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This Third Grader's Persuasive Writing Skills Are Impressive

05/04/2015 06:19 pm ET | Updated May 04, 2016

For the past few weeks, my son's third grade class has been studying persuasive writing. I am thrilled about this for several reasons, the primary one being that Jack tends to think, "You should do X because I like it." is a sufficiently compelling argument for anything.

I have suggested that it's not, but as all parents know, your own children often do not hear you in the same ways they hear other trusted adults, like teachers. Reason #981 that I have zero interest in home-schooling the boys.

That his teachers have said persuasive writing is cool and useful has made it so, and I have enjoyed recent examples of this work directed just to me.

Exhibit A:

I received this email from Jack last night around 7. He typed it while I was in the room, but instructed me to avert my eyes until he'd finished writing and closed his desktop.

Dear Mom,

I want to know our iTunes password. Most people in my class know there [sic] families. I promise to tell you before I buy anything and won't buy anything inappropriate. So please, I want to know it before 5th grade.

Love,

Your responsible son, Jack

My favorite things about this note are the generous amount of time I have to accommodate his request and his earnest statements about how he'll interact with our iTunes account. Unfortunately, as we over the weekend received a call from a for-profit university specializing in Gaming because Jack had given them all our family information whilst online ("But Mom, I thought they would just share some information with me"), I do not yet think he's ready for iTunes access.

You should have heard the caller's voice when I said that Jack was but 8½. "Oh, I see. Yes ma'am, we'll take him off our call list right now."

It took my husband and me an hour to stop laughing.

Exhibit B:

This note, tightly-wrapped around some Legos for heft (the kid is a good engineer), was thrown down the stairs to me last night after a slight, shall we say, tantrum after my suggesting that because he'd already had two dinners, he really didn't need another.

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This note is less skillfully composed, but he got the damn baguette -- plus dipping oil! -- so I guess it worked.

I spent another hour laughing about this treasure, which I intend to save forever along with the other thrown-down-the-stairs notes (his preferred tactic of reaching out because we have a rule that once we have done the final tuck-in, he's not allowed back downstairs).

Kids.