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Emily Timbol

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What Does God Say About Homosexuality?

Posted: 06/07/2012 4:50 pm

Like most sane bloggers, I try my hardest not to read the majority of Internet comments. Especially on articles that have anything to do with religion, homosexuality, politics or the holy (or un-holy depending on who you ask) trifecta of all three. Recently, though, I caved and peeked on an article posted for a online magazine for which I sometimes write. One of the comments stuck with me. The article compared the civil rights movement of the past to the civil rights movement of the present. The past being African Americans, and the present being gays. The commenter, a friend of mine, said,

"For the record, I have two gay Facebook friends, one professing Christian, and the other I have known since 5th grade. I had a gay boss for 7 years, best boss I ever had; I think highly of him. These truths do not have the ability to change my mind about what God has said, nor should they." (emphasis mine)

As someone who grew up in the church, and has been a Christian since I was a small child, "What God says" is something I don't take lightly. There is a Bible on my nightstand next to my husband and my bed. We believe, like most of our friends, in the saving grace of Jesus. Most every Sunday we attend church. The difference though between me and my Internet commenter friend is that after church there's a strong chance we'll be grabbing lunch with my best friend Danny, and his long-term boyfriend Michael. And I have no problem with their relationship, whatsoever.

It wasn't always like that.

Up until Danny came out to me, I was, at best, ambivalent toward homosexuality and, at worst, convinced that it was indeed what James Dobson told me: a choice and a sin. But having someone that close to me confess something that huge made me examine what I believed to be true, and why. Before his coming out, homosexuality was just a political issue, a hypothetical to be argued over dinner with friends. He was my friend though, my closest, and that reality made it clear -- this wasn't an issue, this was people, people like Danny, who I love like family.

I poured over my Bible, searching it for answers, becoming discouraged by the so-called "clobber" passages. The supplemental books I ordered on Amazon, and conversations I had with religious "elders" all seemed to tell me the same thing -- that Christianity and homosexuality were mutually exclusive; you could be one or the other, but not both. The more time I spent with Danny, the less convinced I was. So I turned to the one place I had somehow forgotten to turn: God himself.

After every talk with Danny, or sermon that seemed to condemn him, I prayed. I asked God if I had to choose between being supportive of Danny, or being a "good" Christian and encouraging him to "flee his lifestyle." I re-read the passages, only this time I read the chapters and books surrounding them, looking for the purpose in what the author was saying. Over time, what became clear to me was that the Bible was never meant to be used to "clobber" anyone. There was a reason why God, and Jesus specifically, used relational stories and parables to get across His message. Not just because God loved people. But also because God knows that the best way for people to learn, change and grow is from relationship. I started to believe what I believe now, that wanting Danny and Michael to have the right to get married did not mean I was not a Christian, or that I was "misinterpreting" the Bible. It meant I was interpreting it the way that God had led me.

I do not believe it a coincidence that Danny and I became friends over a decade ago. I'm thankful every day that God gave me a best friend who had the courage to be who he was made to be. More than anything, I'm grateful that this relationship has been the filter I've needed to view God's teaching on the issue of homosexuality. Like President Obama, I've realized that it's OK for my views to "evolve." This "evolution" has given me the ability to see what so many of my Christian peers have not. That until you have someone close to you come out, or become good friends with a gay person, you will never be able to fully grasp what it means to tell someone "this is why the Bible says you can't get married."

Anyone who has a good grasp on the Bible knows that it's main purpose is not just to give instructions and rules. It's also a story. One that leads to a man whose life was dedicated to loving the world so much that he died for it. Before using the Bible to take rights away from anyone, I'd encourage my commenter friend, and those like him, to think about how this man spent his time on Earth. Living, working and loving the people he most wanted to affect. Not from far away, but up close and personal.

It appears to me then that what God said is that we should do the same.

 

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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
soma77
Author, Speaker, Retreat Facilitator
04:41 PM on 07/04/2012
God is guiding your friend by giving him the gay life style. Let him grow and evolve as God intended.
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
Sjoerd W
Always look for common ground.
09:43 AM on 07/05/2012
Ehm... perhaps I am reading to much into this, but being gay isn't merely a lifestyle. It's simply part of who you are. Choice of clothing and food are part of a lifestyle, one's sexual preference is not.

Also, interesting use of the word 'evolve'. I think Obama started a trend here ;)
03:03 PM on 07/06/2012
Apathy is a poor response in the face of sinfullness. I have gay friends and I tell them where I stand with it. I believe they are making an immoral choice and wish they would remain celibate. Not every fetish has to be explored, nor does the crevice of every anus. Soma77 what kind of retreats do you facilitate? The get along is to go along? That is not the Gospel of Christ...
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Malebmw
No one gets out alive.
12:05 PM on 07/03/2012
Just because you have a bible and pull out the few verses you can remember, does not make you a bible scholar or a christian for that matter. One thing I just want to point out to all the Christians of the world is that when Jesus walked upon the Earth, he was able to draw the sinners, (homosexuals, prostitutes, liars and theives) to listen to him and want to hear his words, but the Religious men, (pharisees, supposedly christians of the day, priests) could not stand to be around him. And they really knew the bible! Jesus entire ministry was to teach who God is. Not to bash you over the head with scripture and law. The bible is merely a map to direct you to Christ who will show you who and what God is. It's just a shame that most people only can see rules and laws to obey when in fact they are given in a manner of love. The hearer only hears in a voice that they are accustom to hearing. If I tell my children, DO NOT STEP IN FRONT OF A CAR! One hears it as, I don't want you to die and lose you, the other hears it as, You better obey me because I run the show. Believe what you want. respect those of another. One will not change their mind unless they are led to do so.
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05:36 AM on 06/29/2012
"Anyone who has a good grasp on the Bible knows that it's main purpose is not just to give instructions and rules. It's also a story."

If someone has a "good grasp" of the Bible they should also know that the main purpose of the book is the Gospel! Every one of us are sinners regardless of sexual orientation and the gospel is the good news we all need.....
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gal416
is a Bible verse † † †
12:56 AM on 06/29/2012
If you want to help them, be supportive but be truthful also. No one respects those who compromise their beliefs. There are gay people that I am acquainted with and I wouldn't want to hurt them for the world, but I also have a God that I love.
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gsell44
10:00 PM on 06/21/2012
How do we know what God says about anything? Simple we don't!
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gal416
is a Bible verse † † †
12:50 AM on 06/29/2012
Apparently you don't read the Bible.
09:42 AM on 06/29/2012
Apparently you jump to conclusions that have no basis in fact. Reading the Bible does not necessarily mean that the reader accepts it as the literal word of God.

After 3 years of a seminary-based course, I came to the conclusion that the Bible is not the word of God. It was my deep study of the Bible that led me to that conclusion.

You are free to believe whatever you wish. So is everyone else. There are literally hundreds of Christian denominations. Each denomination has its own interpretation of the Bible, and most of them think their interpretation is correct and everyone else's is wrong.

I think that any individual who seeks God finds God in their own way, and each path is valid.
08:58 PM on 06/16/2012
You needs be getting into somebodies bible class my mis-informed friend smh
08:56 PM on 06/16/2012
You should have read that being friends with the world makes you a enemy of God ~ and besides, God can give a damn what this fool thinks!
What she need to do is get in a good bible study and make up her mind as to who's report is she going to believe~ her's or God' smh
04:31 PM on 06/16/2012
God's Word, not a "story", is explicit regarding homosexuality...also, one can be homosexual AND a Christian...that's the beauty of grace.
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
Pho3n1xSun
stupidity is a disease
05:11 PM on 06/12/2012
Thank you Emily for actually taking the time to think and come up with your own conclusion of what God feels you should do in this situation.
07:22 AM on 06/12/2012
"wanting [names] to have the right to get married did not mean I was not a Christian, or that I was "misinterpreting" the Bible. It meant I was interpreting it the way that God had led me."

As an atheist (or something), I can appreciate contemporary religions for the cultural and personal purpose they serve -- social conditioning be it as it is, sentimental attachment to anything like Easter lunch (religious), Thanksgiving (patriotism, national pride) or Wednesday family pizza nights (private sphere).

Respect to the author, for holding something dear to her heart for whatever sentimental cultural reasons (as I interpret most religious people), and would argue that she's obviously concerned and prays about issues while questioning/assessing her faith (as all Christians strive to do) -- believes a) "God has a plan," b) trusts in God and prays for guidance etc.. c) is humble to allow her beliefs to evolve.

I'd say she's a "good Christian," in analytical standards -- in that she humbly continues to question and seek the truth.

I am comfortable acknowledging that I know absolutely nothing about God, which makes me feel the most comfortable with the idea of God. So I applaud Christians who are challenged and tormented with their beliefs, and question their own faith.

Thanks for your humility and openness to "question" everything you know.
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01:10 AM on 06/12/2012
In an earlier post Wisdomteeth wrote, "there are two types of religious people".

This may be true in today's "cafeteria style" religion where one cherry picks what one wants to believe. But, if the religion you have faith in, has a truth or even the truth, there is no possibility of any compromise on that truth.
Therefore, you must be orthodox and fundamentalist or nothing. There is no such thing as a liberal or moderate or even tolerant religious person, in dogmatic principle.
In more brutal (but significant) terms, your religion either has the truth, or it sucks.
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05:41 AM on 06/29/2012
Agree with the "orthodox" comment....I would highly encourage you to not use "fundamentalist" though as it has lost it's original meanin....there were many things that were done in the name of "fundamentalism" that are anything but orthodox.
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03:07 PM on 06/29/2012
Good point.
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12:57 AM on 06/12/2012
"What Does God Say About Homosexuality?"

NOTHING. Strictly nothing. "He" has never said anything to us about anything except in a stone-age book that some pretend to be his word.

But, the fact is, god (any god) has never communicated with any man (or woman) and never will. This is the principle of Inaccsseism; 'know communication with god = know god', but 'No communication = no god'.

If you can communicate with him, please ask him to send you or anyone of us an E-mail to confirm; I do hope he is not computer iliterate.
Thanks.
10:40 PM on 06/11/2012
Question...
Can Christians be friends with Atheists?
07:24 AM on 06/12/2012
Can Calvinists be friends with Catholics, charismatic or non-charismatic non-denominational churches?
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11:27 PM on 06/13/2012
I think an atheist could be a great friend. They will minimally challenge you in ways a christian can not
09:48 AM on 06/14/2012
And the christian will be able to feel so much more superior (unwarranted) because they 'believe' and their friend doesn't.
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michaeljude
05:30 PM on 06/11/2012
funny how god always 'talks' about those things that some humans use against others to bolster their own prejudices............but this same god NEVER talks about why a child dies from cancer, starvation, how nice it would be for this talking god to once, just once, show itself to divert some natural catastrophe or something of that nature............god.............not a deity........but an energy of purely spiritual composite...............it does not talk...........it merely is..........

michael jude, author
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05:52 AM on 06/29/2012
Uhm....actually he has addressed that throughout the Bible. Here's one for you:

Romans 5: "12 Therefore, just as sin came into the world through one man, and death through sin, and so death spread to all men[e] because all sinned— 13 for sin indeed was in the world before the law was given, but sin is not counted where there is no law. 14 Yet death reigned from Adam to Moses, even over those whose sinning was not like the transgression of Adam, who was a type of the one who was to come."
02:45 PM on 06/11/2012
It has always stuck me as odd that "Thou Shalt Not Kill" is open to interpretation.....we can kill in self defense, or vote for the death penalty or kill animals to eat. Lots of interpretation. But the bible on homosexuality?? The few little passages there are are apparently written in stone.
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11:40 PM on 06/13/2012
When we look at the scriptures in the original languages and in context, there is no room for interpretation. Interpretation usually means you didnt like the way it was written. The texts on homosexuality are quite clear on that it a sin