Help For Oprah: 'Tis the Season of the Binge

OPRAH!!! (I am saying that in your Oprah show voice...so hopefully you will hear me.) O Magazine just arrived on my doorstep. There you are. Skinny Oprah and Fat Oprah. I feel your pain. I have been there.

Your comments tell me that a diet you haven't tried is TLC -- The Low Criticism Diet. You are teaching living from the inside out, and I will wager you a very large some of money (in Eli dollars) that if you really give yourself the TLC Diet, that will be the last diet you will need. I will be sharing it with you over the next month. But first:

Stop beating yourself up. Stop the rigid diets. Start accepting yourself.

Self criticism is one of the most fattening things around. The more you demean yourself for having a 'food mistake' the more you fuel having a binge. One binge fuels the next and all of a sudden you can't fit in your Obama Inauguration dress.

Until you reinvent your way of being with yourself, your weight is always going to victimize you.

Oprah, when you say, "I'm embarrassed. I'm mad at myself." you show that you haven't addressed the judgmental mindset that is a key component of yo-yo dieting. I should know, I have waged the same battle myself. The Low Criticism Diet is the only diet that silenced the insanity of my 20 year battle with food.

Remember food isn't the issue. Self love is. Don't feel bad, Oprah. Women gain between 8 and 15 pounds between Halloween and Christmas, said Jone Novek, wellness expert in Scottsdale, Arizona New York City. As an executive coach for women I am seeing a trend of working women putting their health at the bottom of their "To Do List." Does this sound like you, Oprah? I watch more and more women grumbling at the thought of prying themselves away from the office and toward greater health. During the holidays it gets even worse.

This is the season of excess with food and alcohol, so why set yourself up for failure? Starting any kind of diet now would be crazy making. So we will take baby steps.

The first step is to get honest.

Do you binge? Here are some questions to help you assess your eating.

Quiz: Are You On the Road to A Binge?

Are you on the perfect diet . . . for a gerbil?

Do you rate your day by how well you waged your war with food?

Do you sneak food?

Do you tell others that you are on a diet but don't lose weight?

Do you eat alone often?

Do you secretly hoard or hide "bad" food?

Do you fall into a funk after seeing how much you have eaten?

Do you belittle yourself about your weight?

If you answered yes to three or more of these questions you are at risk for a bout of binge eating.

What do you do to avoid a binge? Let me know!

Ask Eli a question at [e-mail] or go to www.elidavidson.com to share your best tips on how you have lowered your overeating and increased your self care.

Eli Davidson is a nationally recognized executive coach and motivational speaker.

Her book, "Funky to Fabulous: Surefire Success Stories for The Savvy, Sassy and Swamped", (Oak Grove Publishing) has won three national book awards.

Follow Eli Davidson on Twitter: www.twitter.com/elidavidsonf2f

Comments

[skippyB]

And when you do lose weight again, and you will, try and just be with it, accept it and your new thoughts and behaviors around it .... and put your ego in a place where it can help you, and not be way out front where it has been a bit of a bully.

[Janice Taylor - Huffpost Blogger]

Hi there Eli ... Yes, it's start there, with Low Criticism and Loving Care, but it's more complicated than that. I permanently removed over 50 pounds 7 years ago, have written two best selling books (perhaps you've heard of them, The Our Lady of Weight Loss Books??? :), and I too help people to love themselves.

Yes, you must love yourself; and take care of all aspects of your life. If the other parts of your life are out of alignment - relationships, physical environment, finances, career, spirituality, creativity, fun and health - it's difficult to lose weight. It's a lifestyle that takes support and deep commitment to self. It runs deep. It's about letting go of protective layers.

Janice Taylor

[mlaiuppa]

Are you on the perfect diet . . . for a gerbil?

Do you rate your day by how well you waged your war with food?

Do you sneak food? No.

Do you tell others that you are on a diet but don't lose weight? No.

Do you eat alone often? Yes. I live alone. Duh.

Do you secretly hoard or hide "bad" food? No.

Do you fall into a funk after seeing how much you have eaten? No.

Do you belittle yourself about your weight? No.

I also don't snack.

I'd rather sleep than eat.

That's my problem. I sleep 10 hrs a day and I'd rather sleep than exercise. After an 8 hour work day I'd rather take a nap than exercise. Exercise doesn't invigorate me. It doesn't make me hungry. It doesn't reduce my appetite. It just makes me.....more tired.

[linfort]

Please don't let them cancel Eli Stone. I love this show. I NEED this show. I have never watched a show that I could care less if it continued or stopped, until Eli Stone. Please contact ABC. We need this show. It is about helping people and evolving. PLEASE don't let this happen.

[Dr. Judith Rich - Huffpost Blogger]

Dearest Winged One,

"All flights are canceled", OK, we'll make an exception. Fly safely and when you arrive in NY, be sure to tuck in your wings and stay warm.

Regarding the food department, I'm finding it very interesting this holiday season. I'm feasting, but not on food. I know it probably sounds corny, but it's true: I'm feasting on a sense of pure joy.

It's crazy, given what's going on in the world. While all around, there is suffering, angst, worry and concern (including my own at times), still, there is so much to be grateful for, I feel full. I've actually lost 3 lbs. without trying, and for me, that's quite a feat!

One might say I'm "bingeing on Joy", I wonder if Oprah has tried the "Joy Diet"? Perhaps I'll write a blog on that subject next time.

All the best to you, dear woman, and thank you for your always "hit the nail on the head" posts.
Judith

[Jason Mannino - Huffpost Blogger]

Eli:

This is great and desperately needs to be brought forward as you have done so articulately here!! Thanks!

Jason

[Swerinjer2]

I cannot disagree with you more strongly.

[Eli Davidson - Huffpost Blogger]

Dear Jason,
Thank you for showing so many how to lower their criticism and go for their dreams.

[MishkaRene]

Wow, Eli. Thank you so much for that!

This line really, really resonated with me: "Until you reinvent your way of being with yourself, your weight is always going to victimize you."

I recognize how for as long as I can remember, I have allowed myself to be a 'victim' of my weight, and I have in a sense, ENABLED myself with the destructive self-talk!

I am now on the TLC diet myself, and I have to say, the more loving I am towards myself, NO MATTER WHAT, and the more connected I am to what I am experiencing inside, the less likely I am to make poor food choices.

I love me my Oprah! And I feel her pain. I hear her struggle and hope that she too will try the TLC diet. I am hearing her beat herself up and I just want to encourage her to treat herself gently, as she would a child or pet. I can only imagine the pressures of her daily life!

Thank you again! Your post really got me in my gut. : )

[Ed and Deb Shapiro - Huffpost Blogger]

Compassionate Eli--what you say is so true. we have to learn what we teach. Oprah has some of the most brilliant people in the fields of personal development, self help and spirituality as friends and on her show and yet she falls into the same traps we all may do. In a way what she is going through is a teaching for others.
Your blog on TLC is just the solution.

your friend and fellow blogger, Ed

[Swerinjer2]

wrong. wrong wrong wrong. please can we get serious here.

[Eli Davidson - Huffpost Blogger]

Leader In Loving Ed,
Bless you for being such a guiding Light in the journey towards greater compassion and kindness.

The Stanford Forgiveness Project, developed by Dr. Luskin demonstrates the impact of lowering criticism and upping forgiveness in altering destructive habits. Here to more TLC!

Blessings to You and Deb in this Blessed Holiday Season.

[Ed and Deb Shapiro - Huffpost Blogger]

Eli, I have taught yoga nidra in prisons to heavy duty prisoners. It is similar to your TLC.

If people would follow 'The Low Criticism' Diet as well as the 'Tender Loving Care' Diet
--they would be moving in the right direction.

When you make friends with yourself you have a wonderful ally.

One Heart, One World,

Ed