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What They Should Be Eating This Thanksgiving (And what's eating me)

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(With a little help from Lisa Mende)

Thursday promises the same humdrum cavalcade of Thanksgiving foods for all: turkey, stuffing, cranberries, yams and pumpkin pie. But what really belongs on the menu of these notables this year?

BARACK OBAMA: A fine kettle of fish

MICHELLE OBAMA: One smart cookie

SARAH PALIN: (Media) cold turkey

JOE LIEBERMAN: Humble pie

JOHN MCCAIN: Sour grapes

JOE BIDEN: Good egg

HILLARY CLINTON: Revenge (a dish best served cold)

BILL CLINTON: Red herring

GEORGE W. BUSH: Pea soup, the thickest

RAHM EMANUEL: Cool cucumber

WARREN BUFFET: Milk of human kindness

ALAN GREENSPAN: Crow

CINDY MCCAIN: (Over) dressing

KARL ROVE: Shark's fin soup

JOE THE PLUMBER: Pie in the sky

GUY RITCHIE: Wild oats

CONDI RICE: Lame duck

BILL O'REILLY: Nutty fruitcake

JOHN EDWARDS: Spilt milk

SCOOTER LIBBY: Just desserts (until Bush's pardon)

TED STEVENS: Cooked goose

GENERAL MOTORS, FORD, CHRYSLER: Gravy Train

RACHEL MADDOW: Extra-sharp cheddar

RUSH LIMBAUGH: Small potatoes

LARRY DAVID: "Wackadamia" nuts

DONALD RUMSFELD: Devil's Food cake

DAVID AXELROD: Leek (leak?) soup

FRED THOMPSON: (Back to) chewing the scenery

JIMMY CARTER: Salt of the earth

CHRISTOPHER CICCONE: Spilled beans

JON HAMM: Eye candy

AL FRANKEN: Relish

LEVI JOHNSTON: Chopped liver

MICHAEL BLOOMBERG: Shortbread

GEORGE CLOONEY: My*T*Fine

ALBERT PUJOLS: Piece of cake

DICK CHENEY: Toast