These days, it seems like “feminism” is a buzzword used both for good and bad. On one side, there are those who truly just want gender equality while others view feminism as a crazy push for a woman-dominated society. (It’s not.)
With this rise in feminism also comes a shift in the wedding industry. As women become more empowered by the growing feminist movement, weddings have become more personalized and less ingrained in traditions as men start to play a bigger role and women look to showcase what sets them apart from others.
Once upon a time, girls dreamed up their perfect wedding from a young age and were expected to get married off by the age of 25 so that they could bear children and manage a household. Nowadays, while we may still be dreaming up our weddings at the age of 5, the expectations for women have changed. Women now make up close to half of the nation’s workforce and are excelling in academics at an unprecedented level.
So, if women are seeking equality in school, the workplace, and at home, why shouldn’t they expect just as much from the weddings that they’ve meticulously planned since grade school?
The problem with “feminist weddings” is that they often denounce those who choose to follow social norms even if for their own preference. Who is to say that wearing a veil or taking a partner’s last name makes a woman any less of an advocate for equal rights?
Feminism should be about the freedom of choice without fear of judgment from others – whether you want to wear a white dress or not or whether you want a grand wedding or a courthouse ceremony.
With that said, there are ways to make small changes to incorporate gender equality into your wedding even if you prefer to stick to the traditional style you’ve always dreamed of. Whether it’s bringing your partner into the planning process as an equal party or it’s tossing a bouquet to an all-inclusive group of single guests, a true feminist wedding is one in which a couple comes together to create the best day of their lives. It is one of equal decisions and responsibilities, even if the choice is to incorporate some traditions that are rooted in not-so-equal times.
The times have changed. Wearing a white dress with a veil does not carry the same connotation that it did decades ago. Men can wear engagement rings. Women can walk themselves down the aisle. Everything goes.
At the end of the day, a true feminist wants whatever wedding that makes her (and her partner) happy – because that’s what is important.
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Amanda Zack is a proud millennial and wedding PR specialist with OFD Consulting, based in Richmond, VA. She also serves as a Public Relations adjunct professor at her alma mater, Virginia Commonwealth University. Inspired by the power of words, she is an avid storyteller with a love for animals, weddings, and anything else that elicits a smile.
Connect with her on Instagram at @amandazack.