10 Ways to Gain Freedom From Suffering in Daily Life

If you live in the same world I do, more often than not, the mind lets itself be known that it needs a little space -- a break from the habits of daily life, an opportunity to settle into the here and now. Here's the thing. Going on retreats, vacations and taking time away from the daily grind is important and can help us deepen our connection to what is truly important. However, most of our hours are spent here (well, all of our hours are spent here, but you know what I mean). So here is where we seek the power of now.

Vietnamese Buddhist Monk and tireless peace activist Thich Nhat Hanh says: "There is no enlightenment outside of daily life."

Here are 10 ways to gain freedom from suffering in daily life

Note: If you've heard or thought of any of these before, watch your mind's reactions. Then ask yourself when the last time you implemented them is; that's where the rubber meets the road. Allow this to be a gentle reminder.

1. When awaking in the morning, before checking your cell phone for messages, take a few deep breaths and check in with the sensations of your body.
2. Think of one genuinely kind thing to say to one person in your house before leaving the home. If you live alone, wish well for someone in your life.
3. When driving, use red lights as signals to check in with our breath and body. Choose to take a few deep breaths and soften your muscles if they're tense. Wish others on the road safe driving.
4. Walk slightly slower into work or school, open your ears and listen for any birds or other sounds.
5. Practice STOP in the middle of your day.
6. Intentionally listen to a colleague when they're speaking to you (mindful listening).
7. Before leaving work or school, take a moment to look back on the day and note the work that you were proud of and perhaps some things you could do better next time.
8. Before leaving your car to step into the house, again practice a short practice, perhaps a mindful check-in and consider how you want to be the rest of the evening. If there is family at home, how would you like to be with them, if it is just yourself, what would you like the evening to look like?
9. At dinner, consider taking a few minutes of the meal to eat it mindfully, bringing your senses of sight, smell, and taste to the meal. Consider all the work (including your own) that brought this meal in front of you in this moment.
10. As you lay your head on the pillow at night, consider, where was the Good today? For those who are spiritual or religious you might consider asking, where in this day did I notice God?

There's no need to do all of these, just pick a few and begin engaging with them again and again, see what happens. Don't take my word for it, trust your own experience.

As always, please share your thoughts, stories and questions below. Your interaction creates a living wisdom we can all benefit from.

*** Adapted from a publication on Mindfulness and Psychotherapy at Psychcentral.com. Elisha Goldstein, Ph.D. is Co-author of A Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction Workbook. Visit his blog, Mindfulness and Psychotherapy at Psychcentral.com. You may also find him at www.drsgoldstein.com.

 

 

 

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Comments

[Enock Zamora]

09:28 AM on 06/13/2010

There are many books that talk about [suffering], but one can Google: "The Visions of Sundar Singh". In these visions, he talks about why we were not made [perfect] and what suffering actually does. In addition, after reading about his visions, you will never "fear death" again, and have a better understanding of why we are here. The Sophia (Wisdom) of Jesus explains this also, and can be found on the link below:

www.thereluctantmessenger.com

[Marianne TB]

06:43 AM on 06/11/2010

well, yes, suffering comes from desire. some of us desire that our children had not passed on. I wonder how the' enlightened ones' deal with that one? of course, if they havent been thru it, they have no idea. in the meantime, many of us mothers wait patiently to get the hell out of this ridiculous 3 dimensional illusion and be with our children.
and if I see the buddha on the road, I usually laugh at it.

[inthedesert]

09:36 AM on 06/10/2010

By trying to eliminate suffering from one's life one only perpetuates it.....it's simply not possible to have a life without some kind of "suffering"...this is a basic Buddhist tenet: All life is suffering. But, the nice thing about this horrible thought is that once we understand this and ACCEPT it....suffering ends!! It's beautiful actually.

[mcbaby2]

07:48 AM on 06/10/2010

It's a bad headline, but the advise is good!!

[rmship]

06:35 AM on 06/10/2010

I felt better just reading the article...

[FreeSpeech4All]

04:46 AM on 06/10/2010

Darn, I thought this was going to be an article about the real things that would make my life less about suffering, like having a job, food and a place to live. Most of my anxiety stems from the turbulent times we live in, and the uncertainty of the future. Doing these things won't offer the tangible securities that many of us, including myself, once took for granted.

[Speedskater dave]

08:10 AM on 06/10/2010

Maybe the point of this is that the "tangible securities" were never as tangible as you imagined.

[che guevara]

08:57 PM on 06/09/2010

step number one.... don't listen to sarah mclachlan's new cd

[FreeSpeech4All]

04:40 AM on 06/10/2010

Ouch, really? I love her.

[Ed and Deb Shapiro]

06:54 PM on 06/09/2010

Hi Elisha - love your 10 mindful ways - we do these each day

we have had the good fortune of writing a book with Thay as a contributor

I love his telephone meditation and share it quite often with students when teaching at retreats

May all beings be happy

Ed

[Elisha Goldstein, Ph.D.]

10:07 AM on 06/10/2010

Thank you Ed for all the wonderful work you both do to be of service.

[DavidATolucaLake]

03:04 PM on 06/09/2010

Are there really that many people who don't enjoy the brief time each of us have alive.

Sad.

[robin360]

07:04 PM on 06/09/2010

David: Really? You truly don't know this? I think you have chosen a sheltered life, which, is beneficial to you, but isn't part of any solution. Don't be sad about it, help someone.

[LJRettie]

08:27 PM on 06/09/2010

Some of us have really horrible jobs that we do because they give us a sense of social justice. I research and investigate when children die at the hands of caregivers...subject matter that yes, makes me sometimes forget to enjoy the brief time I'm alive. So a reminder to take a moment and reflect, breath and enjoy life helps me continue to do this work that I am passionate about.

[Trinite]

01:58 PM on 06/09/2010

Suffering sustained with love of others in the Divine Presence destroys the ego and allows the transcendant self to appear. The Living Light of Love fills the souls of those who suffer in love and transforms them into God. Suffering sustained with love destroys the self, in which vanishing of the ego the Divinity makes Its home in the soul and frees the spirit making the spirit Divine. Suffering is the human condition and is not to be avoided or feared. It is to be embraced in love in order that the self might disappear and God appear in its place. Suffering is the sign that the self is that which is not and that God is All in all. Suffering is the signal to the soul that God is Present to whom the soul lifts up its eyes in love, and the Merciful One takes the soul into the Heart of Mercy, heals its wounds with the balm of Peace of the Healing Fire of Love and Purity and Seals the soul to Itself in Eternal Life. This begins in the present of the here and now, and is present in this moment now in the soul who says Yes to the Divinity, the sole and single word of love, the only word spoken between God and the soul.

[YOGAmrit Yogi Dr Ajay]

01:56 PM on 06/09/2010

Thanks Elisha for sharing simple but highly practical tips of life.OM.

[Wisdo]

11:51 AM on 06/09/2010

Llife is suffering. The cause of suffering is desire.

Having said that, a bottle of Jameson whiskey eliminates all suffering. FACT.

[Nagarjuna]

12:41 PM on 06/09/2010

Until, of course, the hangover, which is not very pleasant.

[TheFriendlyAtheist]

04:02 PM on 06/10/2010

There is of course suffering in every life, but to say that the cause of suffering is desire is to equate real suffering with disappointment.

[Anne Kelsch Breznau]

11:14 AM on 06/09/2010

Did you ever have the experience of trying to practice these kinds of principles and messing up? I wrote the following about my constant struggle for spiritual enlightenment:

The Buddhists recognize the ebb and flow of this drama we call life. They recommend that we watch it like we'd watch a movie; maybe, we're a little too involved but just when we break out the kleenex and prepare to fall apart, we remember: it's just a movie. They suggest we do that about life. It's just life. It's not really real. Isn't that an amazing idea? I've been a very bad Buddhist for about 20 years (the Buddhists wouldn't think I was good or bad, by the way, which just proves my theory that I'm a bad Buddhist!). I meditate in spurts and then go weeks or months without meditating. I make a stab at not being judgmental and just letting the drama roll by, but inevitably I soon find myself passing judgment left and right like doling out grades to students. As I've mentioned before, I am constantly checking my own grade book in my head. (From http://www.sixtysomethingorother.blogspot.com)

Anne

[Freddc]

11:43 AM on 06/09/2010

if it was easy, everybody would already be enlightened..wait a minute..ok forget that! LOL! the state of abiding non-duality isn't a state..he-he.

there is no try or try, only be

~fredyodeling in the wind

[Arithrianos]

12:29 PM on 06/09/2010

you have been at this for countless kalpas, many many univereses have born and died since you began this course of study. it is not a quick path, and there is no bad, reality is already here, so there is no rush to realize it, it is not going anywhere. relax. then again this is a precious human life and a great opportunity, just do your best, as if you have a choice.

[Anne Kelsch Breznau]

08:19 AM on 06/10/2010

Thanks for reminding me of the multiple universes and lifetimes. There are also karma traumas that come to us from ancestors, I've heard. What do you know about that? Anne

[toddnparker]

10:48 AM on 06/09/2010

A key element is to have control of your time. To stay organized and be efficient with your time, meeting with people, etc. Don't let other people waste your time - stay organized! Online schedulers, such as meebee.com, can be very effective. http://bit.ly/7yXxag

[Freevo]

10:01 AM on 06/09/2010

They are all good suggestions that anyone would benefit from. Being present.