Have you ever felt as if your mind was driving you crazy? Does the chatter in your head ever feel like it goes on endlessly? Meditation appears to be a simple answer to this: just calm the mind and pay attention to the present. Then how come it is not so easy? My thoughts are driving me mad! My mind will not be quiet! I can't relax! Sound familiar?
The mind is notoriously resistant to being quiet, so as soon as we sit still it seems to do everything it can to distract us. Habitual thinking kicks in and within a few minutes an internal dialogue takes over, the body starts to fidget, or trivial things that need to be done suddenly appear vitally important. The mind has often been compared to a "drunken monkey bitten by a scorpion." Just as a monkey leaps from tree to tree, so the mind leaps from one drama to another, constantly distracted.
When we start to meditate we then find all this chaotic activity going on and it seems so noisy that we believe that we cannot possibly be still. Actually, it is simply because we are now becoming aware of the noise, whereas before we were so immersed in it we were unaware that such chatter was so constant.
In our book, Be The Change, Professor Robert Thurman says: "The first step is to try to focus our mind on something, like counting the breath. When we do, we see all these runaway thoughts that race through the mind, like I wonder when my car will be ready, is my parking meter overdue, will I get a ticket, is my girlfriend happy? Our minds are filled with these preoccupations, and we do not even realize it. But we can just let them go and bring the mind back to something we do want to focus on. This is a beginning, calming, waking-up step. But more important is to choose positive thoughts to focus on, such as I want to be more loving to that person who annoys me, I want to be more content, I want to be more friendly, peaceful, happy, and I no longer need to suffer."
Having a busy mind is very normal. Someone once estimated that in any one thirty-minute session of meditation we may have upward of three hundred thoughts. After years of distraction the mind is not always so ready to be quiet. We cannot suddenly turn our thinking off; that would be like trying to catch the wind. But having a busy mind does not mean we cannot meditate, it just means we are like everyone else. What we can do is make friends with our mind, thereby changing it from being an enemy to our ally.
Meditation takes awareness and a willingness to keep going. The good news is that it is not possible to fail! As you continue, it will begin to feel more natural and cool things will start to happen. Being still happens in a moment, but it may take some time before that moment comes. Remember, it is a great gift to yourself!
In other words, meditation is a letting go of resistance, of whatever may arise: doubt, worry, feelings of inadequacy, the endless dramas and desires. Every time you find your mind is drifting, daydreaming, remembering the past or planning the future, just come back to now, come back to this moment. In meditation, paying attention is both the key and the practice. To be with what is; nothing else is going on.
One way to become more focused is to label the thoughts. If you drift off into thinking, silently repeat: thinking, thinking. Ed likes to repeat monkey mind, monkey mind, when meaningless thoughts appear. If you get distracted, simply label it distraction, distraction. You can also see thoughts like clouds in the sky, just moving through the sky without stopping, or like birds and watch them fly away. Everything comes and goes, nothing stays, no matter how strong or insistent the thought or feeling may be. There is no need to struggle; meditation is really your best friend.
Breath Awareness Meditation
Sit comfortably with a straight back so you can breathe easily and freely. Hands are resting in your lap. Eyes are closed or lowered. Take a deep breath and let it go.
Now simply focus on the natural in and out flow of your breathe without trying to change it in any way. Let your breathing be normal and relaxed; your attention still and focused.
If you find you are getting distracted or caught up in thinking, simply label your thoughts as distraction or thinking and let them go, or see them as birds in the sky and let them fly away. Do your best to do this for at least ten minutes. Just breathing and being.
When you are ready, take a deep breath. Gently open your eyes.
Is your mind like a drunken monkey? How do you find quiet? Do comment below. You can receive notice of our blogs every Tuesday by checking Become a Fan at the top.
You can learn more in our latest book: BE THE CHANGE, How Meditation Can Transform You and the World, or from our three meditation CD's.
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Enjoy our Friday weekly blogs on Oprah.com/spirit
Ed and Deb Shapiro's book, BE THE CHANGE, How Meditation Can Transform You And The World, forewords by the Dalai Lama and Robert Thurman, with contributors Marianne Williamson, astronaut Edgar Mitchell, Jane Fonda, and others.
We will be teaching at the Institute of Noetic Sciences in California, June 18-20, with special guest speaker astronaut Edgar Mitchell
Our 3 meditation CD's: Metta--Loving kindness and Forgiveness; Samadhi-Breath Awareness and Insight; and Yoga Nidra-Inner Conscious Relaxation, are available at: www.EdandDebShapiro.com
Follow Ed and Deb Shapiro on Twitter: www.twitter.com/edanddebshapiro
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I like when you say:
She's not a bad monkey. She's restless and likes to play and I need to be patient with her, like I would with any child. She's just little!!! So we've come up with this arrangement. I visualize her (and she's definitely a little girl monkey) and when she starts getting rambunctious when I'm trying to be still and she wants to play, I visualize calling her over and pulling her into my arms. She curls up on my chest, lying right on the sternum and I "watch" her back moving up and down with my breath. And then my little monkey moves into me and the places where my body is reluctant to let go of tension, she moves in and massages that part. (with breath).
In the dharma
Ed
Fortunately I've been through this before and it makes me smile, even laugh, and then I can relax and settle in for ... whatever follows. It may be peaceful and quiet, and it may be more nonsense. Whatever!
(And "Whatever!" is my favorite mantra!)
Allow this.
Gassho.
I like the way you expressed your situation and how ya deal with it
I chose you as a HuffPost Pick!
Enjoy the journey,
Ed
Of course the phrase "monkey mind" is familiar-- and that's why a few weeks back when a nature show appeared on the TV featuring monkeys-- I figured: "Let's see just who this little guy is.."
At first they seemed so cute-- like cats-- but smarter and with more of a humanoid face and shape.
They chattered and shrieked and were really quite clever and "on it" in terms of the survival game.
But after a while, I began to see that they did have quite an edge, and were tricky-- and in the end, a bit tiresome-- like that nagging part of oneself that can't quite mature. And then I realized that it was the desperate game of survival. They were frantic. They couldn't let go.
A cat will hunt-- but then chill out and self-restore. But monkeys are very driven by the sympathetic nervous system. So for me, it's really about letting that mental -- survival loop take a rest. So it's no surprise in times of transition, the inner monkey will be seizing the wheel to drive the car. Let the money take a back seat, sit in plush, and be chauffeured and enjoy the view as it flows by..
love,
Alison
thanks for your interesting story
I like what you say here:
"A cat will hunt-- but then chill out and self-restore. But monkeys are very driven by the sympathetic nervous system. So for me, it's really about letting that mental -- survival loop take a rest. So it's no surprise in times of transition, the inner monkey will be seizing the wheel to drive the car. Let the money take a back seat, sit in plush, and be chauffeured and enjoy the view as it flows by..:
have fun always,
Ed
I do know all about monkey mind! I tend to live life with multiple channels all going simultaneously. For me, it is often a sort of pleasant surprise when yoga or meditation allows a break for the monkey mind and I feel more clear, creative and often answer questions I have been pondering.
Thanks for the great reminders!
K
It sure is good to have ways of making friends with our monkey mind
as the mind is a great servant but a terrible master
In joy,
Ed
enjoy the journey,
Ed
The way I figure it is that since we are all One, and we are all waves of the ocean of Life, even our monkeys deserve compassion, humor, forgiveness, and, dare I say it, love?
You'll notice one particular monkey antic in my blog down the road from yours this Wednesday.
Sweet dreams, my friends!
Love,
Cara
when taking the Bodhisattva Vow in Tibetan Buddhism you commit:
'Not to put anyone out of your heart!"
Ed
You say this sooo well:
"My monkey teaches me when its time to pay attention. That means pretty much every moment."
love ya monkey meditation :-)
Love ya,
Ed
Leave ti to you to talk about the Drunken Monkey in our mind.
Embracing my mind like a dear friend is such a wonderful intention. You are both such incredible inspiration to all of us. I adore the way you hold the lantern of loving and acceptance.
You Rock!
Eli Davidson
you bring Joy and Light - you are LOVE
it is great to know we are all in it together - happy trails
Big Hugs,
Ed
Honestly... I can't do it. I have yet to be able to let everything go from my head. I have tried so many different approaches, but nothing works for me. When (not if) my mind starts to wander, and I focus on trying to keep it from wandering.... I just start free-associating with whatever mechanism I use to try to stop it. I think "monkey mind" and the next thing I know I'm reciting Indiana Jones quotes.
I think a lot of you might suggest that I'm going into this with the wrong attitude. I haven't always had this attitude. I gave it a fair go many many times. Sometimes you just have to throw in the towel. Or at least toss it in the dirty clothes pile to be washed.
and sharing-
why not just don't try anything - neither give it alcohol or take away anything .. JUST SEE .. watch it do it's thing whatever it is drink - wander etc. .. by just not struggling it will settle by itself
it's really all up to you.
whether you throw in the towel or toss it in the dirty clothes doesn't really matter. What matters is that you care.
let's not take ourselves too seriously - laugh a lot and have fun I bet you do - or maybe not?
Ed
So you can device many ways to overcome these problems, like the mindfulness of breath as it leaves the nostril at a point. Just natural breathing until you can feel the breath as smooth as silk. Perhaps count the breath or use a short mantra or even observe the rising and falling of the abdomen.
Like you describe a wandering mind as a drunken monkey some texts describe it as a wandering bull. So the best way to tame it is to tie it down with a short rope on to a stake. In other words whenever a mind wanders from focus just bring it back repeatedly to the object of your focus. Once you have focus then the real meditation proper begins.
enjl what you say here:
"Like you describe a wandering mind as a drunken monkey some texts describe it as a 'wandering bull.'
much metta-
Jygpo - Ed
this is great poetry - I love it!
I hope the viewers will feast their eyes on your comment for sure
I chose you as a HuffPost Pick!
If not NOW when
Ed
your input is appreciated
John Gray and John Hagelin both TM long time advocates and main teachers are contributors in our recent book
BE THE CHANGE
How Meditation Can Transform You and the World
"Excerpt, Side-Effects section: "Not all effects of the practice of meditation are beneficial. Shapiro (1992) found that 62.9% of the subjects reported adverse effects during and after meditation and 7.4% experienced profoundly adverse effects. The length of practice (from 16 to 105 months) did not make any difference to the quality and frequency of adverse effects. These adverse effects were relaxation-induced anxiety and panic; paradoxical increases in tension; less motivation in life; boredom; pain; impaired reality testing; confusion and disorientation; feeling 'spaced out'; depression; increased negativity; being more judgmental; and, ironically, feeling addicted to meditation.
"Other adverse effects described (Craven, 1989) are uncomfortable kinesthetic sensations, mild dissociation, feelings of guilt and, via anxiety-provoking phenomena, psychosis-like symptoms, grandiosity, elation, destructive behaviour and suicidal feelings. Kutz et al. (1985a,b) described feelings of defenselessness, which in turn produce unpleasant affective experiences, such as fear, anger, apprehension and despair." "
http://www.behind-the-tm-facade.org/transcendental_meditation-harmful-abstracts.htm
Over thousands of years people have been meditating and finding all sorts of benefits.
What has meditation done for you- have you tried it?
Do see our book
BE THE CHANGE
How Meditation Can Transform You and the World
Dr and Scientist Richard Davidson has done research on the many benefits of meditation.
I have been meditating and teaching internationally for over 40 years and can only say
The Greatest Gift You Can Give Yourself is MEDITATION
Treasure Yourself,
Ed
Man, for me that's a typical Thursday.
Life is full! It's not always full of light and love and laughs. That's not what I meditate for. WITH meditation, joy comes from embracing all the shades and flavors of this human experience. So much richness to be found when we open to all that we are...!
I so agree with what you are saying. I have an entire book, A Course In Feedom, The Drunken Monkey Speaks, that is devoted to this drunken monkey mind phenomenon, and how to get some control over the ways in which it takes hold.
Of course, it's sneaky, and can suck us in to dis-empowering stories - often in the most subtle of ways.
I love your suggestion about watching the breath. I am also a film director, and I find that observing the breath, even while I'm working, keeps me in touch with the power of my true self.
Wishing you the cause of every good and wonderful thing,
Lawrence
PS - Keep up the great work.
A Course In Freedom - The Drunken Monkey Speaks - sounds great
I believe I received an email about a program you are teaching - do connect with us!
Joyfully,
Ed
After flirting with meditation and often falling asleep while doing it (guess I wasn't ready for all that awareness), I took a meditation class last year and made a commitment to sit every day. A few weeks into the class, our teacher asked us how we were doing. One by one, each person said things like: "I find I can really stay calm while being confronted by my boss" or "I seem to be getting along better with my teenager". When the class turned to me, all I had was: "I feel more neurotic than ever." Our teacher just smiled.
When labeling "thinking", I say "Just thinking, little Usedtobequiet" (but I use my real name : ) It sounds less harsh that way.
I also count laps when I am swimming which has a kind of meditative quality to it.
Thanks for this piece.
Usedtobequiet (one of my nicknames is Monkey)
drunken monkeys like used to things... ha
well it is great that you have added meditation into your life
your in the flow with how you do it
I love your monkey attitude - may you see the true nature of your mind - empty and infinitely beautiful
Ed
One thing I like about meditating is that I get to observe my thinking without having an emotional attachment to the thoughts. If I notice myself getting lured into contemplation about one of the figurative branches my mind jumped to, I internally tell myself to just let that thought go for now, I can dwell on it later if I need to. I don't really put it out of mind, that'd just make me obsess on it. It''s only on the shelf, available.
Great post.
Love,
little brother
this sounds like a reasonable view and way to deal with your thinking
but
do you come back to it again? or just let it go- is it a way to trick or treat your mind-- cause then you will have a lot of paper work to deal with - ha
Cheers,
Ed
First, I love the hilarious title!! Sounds like a funny zen proverb, yet captures within it a profound truth. When drunk, one wanders and stumbles aimlessly, has little or no self control, and gets temporary satisfaction from the alcohol yet the hangover can be pretty brutal. The egoic mind embodies all these characteristics as well which is why the word drunk in your title is so appropriate. However, when the mind endowed with wisdom reflects a spiritual essence the mind is no longer blithering and ceaseless storm of confusion and suffering, it becomes a radiant and harmonious presence that guides, provides insight, and helps infuse wisdom and spirit into our daily existence, because it is one with the Divine Mind. The sufis say become a mirror that reflects the Beloved, and Rumi wrote a treasure trove of poems on becoming a mirror in which God is reflected. The mind is a corner in this mirror that can fully reflect and absorb the fullness of God, Spirit, Divinity, and when it does the illusions of a fragmented mind disappear, and the truth of Union appears.
I therefore have you as a HuffPost Pick!
there is a wealth in this so when you say this it is spot on:
"when the mind endowed with wisdom reflects a spiritual essence the mind is no longer blithering and ceaseless storm of confusion and suffering, it becomes a radiant and harmonious presence that guides, provides insight, and helps infuse wisdom and spirit into our daily existence, because it is one with the Divine Mind."
Joyfully,
Ed