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Eliot Daley

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The Presence of God in Fred Rogers' Life and Work

Posted: 06/30/11 09:21 AM ET

Fred Rogers knew so many things no one ever taught him.

One of them was the presence of God. He knew God's presence in his own life, and he knew God was present in the life of every person ever created on earth. This wasn't something he learned in his seminary studies; it was what prompted him to pursue those studies in the first place.

Fred's knowledge of God was profoundly personal -- the kind of knowing reflected in the Hebrew word "yadtha" which denotes an astonishingly provocative paired set of meanings -- the knowledge of God, and the intimate knowledge of one's lover.

And so Fred never publicly trumpeted his own experience of God or encouraged others to verbalize theirs. That would have been as inappropriate as locker-room boasting about sexual encounters. Rather, he simply expressed God's presence through his work and his relationships -- something I was privileged to share in.

One can discern both Fred's understanding of God and his regard for his audiences by considering what he did with those who entrusted him with their attention.

Let's start with the way he structured his relationship with preschool children who turned daily to "Mister Rogers' Neighborhood". He was always speaking through the television to just one child, and one child only. None of this "all you boys and girls out there in TV-land" stuff. Fred was there to befriend each child as though there were only one child out there to befriend. I have characterized the program as an illustrated phone conversation between Fred and a single child.

In keeping with this one-on-one relationship, he did not have viewer-age children on the set with him. The program features numerous adult guests Fred thought children should meet, to be sure. But age-mate preschool peers would have required his attention and compromised his commitment to be exclusively engaged through the camera with that single child at home. Worse, they might be seen by the viewer as a rival for Fred's care and affection.

WATCH JOANNE ROGERS TALK ABOUT THE LEGACY OF HER HUSBAND:


As for the agenda of "Mister Rogers' Neighborhood", it was deeply resonant with the agenda God offers us as co-creators of our life and world, and with the comfort of being held in good hands. First and always was the affirmation of unconditional love: "I like you just the way you are" is what every child heard from Fred every single day. That's a message any of us would welcome hearing ourselves.

Some parents, however, misunderstood that statement, noting a preschool child's numerous means of irritating them. But there was no reason for Fred not to deliver that message; after all, the viewing child was not annoying Fred. This isn't to say that Fred didn't have empathy for parents. Himself the father of two sons, he well knew the challenges of parenting. And some of his songs, like "What Do You Do With the Mad That You Feel", were written to help children constructively manage their own impulsive behavior.

But Fred was not there to dispense lessons and rules. He was there to be a grace note in children's lives. Fred understood the power of grace -- how a shower of affirmation nurtures the yearning to be even more of our likable selves, something criticism and exhortation rarely accomplish.

The content of the series explored a full array of the developmental tasks facing preschoolers and fostered their creativity and imagination. But any given program often began in some worrisome place where Fred knew the child might be found -- say, dwelling in anxiety about being displaced in his or her parents' affection by the newly arrived baby sibling, or fearing the possibility of being separated from one's parents. They began, in other words, in the very kinds of worrisome situations that might prompt an adult to turn to prayer.

Fred engages the child right there at the point of pain or fear, in a linked series of initiatives by him and exquisitely anticipated responses by the young viewer. Fred introduces a thought or object, the child at home is moved to think or feel something, then Fred makes a further move based on the child's likely response, followed by another response, and yet a further move ... By the end of the twenty-eight minutes and thirty-eight seconds of each program, the child is in a different place, a better place. And still right beside Mister Rogers, who has gently brought the child over there.

Fred also told each child, "You are special". Fred understood that God endows every person with unique gifts, and it was his personal mission to nurture both the gift and the child's awareness that she or he did indeed possess the gift. For Fred, life was all about bringing out the best any individual has within them -- within them, but oftentimes not yet fully realized. Not-fully-realized is obviously the case for preschoolers, whose development is still very rudimentary in comparison with what lies ahead for them in their youth, adulthood, and maturity.

But not-fully-realized is an adult condition as well, and Fred lived out his mission not only through "Mister Rogers' Neighborhood" but in his everyday adult encounters with friends, family, colleagues, and so-called strangers. He used each engagement with another person, no matter how fleeting, as an opportunity to impart a blessing of attention and affirmation on the other. He rarely failed to part from another person without leaving them feeling better about themselves and their possibilities.

Perhaps the most widely noted example of Fred's seizing such a moment was his acceptance "speech" when receiving an Emmy for Lifetime Achievement from the Academy of Television Arts and Sciences in 1998. The bejeweled audience for this gala event was made up of the most successful and celebrated (and in some instances hard-nosed) luminaries in TV. When Fred was called to the stage and microphone to receive his award, he turned the moment into a gift for everyone in the auditorium.

He looked across the gathering and said, "All of us have special ones who have loved us into being. Would you just take, along with me, ten seconds to think of the people who have helped you become who you are. Ten seconds of silence."

There was a ripple of puzzlement for an instant, so he raised his arm, conspicuously looked at his wristwatch, and said, "I'll watch the time."

The little titter of laughter faded quickly as members of the audience realized they were going to comply -- they wanted to comply -- with Fred's suggestion. Then the audience, one by one, closed their eyes and moved into a sudden, intimate encounter with some precious person who had breathed life into them -- who had enabled them to be present at such an exalted occasion as the Emmys -- and the emotions began flowing freely. In seconds, quiet weepings lurched into audible sobs, dampened eyes blinked fast and then spilled messy tears. A roomful of celebrities was deep in holy gratitude for having been loved enough to become, well, celebrities.

Fred lifted his eyes from his watch after a while and pronounced the benediction: "May God be with you." And he returned to his seat.

Note that he didn't say, "God bless you". This is important. Saying "God bless you" would have been superfluous. Fred was not goading God to up and do something useful for a change. He knew that God had already blessed them, couldn't help but bless them, would always bless them.

"May God be with you" meant, "I hope that you are aware that God is with you" -- Fred's invitation to savor God's imminence and transcendence and personal presence, and to put a Name to it.

Eliot Daley, an ordained minister in the Presbyterian Church (USA), served as president of the "Mister Rogers' Neighborhood" organization in its early days, writing a number of scripts for the program while also managing its operations.

 
Fred Rogers knew so many things no one ever taught him. One of them was the presence of God. He knew God's presence in his own life, and he knew God was present in the life of every person ever cr...
Fred Rogers knew so many things no one ever taught him. One of them was the presence of God. He knew God's presence in his own life, and he knew God was present in the life of every person ever cr...
 
 
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
BlueZoo
Independent voter, Independent thinker!
10:48 AM on 07/05/2011
I confess to watching Fred Rogers along with my wee son. I don't recall one time when Rogers mentioned any god on his program but I see he did so in his talks to groups of people. The one thing I always took away from his show was his calmness. His simple "Will you be my friend?" was so prodound in the adult world. How on earth could anyone say "no" to this kind and gentle man? We are all so much better for his having been on this good Earth!
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
DevonTexas
Eternal Optimism
02:44 PM on 07/04/2011
wonderful. I am better for having read this... a rare thing indeed.
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
wwoody
Retired fishing for the truth.
01:22 AM on 07/03/2011
A great man.
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
eddy joe
welcome to the machine
08:24 PM on 07/02/2011
An incredible man, and we were lucky to share in his life.
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
Auracle
I'd rather be anything but ordinary, please
08:00 PM on 07/02/2011
I was never much a fan of Mr. Roger's show (not that I think I watched it much as a kid, cuz my dad was weird that way and didn't want me watching Sesame Street and Mr. Rogers and stuff apparently). I think it's just...not my thing. It just comes off to me as kind of.."too" nice and sugary...whereas I prefer stuff more like Sesame Street where it was more funny and bouncy and stuff.

But, I read a book of quotes of his, and I thoroughly enjoyed it. I think he had much wisdom and I find him to be rather admirable! (And this is coming from an atheist :))
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
guamote
10:01 AM on 07/02/2011
Mr. Rogers gift was to express his faith in a subtle, non-threatening way, and to be inclusive to every child. To believers, we were able to clearly see his faith. To non-believers his faith was expressed in more subtle forms manifesting itself through kindness and acceptance. Those here who objected to him expressing his religious beliefs somehow assume he should have separated them out. Part of who Fred Rogers was is due to his faith. Are you aware that he was an ordained minister? Mr. Rogers greatest success was being able to express his faith while not alienating anyone. He very much lived by the concept of not preaching, but instead used his life as an example of his christian faith. That is the least offensive way to evangalize. His goal may not have been to convert, but through his faith he wanted to lt children know their value and importance. To be offended by that tactic is quite simply more than intolerance. It's really a deep seeded anger really directed at all faith where the objector can't see passed their own hatred.
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
NoSandwiches
07:36 AM on 07/02/2011
Fred Rogers was a great man, and my mom has a book of his quotes in her bathroom that I confess I thumb through on every visit. I wish all people of faith would see him as an example, because his faith never got in the way of his message. I was and still am an atheist and yet I have this deep appreciation for his message for myself as a child and also for my sons. What this world desperately needs is more Fred Rogers.
09:12 AM on 07/02/2011
I think the difference is between Christian and Christlike. Mr. Rogers was a Christian, but he expressed it by being Christlike.
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Social Construct
Go left, young man.
07:03 AM on 07/02/2011
I enjoyed Mr. Rogers' Neighborhood well into my teens. As I said before, in another blog post regarding Fred Rogers, No, I didn't watch Mr. Rogers' show as a teen because I suffered from sort of deficiency. I watched because, sometimes, a person can truly recognize greatness when he sees it. I do not believe in any god but, perhaps, if there were more Fred Rogers among us, I might reconsider.
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RJWalkerStuff
02:30 PM on 07/02/2011
His show started when I was in college, and was on during lunch hour. It was right after some favorite show which would pack my fraternity's TV room. As supercool fraternity guys, we cracked lots of sarcastic jokes during his show.

Funny thing though, we had it on most days and folks watched it.... Hmmmm
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Social Construct
Go left, young man.
09:04 PM on 07/02/2011
So, I'm not as alone as I thought. Groovy. And thank you.
06:12 AM on 07/02/2011
I suspect Fred Rogers would have been a good person regardless......
09:13 AM on 07/02/2011
Possibly. But it's impossible to prove, so let's just be happy that he was a good person.
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
Auracle
I'd rather be anything but ordinary, please
07:44 PM on 07/02/2011
I suspect you are correct. If a person is a good person, they are typically that way regardless of whether they are religious or not. I grew up Catholic, and have since rejected religion, but I am still pretty much the same person who likes to help other people out, and believes in "The Golden Rule" and things like that.
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
notdarkyet
End the Drug War.
12:39 AM on 07/02/2011
My daughter loved Mr. Rogers. We both cried when he died. Same with James Herriot.
06:34 PM on 07/01/2011
I loved watching Mr. Rogers Neighborhood! I watched it and so did my sons when they were little. What a wonderful, kind, loving man and he DID make us feel like we were all special, even those of us with unhappy, abusive childhoods. What a special man he was!
No heaven can heaven be, if Mr. Rogers isn't there to welcome me.
01:44 PM on 07/01/2011
I watched Mr. Rogers in my childhood, and I only realize now how much it affected me. Mr. Rogers was a great man, and even though I am and have always been an atheist, if he came to my door tomorrow to preach the word of god I would not only listen but invite him inside for some lemonade.
Though of course, someone as courteous as Mr. Rogers would never be so rude as to attempt to force their beliefs on others.
06:51 PM on 07/01/2011
He would probably just like it if you were nice to people.
09:13 AM on 07/02/2011
Note: I didn't mean to imp[ly that you were nice to people! I meant that as long as you're nice to people, Mr. Rogers wouldn't care about your beliefs.
12:39 PM on 07/01/2011
Very nice.

Never heard that story about the Emmy speech, but through the miracle of modern technology we can all enjoy it here:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Upm9LnuCBUM
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origamib
Snarky is my middle name.
12:43 AM on 07/02/2011
Oh, thank you. He was such a beloved part of my life and such a wonderful man. Thank you for letting me see this special moment in his life again.
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gracealone
05:32 AM on 07/03/2011
Thank you, I never saw that. Growing up in Pittsburgh I remember this show well. On a field trip we met Mr. McFeeley at a local amusement park and all of my High School age students swarmed to him to meet him and get autographs. Even the cool ones.... I also had occassion to meet Joe Negri who a couple times and I must say that both these men exhibit the same character of Fred Rogers. We all should be grateful to them and how they have helped so many children.
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
Cindbird
Using my head for something other than a hat rack.
09:07 PM on 06/30/2011
I grew up with Fred Rogers. When I had children of my own, every day we sat together to watch Mr. Roger's Neighborhood. It was most important for my youngest son. He had a stroke when he was born and so had cerebral palsy. He is also autistic.

So here was this little boy, wearing braces on both legs and never fitting in with the other kids, listening to Mr. Rogers tell him he was special and perfect just the way he was. It was the ONE time during the day that someone besides Mom and Dad and Brother told him he was fine just as he was. The only time someone else told him he was special.

Now, the cerebral palsy is in remission, he's graduated from High School and is about to turn 18. And even now he talks about how much Mr. Rogers Neighborhood meant to him as a little one. His one regret? That his own children will not have the chance to know this wonderful man who meant so much to him as a little boy, trying to find his place in this world.
10:22 AM on 07/09/2011
I loved Mr. Rogers. I always felt like he was right there in the living room. Your comments brought back memories for me. I wore braces as a little kid also, and that message, "I like you just the way you are." was probably more valuable to me than I even realized...aside: I didn't know CP could go into remission.
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
Forester
Overeducated woods worker.
08:21 PM on 06/30/2011
It is still wrong to presume his god is with anyone.
That stunt crossed his own line and excluded many good people.
Remembering those who helped us into being has nothing to do with his particular religion.
Why is that so hard for religious people to grasp?
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TexasTreader
Fluffy, the yard dog
11:24 PM on 06/30/2011
Nonbelievers often make the mistake of objectifying God, putting Him "over there" as if that were possible. It's not.
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
Forester
Overeducated woods worker.
02:49 AM on 07/01/2011
Answer my question tex, and save the sermon for the flock.

It is YOUR belief system, not humanity's, so it is YOUR job to justify it when trying to spread it, not mine. Using a circular argument gets you nowhere fast. These things actually require you to do some work. You can do it!!!
10:59 AM on 07/01/2011
Why is it so hard for non-religious people to realize that some people have a positive experience with religion, and that it motivates them to do great things?
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
Forester
Overeducated woods worker.
12:20 PM on 07/01/2011
I can only speak for myself Wookie, but I know many religious people, including family members who do great things, but that is because they are good people - they don't need any push from the supernatural. The problem is, many believers (like texasreader) are perfectly comfortable stating that non-believers, even those who do great things for their fellow man, will somehow suffer oblivion if they do not submit to their particular belief system. This is a sad mind set, and is fundamentally destructive.
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
bbriani3842
400+ yrs of science & STILL no evidence for a god