when meditating. It also is meant to radiate peace to others.

May all beings be happy and peaceful.

[Swerinjer2]

one mans peace symbol is another mans o-ring.

[krcok]

Ed and Deb, Thank you both so much for another wonderful posting. An observation I have made while caring for my 92 year old mother: She always needs her back scratched. I am starting to think it is the only excuse she has for asking to be touched. I will scratch now with much more love.

Again, Thank you for the wisdom and thought provocation.

[Ed Shapiro - Huffpost Blogger]

Dear Krcok, How wonderful to have a 92 year old mom. It touches my heart that you can be caring for her. She must be a lucky lady. Keep scratching, smiling and enjoying her while she is still here.

[Swerinjer2]

I strongly disagree.

[WA-violins]

Loved this article! Years ago I trained as a massage tech, and it completely changed my life. Did it professionally for a few years. But now, just for close friends. I treat myself regularly to a massage from a technician who has incredible sensitivity. I've often wondered what our society would be like if everyone were required to take a massage class at some point in their young life.

[premurti]

I love my skin, in fact it's my favorite organ. For years I didn't even realize it was considered an organ. Since learning to care for it with dry brush massage, (for exfoliating) then hot / cold showers, followed by coconut oil to help keep moisture in, I have noticed that this has a profound effect on my whole system. I love my skin and I love your Bodymind Wisdom Blog. Thank You

[Ed Shapiro - Huffpost Blogger]

Premurti, I care for my skin as you do. I take hot and cold showers and use coconut oil--I get to swim daily and have excellent messages-- also meditation and visuaisation is beneficial.

Love is the best healer! Also wishing others well-- Stay healthy! Ed

[AndiG]

Ed & Deb...skin, our largest organ and what a telltale aspect of emotional body. It really makes so much sense to me as i think about all the times I've gotten hives!!! There has definitely been a connection with how I was feeling at those times. I actually remember the struggles I was having emotionally. Thanks again for such great information and reminders of our body/mind connection!
I look forward to your blog every week!

[masterswimmer]

Once again Ed & Deb you post a blog that encourages exactly what you preach, the body mind connection. I find it amazing how obvious certain connections are.......once someone broaches the subject. The other more 'conventional' organs of our bodies yell and scream when they are ailing. The skin being the largest of the bodies organs should have a way to yell and scream as well. And it does, as you have so poignantly pointed out.

Hope to hear more about ding. I need to learn Tibetan.

Stay well.

[Ed Shapiro - Huffpost Blogger]

Masterswimmer, I honor your obsevation. You are a perceptive and intelligent person.

From what I pick up you have 'Ding'.

[soundheals]

Where would we be without touch? Many consider our skin to be our most sensitive and important organ. As always, your insightful writing touches us all (pun intendend).

[CurtisLudlow]

Hi Ed and Deb,

Jack Canfield mentions the power of touch in some of his work.

Your skin review is thought provoking:

*Are my boundaries being penetrated against my wishes?
*What and who is getting under my skin?
*Am I limiting or protecting myself too much, hiding behind a protective cover?
* Am I trying to break free of restrictions being imposed on me?
*Is a fear of intimacy making me want to resist touching and feeling?

I've never really thought about my skin like this, thank you for the post.

http://bootcampfx.blogspot.com/

[Ed and Deb Shapiro - Huffpost Blogger]

I am glad you liked the blog. You might want to see Deb's book YOUR BODY SPEAKS YOUR MIND it details the bodymind relationship and gives you an interesting view on the bodymind that is quite revealing and can be very helpful.

Enjoy,
Ed

[MHaberfeld]

Great and interesting post. Thank you Ed and Deb.
Louse Hay in her book You Can Heal Your Life has this great chart of all sorts of ailments and how they relate to underlying emotions. For example, she says that a sore throat may have to do with either holding in angry words or feeling unable to express oneself. Or Colon problems--fear of letting go, holding onto the past, etc. Colds- too much going on at once, mental confusion, disorder. Etc.
When someone I know has an illness or when I do, I often wonder about what is going on emotionally or spiritually in my life that might be lending to this. The body holds much more information and has much more to say than we usually give it credit for. Perhaps we don't always know how to listen to the body. It is like my dog talking to me, I am sure she is saying lots of things, but I only understand a few of them :) And as with anything, the more we pay attention, the more we may hear.
Meredith, Life Coach, www.meredithhaberfeld.com

[Deb Shapiro - Huffpost Blogger]

Louise Hay was a wonderful pioneer in this work. And you are absolutely right that the body holds enormous information. In my book, Your Body Speaks Your Mind, I go through each part of the body and how to understand what it is saying from a psycho/emotional perspective. There are also different questions and ways you can work with yourself to understand your own bodymind. You may also want to look at some of my past blogs on this subject in the HuffPost archives. Thanks for your comment, Deb Shapiro

[Jonahson]

In ancient medical diagnosis such as those practiced in India and China some skin diseases are related to kidney function.

[Ed Shapiro - Huffpost Blogger]

Jonahson yes that is correct.

[JacquiDB]

Love what you both write every week. I've got you "under my skin" as it were!!

[Janice Taylor - Huffpost Blogger]

Well done, Deb & Ed...
... and this may be silly, but here's my favorite righteous skin-cipe.

Ingredients
one egg

Directions
break open the egg separate the white from the yolk.
beat the egg white for one minute with whisk.
gently apply this whisked white wonder to your skin and let it harden.
wash it off with warm water.
the egg white draws toxins from the skin's surface and tightens the pores as it cleans.

Anything that removes toxins is worthy of sharing!

[Ed Shapiro - Huffpost Blogger]

Thanks for the skin-cipe. It sounds wild but obviously works, I hope anyone who needs a face cleanse takes advantage of your helpful info.

[woodcut]

I've used egg whites for years = good stuff.
Please try to buy the eggs locally, & not from factory farms.
Thanks.

[ken108]

Ed and Deb are very touching indeed. Rumor has it that they are being considered for an Obama dual cabinet post - Secretaries of Love and Kindness.

[Ed Shapiro - Huffpost Blogger]

That's cause we can see Russia from Alaska and LOVE them ALL---

[Eli Davidson - Huffpost Blogger]

Yesterday, I was a guest on a conservative talk radio station on the subject: What To Do Now That Our Candidate Lost. (My mission is to help heal the political divide..so I am doing shows of both the blue and red persuasion.)

I could feel my skin flush when I heard callers talk about their "horror and fear" of an Obama presidency. Then as I rested in my heart and my humor I felt less of a need to have any armor up.

Thank you again for a fabulous post!

[Ed Shapiro - Huffpost Blogger]

Eli Deb and I never met you but it sure would be a joy some day. Your brilliance jumps right off the computer screen. This world needs compassion, wise and caring people. I feel that you and Arianna, Russell, Alex, Gay and Kathlyn, Oprah, the Dalai Lama, Obama and others have what Tibetans call 'Ding.'

Ding is a sense of self beyond confidence. Something like presence. An energy that when you are with that person you feel good. Since it is a Tibetan word it's is not too easy to interpret.

[Waylon Lewis - Huffpost Blogger]

Another wise post—thank you for that. My Buddhist teacher, Sakyong Mipham Rinpoche, once told me and my 'sangha' that half of our state of mind is dependent on as simple a thing as our posture at any given moment. Something that's always stuck with me. If you're depressed, try and take a relaxed, upright posture. If you're speedy, try and slow your speech and movements down and your mind will follow.

As for skin, my friend Josh Onysko of Pangea says that something like 87% of what we put on our skin is absorbed—so aside from the wisdom above, be sure to use real organics, not that conventional chemical-laden cheap stuff—ultimately it's not cheaper, as your health might very well pay a bigger price.

[Ed Shapiro - Huffpost Blogger]

Waylon a man with great energy! I have seen your Magazine ELEPHANT wonderful visual. It's good to see you are blogging for HuffPost you are an ocean of wisdom. A natural born 'talent.'
Yes skin is like a mirror we can larn so much about ourselves.

Deb's book YOUR BODY SPEAKS YOUR MIND is required reading in many alternative healing schools.